


Still Jack and Daniel Series 1 - Not in Kansas Anymore 3 - Off World - Trouble

by Annejackdanny



Series: Still Jack and Daniel Series 1 - Not in Kansas anymore/No Yellow Brick Road [3]
Category: Stargate SG-1, The Highlander Series
Genre: Action, Adventure, Drama, Hurt/Comfort, Kidfic, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-07
Updated: 2012-05-07
Packaged: 2017-11-04 23:51:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 57,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/399586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Annejackdanny/pseuds/Annejackdanny
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Daniel is shrunk to a seven year old with all his memries intact his life has changed forever - and so has his relationship with Jack. Can they both overcome the past and the grief for what they lost and find a new foundation to move on from what they used to be to what they are forced to become - a family?</p><p>SG-1 is off world on a harmless nice planet with Daniel and the new guy, Doctor Baxter. Things start out nice, until Daniel is tempted by exploring a cave on his own...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Off World  - Trouble

**Author's Note:**

> Another CP warning for this one... it'll stop eventually, I promise

**Off World Trouble**

**I**

  
  


“Hey, Daniel...?”

“Mh?”

Jack sat down next to Daniel who sc ribbled something into his black journal. Nudging his shoulder, Jack whispered, “What do ya think?”

Daniel stopped writing and looked up questioningly at his older friend, well, his much older friend, to be specific here. “I'm thinking about a lot of things, Jack. This planet is really intriguing. The civilization that once lived here was much more advanced than the natives living here now. The writings are very complex, for example, and I'm still not sure I can translate them...”

“Not about the planet, Daniel. About Baxter,” Jack interrupted him impatiently.

Daniel followed Jack’s gaze over to the huge black building where the man in question was taping every inch of the temple walls on video. Gared Baxter had been their fourth try as a replacement for Daniel on the team.

So far he was the most promising choice.

The tall, gaunt man with light brown hair was on his fifth mission with them. It was his premier first contact mission though. Daniel had had to stay on base until the first communication problems had been solved and everyone was sure the natives were friendly.

He shrugged and looked back at his journal. He didn't really know what to answer.

He had some of the writings copied already. He knew Baxter would tape everything, but Daniel liked to have the important parts on paper. By writing the language himself he got a feeling for it. It wasn't rational or logical. It was just the way he worked.

Baxter was still admiring the structure of the temple. He had done the video taping of the first wall this morning while Daniel had stood there, copying the glyphs into his journal. Baxter had smiled down at him like adults do when they think the kid was doing something cute.

At least Baxter had never questioned Daniel's place on the team or the fact that he was going off world. He didn't seem to mind getting dirty and he was engrossed in his work, which was something Daniel could admire. 

“ I think he's okay,” he finally said as casually as possible.

The man was skilled, spoke many languages and he was the only one who had gone through several missions with SG-1 without being scared away by funny weather, non friendly natives or – and that seemed the most important part – a grumpy, sarcastic, and edgy Colonel O'Neill.

“Don't you think he's a little too... geeky?” 

” He's as geeky as he should be in his job.”

“Ah. I see,” Jack murmured.

“He's very focused. He even follows your orders. Shouldn't that count for something? He's easy, I think. He is much more tolerant about the whole military thing than I ever was or will be. He can think outside the box, but is able to cooperate if he has to. He's... fitting in,” Daniel explained, tapping his pencil on the cardboard cover of his journal.

“Yeah, well, I have to get used to the following orders thing, I guess,” Jack quipped.

“Are you going to keep him?” Daniel tried to sound upbeat. But it was hard to ignore the sting about being replaced. Even if it was only for special assignments. Who was he kidding? He was useless on the missions SG-1 was trained for. They were there to save the world. Daniel wasn't big or old enough anymore to save the world.

Jack took off his green cap and rubbed his hands through his salt and pepper hair – which had become more and more salty over the last few months. “I think so, yes.”

“Baxter is a good man. At least you won't have to yell at him much. And he can run very fast if he has to.” Daniel grinned, despite the slight nausea in the pit of his stomach.

“ Compared to all the losers we had to deal with, he's the crème-de-la-crème of geekdom,” Jack admitted.

“ Well, Baxter didn't freak out over your attitude. I think that did it.”

“ Attitude? What attitude?” Jack raised his eyebrows and gave him a wide ** - ** eyed innocent look.

Daniel snorted and shook his head. “You know, Jack... sometimes I wonder who's the brat around here. You were incredibly sarcastic and annoying towards the poor guys who tried to work with SG-1 in the last couple of weeks. I'm used to a lot of your moods and tempers. But even I was never treated that poorly,” Daniel scolded mildly. He had to smile at Jack's expression of mock hurt.

“I had to sort them out, Daniel. It wasn't easy. But shouldn't they know what they're getting themselves into right away? And what do you mean, you were never treated THAT poorly? You've always been the resident kid... guy... on this unit.”

“Maybe,” Daniel grinned, but then sobered up quickly. He put his journal back into his pack and pulled out a chocolate bar. “He likes hockey, you know?”

Jack stared at him. “You're kidding.”

“No. He mentioned it to me. Asked if I like sports. He wanted to know if I like hockey or baseball. When I said no, he told me he loves hockey.”

“Well, that makes my choice much easier.” Jack grinned.

“I thought so,” Daniel answered quietly.

He felt Jack's eyes on him as he chewed the sweet walnut chocolate without really feeling the taste. There was a lump in Daniel's throat and he fought hard not to show his frustration. 

Maybe this Doctor Baxter was going to be the perfect replacement for the always difficult Doctor Jackson. Even as an adult he and Jack had disagreed on many things. Following Jack's lead in the field wasn't always easy. He trusted Jack with his life and would follow him everywhere; he knew Jack was good at what he did. Jack wasn't the stereotypical soldier. He knew when it was right to follow orders and when thinking outside the box was better. But still, Jack was military and even though he had an attitude problem of his own from time to time, he all too often expected Daniel to act against his own judgment and obey orders. Sometimes Daniel did it and a lot of other times he chose not to. 

They had had many fights during and after missions about how to act out in the field, so many different views about the right thing to do. They'd always found a way to work it out, but maybe Baxter would turn out to be Jack's dream of an easy going guy who was doing his job without being a pain in the neck most of the time. He even liked hockey. Go figure.

All of a sudden O'Neill snatched the chocolate bar from Daniel's hand and bit off a chunk.

“Hey! That's mine. Sam brought it for me,” Daniel protested halfheartedly.

“Mmh, it's good.” Jack munched happily.

“Get your own chocolate,” Daniel grumbled and grabbed for the sweet.

Jack gave it back and licked his lips. “Why doesn't Carter ever bring something nice for me? I'd prefer chips or crackers with dip, though,” he complained.

“You're whining, Jack,” Daniel said sternly, but felt his mood lighten a bit.

“To quote you - I'm not whining, I'm just saying.”

“You are. And I never say that.”

“Am not. And you do.”

“Are. And I'm not."

"Not whining."

"Whining, Jack. Big brown puppy dog eyes... and whining.” Daniel grinned, then yelped in surprise as Jack’s hands grabbed him and long fingers started tickling his belly. 

He couldn't stop himself from laughing when Jack growled, “I'll give you puppy dog eyes, Doctor Jackson. Master of the puppy dog eyes – That's you, not me.”

Daniel squealed and tried to get away, but Jack was merciless. His hands crept under Daniel’s jacket, making him giggle and scream with laughter. “Stop it... bwhaaaahaaa... will you just sto... Jack!”

“Gimme me a reason why,” Jack laughed.

“I'm going to wet my pants,” Daniel wheezed, pounding his fists on Jack's arms and chest.

“Eeewww...” Jack let go of him.

Daniel fixed his glasses and found his chocolate bar next to him on the sandy ground. Scowling he pointed at it. “Look what you did. It's ruined. You're just lucky I have another one. Otherwise my wrath would've been horrible.” But he couldn't stop himself from smiling again when Jack  opened the pack, pulled out a new chocolate bar and handed it over.

“ Here. May this lighten your mood and make you merciful on me,” he said.

“Sam knows what I need. And she always brings enough so you can have some, too,” Daniel said as he started to unwrap the bar.

He felt better now. Laughing was always good. And even though he suspected Jack had done the chocolate stealing and the tickling on purpose just to distract him from Baxter and the whole reason why he was becoming a member of SG-1, it still felt good.

“Can you ask her for some salty snacks next time?” Jack suggested hopefully.

“Maybe. If you behave and be nice.”

“Nice to you or to Carter?”

“Um... I don'fwant shou sho be sho nishe sho Sham,” Daniel said around his mouthful of chocolate.

“Daniel, don't talk with your mouth full. That's gross. And as for being nice to Carter...I could try to listen to her power point presentation about the next doohickey she's excited about.”

Daniel stared at him, then laughed again. “You would do that for a few snacks? And besides, you could always take snacks yourself.”

“ But it's nice if someone does it for you,” Jack argued.

 

Daniel nodded. Yes, it was nice. Sam always thought of something like that. He had the impression she was still a little uneasy in his company, but it had gotten better over the last few weeks. She was trying real hard to treat him like nothing had changed. Like he was still the Daniel Jackson he once was.

If he could be sure of anything with Sam, it was that she never tried to be his aunt or mom or baby sitter or anything. He knew she thought he was cute and she found it difficult not to show affection regarding his looks and apparent age.  But she was still just Sam and that was something he really appreciated, Even if she acted a little uneasy sometimes. He assumed she still felt guilty somehow because she wasn't able to fix him. 

But there was no need for guilt. Nobody could fix him. It just sucked. 

Daniel sighed which earned him an alarmed look from Jack. Fun as it was, he didn't want to be tickled to death again, so he quickly smiled and tried to focus on other things. 

Despite the outer impression he gave most people, Jack was well aware of the things going on around him. Especially things having to do with Daniel. He was much more sensitive than he let on. Daniel reached out and squeezed Jack's hand to let him know he was okay.

And he would be.

He would deal with Baxter being on SG-1. There was no other choice, so he had to live with it. Like he had to live with his new height and everything that came with it. 

He was still reading mission reports from other teams to find something, anything, that might help him to get upsized. But resignation was getting the upper hand more and more. With every little spark of hope that died there was something breaking apart inside him. Sometimes he felt like he was losing himself step by step. But then again he had days when he just didn't care anymore. 

After the disaster at the housewarming party, he had tried to give Jack less hardship. 

Jack wanted Daniel to talk if he felt bad or angry – even if the reasons were ridiculous in Daniel's own eyes – instead of throwing tantrums or being sassy just to release his tension. But it was hard. It felt still easier to throw his anger at Jack and risk some sort of punishment, than to just seek comfort or help.

And sometimes it was just a release to fight, to try to get the last word or slam doors. Even though Daniel knew in the end he'd always find himself in Jack's arms, exhausted, crying from time to time or just defeated.

They were both so sick of the fighting and struggling.

"Penny for your thoughts," Jack's soft voice interrupted Daniel's brooding.

"I was just thinking...about... these writing."

"Sure you were." Jack sighed.

"Really. It's difficult. It'll take some time to figure it out. It’s a very complex language. Could be related to something Norse... but only bits and pieces of it."

Jack ruffled his hair. "Just don't work yourself up, okay? If something  bothers you... spill."

Daniel felt the urge to push his friend away, giving him the "I’m fine" line once again. But they were off world and getting into some argument with Jack here wasn't a good idea. They had to concentrate on their mission, simple as it was. So after a brief pause, he admitted, "Baxter is bothering me. But it'll pass."

"I figured that much." After a moment of silence, Jack added, "You know your place is always here, right? If..."

Daniel nodded, opening his journal again. "Yes, Jack, I know."

But there was that little voice of doubt in him, nagging.  _What if I'm really stuck like this forever? What if General Hammond gets the feeling one civilian consultant on SG-1 was enough?_

And if he'd get his own old self back... maybe Jack would rather have this nice guy who liked hockey and was cooperating so much?'

Daniel blinked, confused.

Of course that wouldn't happen. Jack would never want somebody else on the team if Daniel became his adult self again, right? He had said so himself and why shouldn't Daniel believe him? He shook his head and focused on the writing ~~ s ~~ in his journal.

Jack patted his back and got up from the ground. Daniel could hear his knees protesting and winced inwardly. Jack certainly didn't get any younger.

"I'll see if Carter and T have something to report," the colonel told him and walked away. 

*******

Jack looked up at the cloudy bluish sky. The suns were going down soon. Time to set up watches and grab something to eat.

He found Carter at the shore of a small crater lake, collecting sand and water samples for analysis on base. Teal'c was nowhere in sight, but Jack knew the Jaffa was walking perimeters.

She must've heard his boots on the sandy ground. When she looked up and smiled at him, he saw a muddy stripe on her nose and some other dirt on her left cheek. "Sir!" 

"Hey Carter. Found some frogs or anything?"

"No frogs. But there are little insects in the water, and fish. You should try to catch some."

He raised an eyebrow. "Alien trout?"

"Well, maybe you'll have better luck here than in Minnesota," she suggested.

"What if they're poisonous? Or intelligent?"

"The natives eat them. I don't think our metabolism is that different from theirs."

Jack had to grin at her. He couldn't help it. "Carter, you look like Daniel after digging up rocks in the dirt."

She rubbed the sleeve of her jacket over her nose, which turned out to be a bad idea as it only smeared the dirt all over her face. 

"Uh... are you planning on joining the natives in some fancy ritual?" Jack smirked.

She bent down to clean her face with lake water. When she turned back to him, there was a sparkle in her eyes he couldn't read. She picked up something green and held it out to him. "Can you hold this for second, sir?"

Without thinking, he took the slimy water plant into his hand and felt his fingers caught by some strong leave s curling around his index finger and thumb. "What the..." he started when he saw the grin on her face.

"Just hold it for a second while I get the container for it."

"Carter! It's alive," he groused.

"No it's not. It's just a plant. Some kind of fast growing seaweed."

She picked up the container and very carefully took the clinging plant from Jack's hand so she could put it into the receptacle. "Thank you, sir."

Jack stared down at his hand, half expecting something weird to happen with it.

"Did Doctor Baxter tell you we're invited to feast with the natives tonight? It's a ritual to pray to the weather god and ask for good crops," Carter told him as they were picking up several containers and then followed the path back to camp.

"No. A weather god ceremony, you say? No sacrifices, I hope," Jack murmured. He felt always  uneasy about joining cultural celebrations like this. They had been in too many very unpleasant situations because of cultural misunderstandings over the past years.

"Daniel said he talked to the first chief of honor. The feast seems to be a good idea. Nothing dangerous.”

"So Daniel wants us to go? And he's sure it's all right to go?"

"Yes. Doctor Baxter confirmed his opinion."

"I don't need Baxter to confirm Daniel's opinion," Jack growled.

Carter gave him a surprised look. "Of course not, sir. All I said was that both our anthropologists think it's safe and we should go. Nobody thinks Daniel is less competent only because he is less... big."

"Yeah. I wish Daniel knew that, too," Jack muttered.

Before Carter could answer him, they reached camp.

Daniel and Baxter were standing at the temple walls, discussing something. Daniel was stroking his hands over the writings and Baxter nodded to his explanations. They looked up at the little window-like holes, the only openings of the building high above their heads. The holes were too small to let a man through. Daniel had said they might be kind of an air circulation system.

Both, Jack and Carter, watched them for a moment. Daniel looked right at home where he was; this focused expression on his face and the enthusiasm in his voice as he was talking to Gared.

Teal'c returned from his walk and joined them by the tents.

Jack informed him of their evening plans and added, "I think we should go then, kids. We don't want to be late." 

Daniel took his journal and a pen with him, while Baxter tucked the video cam in his pocket. O'Neill and Teal'c led the group, Daniel and Baxter took the middle while Carter was their rearguard.

They walked along the crater lakes, and over the plateaus to reach the native village. This planet was rich with water and mountains remindeding Jack of the Grand Canyon. But the alien Grand Canyon wasn't red. It had the color of yellow sandstone. Wide meadows and groups of trees covered the valleys. Some of the many lakes produced small rivers. The biggest of those lakes had small islands. Some of them rich with vegetation and others just plain large rocks, where lots of birds basked in the sun or built their nests.

It was a nice planet.

Not too many trees, Earth-like weather, temps resembling a warm spring day in Colorado. They had been here for days and the natives seemed to be friendly, if a little primitive. No technology to report so far. But for once, Jack wasn't under pressure to bring home something valuable or save the world. Once they had established the folks of P34X whatever were friendly guys, this mission was merely to collect samples and let the scientists have fun with the temple and the foreign culture they had to explore.

No snake heads, no other unfriendly people.

So far.

However, Jack still kept a sharp eye on the friendly folks. And on Daniel. Peaceful and quiet was a good thing. But being watchful was better than running into ugly surprises. 

When they reached the village of small loam houses, there was already a large fire burning in the middle of the gathering place. Wooden tables, overloaded with all kinds of food had been placed around the square and people stood together in groups, talking or eating. The older men kept throwing something into the fire from the grass baskets in their gnarled hands, which caused the fire to flare up. A strange smell hovered in the air.

Daniel wrinkled his nose. "This must be some kind of herbal leaf. Smells funny. I think this is to get the weather god's attention."

"Or to make the weather god high. Smells like the biggest joint I've ever had," Jack said.

Carter stared at him. "You had joints, sir?"

Teal'c turned his head. "What is a joint, O'Neill?"

Before Jack had a chance to respond, Daniel explained. "It's a cigarette, but not a normal one. A joint is filled with dry leaves of a plant. Smoking a joint makes you open for illusions. You get high. That means you can see things that aren't there. It's a drug."

"This drug is a hallucinogen then. Does it have a cultural background of some sort? The Goa'uld use hallucinogen drugs for the purpose of torture." Teal'c shared.

"There are several Earth cultures who believe drugs are the window to visions about the future or other spiritual things. Some Indians for example used the juice of a certain cactus to g et high," Ba xter said.

"Sir? Did you really have joints?" Apparently Carter was either shocked or fascinated. 

Jack opened his mouth, when Daniel piped up, "Peyote. That's the name of the cactus. Peyote was known to the Chichimeca and Toltec at least 1890 years before the arrival of the Europeans. It's not known whether or not the Chichimeca were the first Indians to discover the psychoactive properties of Peyote. Several seventeenth-century Spanish Jesuits testified that the Mexican Indians used Peyote medicinally and ceremonially for many ills and that when intoxicated with the cactus they saw ’horrible visions. Peyote was usually drunk but its use, even medicinally, was forbidden and punished, since it was connected with ’heathen rituals and superstitions to contact evil spirits through  ** ‘ ** diabolic fantasies.’"

Doctor Baxter turned to Daniel and gave him an approving look. "Your knowledge about old Earth cultures is impressive, Daniel. I bet you will be a very competent and successful scientist when you grow up. Like your uncle, Doctor Jackson, was."

"Yeahsureyabetcha," Daniel murmured, mimicking Jack. 

Teal'c broke the ensuing silence, to avoid further conversations regarding Daniel's ’uncle.’ “It would be very interesting to hear about your experience with smoking such a delusional plant, O'Neill."

Jack rolled his eyes at the Jaffa. "Weeell, that was way back in the late sixties, long before I was the mature and responsible guy I am now. And I don't remember a thing. I smoked, I passed out, I woke up, I puked and had a sonofabitch of a headache... end of story."

"Wow," Carter said. "I don't know what you had been smoking. I tried it once and didn't feel a thing."

"Why am I not surprised here, Major," Jack said, clucking his tongue. "I bet you were analyzing the ingredients while you smoked it."

Now it was Carter who rolled her eyes. "I heard of people who lost a few brain cells through excessive joint smoking."

Jack raised his eyebrows at her. "Really? Now I know why I can't follow your tr ain of thoughts most of the times. Thank you for enlightening me, Major."

She snorted, but then grinned. Was th at insubordination? Jack glowered at her and after a moment she had the decency to turn away, still grinning. 

Teal'c asked, "What plant was it you consumed, O'Neill?"

“ Don't know. Lost brain cells here."

Daniel said, "The most popular plant for joints is cannabis. When the northern Indians used it, it was much stronger then the plant we know today. Some legends say if you smoke enough of this strong stuff, you're able to leave your body and fly. Maybe that's what Jack did when he passed out."

Carter snorted again.

"Does alcohol have the same effect on humans? It is considered a drug too," Teal'c asked.

"Only beer," Daniel said, face straight, "Beer makes you fly, too." An evil little grin appeared on his face. "That's why they call Jack a flyboy."

Carter seemed to have a coughing fit. 

Daniel decided to walk next to Teal'c for the rest of the way. 

Jack reached behind the big warrior and gave his littlest teammate a playful whack on the back of his head.

"I'm just saying," Daniel quipped, all innocent.

The Jaffa put a protective hand on the kid's shoulder.

They reached the gathering place and the sweet smell of the herbals grew stronger. It wasn't exactly unpleasant. A bit like Jasmine maybe. 

Jack hoped it wouldn't make them fly.

The chief of the village was seated in a large wooden chair. Feathers and other decorations, like pearls and colored stones, had been braided into his long white hair. It wasn't exactly Indian, more like Gypsy. Well, at least that was Jack's take on it. He might be wrong anyway.

The man didn't appear to be as old as one would imagine a leader of a whole village. He seemed even younger than Jack. But his eyes spoke of a long life and wisdom. 

When they reached chief Kink-ah's chair, Jack let Baxter do the talking.

The new member of SG-1 thanked Kink-ah for the invitation and told him it was an honor to be part of this ceremony, yadda yadda. 

The colonel lost track of the conversation, confiden t that Baxter or Daniel would inform him if something unusual was said. He let his eyes wander over the place, taking everything in, his hands absently playing with the handle of his P90. Happy people in colorful flowing garments, mostly with white long hair. There were men, women and kids of all ages. There was really nothing odd here. 

And yet, Jack felt the hairs at his neck rise when his nostrils took in the sweet scent of herbs. It was dark now and the fire flared higher and brighter.

A burly boy Daniel's age came running towards them, his long blond mane flying behind him. He stopped in front of SG-1 and offered Daniel a plate with some kind of cake. "Here. You want eat?"

Daniel looked questioningly at Jack, who eyed the food suspiciously.

"I don't think they are poisoning us, sir," Cart er said, smiling at the boy.

"Wedding cake," Jack warned to remind her of what could happen if someone was eating the wrong kind of cake.

"Yes, but they're all eating it here," Daniel interjected, "The wedding cake was only for – you."

"You just had to remind me, didn’t you?" Jack hissed.

"Well it was very funny – before you lost your charming looks and things got a little... ugly," Daniel shrugged and ducked away to stand next to his giant warrior friend again.

"You can't stand in T's shadow all night, my friend." Jack smiled sweetly.

The boy looked puzzled from one human to the other. Then an understanding smile spread out on his face and he broke off a piece of the cake and put it into his mouth. "Good," he praised, rubbing his belly. Then he said. "Tink-ah."

Daniel pointed at the cake. "Tink-ah?"

The boy laughed and shook his head, pointing at himself. "Tink-ah."

Daniel grinned and mirrored the gesture. "Daniel."

"Dan-el," Tink-ah said.

The chief nodded in the boy's direction and held up his hand. "Tink-ah, my fourth son."

Jack tipped his hand at the peak of his cap. "Tink-ah, nice to meet ya. I'm Jack. That's Sam and Teal'c. And Gared."

Tink-ah looked thoughtful for a moment, then asked, "Can Dan-el come? Play?"

“Sure I can," Daniel said and followed Tink-ah into the crowd of celebrating people.

But Jack was faster and had his hands on Daniel’s BDU jacket before he could get lost. "Aht! Not so fast Doctor Jackson."

"Ja-ack..." 

"Rules?" Jack asked, unimpressed by the loud whine.

"Argh... look left and right before crossing the street, don't go with foreign people, don't take candy from..."

"You want us to go somewhere private to discuss this, Daniel?"

"Noooo. Okay. Don't leave the village, be at attention, keep your radio on and report back every hour."

"Good. Watch? Radio?"

"All here. I'll be careful, Jack. Can I go no w?"

Jack let go and watched him trail off with his new friend. He knew this was a great opportunity for Daniel to learn more about these folks. It wasn't about playing but all about observing. It was what Daniel did. There was no danger here. Why did he feel so damn anxious every time Daniel separated himself from the team?

Sure, he had always felt a little alarmed when the team got separated for some reason. But with Daniel, trouble always seemed to happen just like that. Trouble found Daniel, not the other way around. When Daniel had been a man, Jack had been worried, but confident that the guy could take care of himself. And he could. Most of the time.

Now... Now things weren’t the same.

Letting Daniel play in his favorite sandbox meant letting him go off on his own sometimes. Not only because Daniel knew how to do his job, but also to let him know he was still a valuable member of SG-1 and not just a kid who needed a baby sitter.

But Jack wanted to stick a baby monitor with duct tape on Daniel´s back.

He considered sending Carter or T after him. But he had done that once and Doctor Jackson had been mad at him for days.

Well, he was overprotective. And? So? Therefore? 

He knew how easily Daniel could be distracted, now that he was a kid. He just wanted to make sure the rugrat wouldn't get into some kind of crap.

Oh, yeah, and they'd had this very long talk about independence and competence with General Hammond. About Daniel's need for Jack to trust him. It was frustrating. Jack did trust Daniel. He just didn't trust the rest of the universe not to mess with his pint sized friend. He let out a sigh and turned back to Baxter and the rest of his team.

The Chief told them to eat and enjoy themselves.

Carter guided them to the food tables.

Jack felt himself looking for Daniel.

Of course, he was nowhere in sight.

His hand crept to his radio, but he stilled it and forced it back down, cradling his P90 in his arms. He had told Daniel to report every hour, not every minute.

"I do not believe DanielJackson is in any immediate danger, O'Neill," a deep voice from his right assured him.

"He'll have fun, sir," another voice from his left.

"Young Daniel has a way with these people," Baxter had to throw in his two cents.

Jack grabbed his weapon more tightly. "Who said I was worried?"

"Your expression is very readable," Teal'c said helpfully. Not.

Carter patted his arm. "Let's eat something, Colonel."

"Yeah." Jack squinted down at his radio.

Baxter went to one of the food tables and returned with plates full of fruits and dried meat. He handed one to Jack and another one to Teal'c, then went back to get m ore for Carter and himself. 

Carter eyed Jack's food. "This looks really good, sir. Like pineapple and mango. And the meat must be from the birds we saw everywhere. I haven't seen any other big animals here. That green stuff is... oh, it's a... a... plant." 

Jack picked up the long dark leafs and sniffed them. "Smells like... something green," he said. Then his eyes narrowed. "That's not one of these slimy ugly things you put in my hand before, Carter, is it?"

With a sweet smile she shook her head. "Oh no, sir. I don't think so."

Teal'c, who was already eating from the plant, stopped chewing and tilted his head to one side. "I believe it is a seaweed. I saw some women of this tribe take it from one of the lakes and..."

"No Teal'c. It's not seaweed. Trust me," Sam said, poking him with her elbow.

Jack glared at her and decided not to eat the green plant. He tried the fruits and the meat and found them delicious. But his mind was on alert and his eyes kept searching for a blond head in the crowd.

**II**

Daniel and Tink-ah sat crossed-legged on the ground near the fire and watched the women of the tribe doing the weather dances.

The dancers wore blue and yellow glittering skirts and several paintings drawn on their upper bodies. They had pearls and feathers in their hair and around their necks. Four men were beating drums and percussion and one very beautiful young guy was singing a hypnotizing guttural song.

Daniel scribbled in his journal, his cheeks flushed from the heat of the fire and the excitement of the whole celebration. Tink-ah had explained to him the movements of the dancer and what the singing meant. 

When he put away his pen and concentrated on the dance, Tink-ah was laughing. "You fun."

"Me? Why?"

"Writing... much. We tell stories. No writing. Little people write. Not we."

Daniel raised his eyebrows at his new friend. "Little people?"

"Yes. Little people live in mountain. Legend. They written word. We talk soul to soul, stories and wisdom mouth to ear."

"That explains why no one knows anything about the writings on the temple walls," Daniel said. When Tink-ah just looked at him, he explained. "The writings on the building... the tall building without doors. We showed it to your people but they couldn't tell us anything about the words."

Tink-ah nodded. "Written words lie. Spoken words not. Little people write."

Daniel thought about this for a moment, then asked, "Do the 'little people' live in the tall building? The black building?"

The other boy nodded. "Yes. Underneath. But legend. Temple old. Nobody go there. No doors. Just lump of rock."

"What were they? Those 'little people'? Were they your e nemies?"

Tink-ah scrunched up his round face while he was thinking of what to say. Then he got up and grabbed Daniel's hand to pull him to his feet.

"Tink-ah show Dan-el. Come. More writings. But secret.  Must not tell."

As Daniel followed the boy over the gathering place, he asked, "Is writing forbidden? I was on a planet once... Abydos. My home for a while. There they weren't allowed to write. Their go d forbade them to learn letters and..."

"Yes, yes. Forbidden by fathers of the fathers. For long time."

They left the gathering place and a moment later the darkness of the night swallowed the two kids. 

They ran alongside a few of the small houses and before Daniel was aware of it, they had left the village.

When they reached one of the crater lakes, Tink-ah searched for something at the shore. Finally he waved at Daniel to come over and together they shoved a wooden boat to the water and jumped in. Tink-ah took the paddles and started to leave the shore with fast strong row strokes.

When Daniel looked back he could see the flames of the fire in the night and hear the far away noises of music and laughter. But here on the water it was dark and still. He heard the splashing of the waves against the boat and felt a soft wind stroking his flushed face.

It was wonderful.

He felt free.

"Not far. Other side of lake. Cave with drawings," Tink-ah whispered.

"Of the 'little people'?" Daniel asked, excited.

"Yes. Very old. Father not know we go there. He angry. Very angry," Tink-ah said. But he didn't stop the boat.

The mentioning of Tink-ah's father made Daniel realize he was into big trouble, too, if they got caught or something happened to them.

That reminded him to check his watch.

When he realized it was close to report time, he hit the button on his radio and called Jack. Tink-ah gave him a panicked look and stilled the rowing. Daniel made a calming gesture with his hand, when Jack answered his call with a terse, "Where are you, Daniel?"

"We are okay, Jack."

"Where are you?"

"Tink-ah is showing me something interesting at his house." The lie was out before he even realized what he was saying.

"Don't go too far, okay?" Jack's voice sounded unsuspecting and Daniel felt his heart pound in his chest. He'd never lied like this to Jack before... 

But Jack would order him back ASAP if Daniel told him the truth. And if he tried to avoid the question, the colonel would come looking for him. Daniel wanted to see what Tink-ah offered to show him. What choice did he have?

"Don't leave the village. And be careful, kiddo."

Even over the radio Daniel could hear the worry in his friend ** ’ ** s voice.

He bit his lower lip. "I'll be careful, Jack-o," he answered with false sarcasm, ignoring the sick feeling in his gut.

"And get something to eat, Danny. This food is good," Jack said more lightly.

"Yes. I will."

"Okay. O'Neill out."

Daniel closed his eyes, feeling bad about this. God, he just hoped they wouldn't get in some kind of trouble here. If the rest of SG-1 had to rescue them, he'd need someone to rescue him from Jack afterward.

 

 

A moment later they reached the other side of the lake and pulled the boat up on the sandy beach. Daniel made sure the boat was secure. If they had to swim back, he would have too much to explain about wet clothes.

They ran across the beach and the grassland until they reached the mountains. Tink-ah guided Daniel into a narrow canyon. Two big looming moons showed the boys their way over fallen rocks and small paths until they reached a high rock wall. Tink-ah searched for a moment and then waved at Daniel to follow him to a small entrance.

"I have torch here. I come to play. But father not know. Dangerous. Here..." The native boy reached into an alcove and retrieved a torch. He handed it to Daniel and used two small firestones to light it. Then Tink-ah took over the torch and guided Daniel through a narrow passage into a large cavern. 

All of Daniel's qualms about lying to Jack were gone in an instant when the fire lit up the room.

It was beautiful.

The deeply fissured rock walls were of the same sandy color as the mounta ins. And there were drawings and writings all over them. Some of the pictures and paragraphs had been destroyed over the years, but there was still enough to read and look at. Daniel started to wander around the cavern, touching the walls in awe.

The air was dry and dusty, causing him to sneeze three times in a row. The boys jumped when his sneezes were echoed back from the walls like thunder. After the first shock, Tink-ah started to laugh and Daniel fell in. A moment later the whole cavern was ringing with the echo of the children's laughter.

When they stopped giggling, Tink-ah followed Daniel across the room, holding the torch for him. 

Daniel felt his heart beat faster.

This was amazing.

If only he could read this language. He wasn't sure about its relationship to old Norse anymore. He couldn't figure it all out. These writings were like nothing he had ever seen in his life. And he had seen a lot over the last few years. All he could say for sure was, this language resembled the writings on the temple walls.

Tink-ah was no help since he couldn't read the words. But there were also pictures. Daniel suddenly wished he had the video camera. With a sigh, he retrieved his journal and pencil and started to copy some of the drawings. The pictographs were ver y detailed and as he looked at some of them, he found drawings of the 'little people'. Most of the pictures showed small human figures – mostly men but also a few women – who were hunting or building something. 

What caught his eye was just how little they seemed to be. Apparently there had been other animals than just birds on this planet once. Big cow ** - ** like cr eatures. And compared to those animals the people were like children. Small and fragile. When they hunted, they always went in groups of five to ten men. Then Daniel found a drawing of a tall human man and a few of the 'little people' next to him. Those people had been tiny. Maybe even shorter than he was now.

Daniel felt a sudden sympathy for these long gone human beings.

He walked around to find more pictures and when he looked from drawing to drawing it suddenly dawned on him that the pictographs showed the history of how the temple had been built by those 'little people'; the same odd tall building with writings on the walls SG-1 had been exploring over the last days.

"Wow," Daniel whispered. 

"You like?" Tink-ah let the light of the torch dance over the cave walls, where it formed odd shadows in the little alcoves of the rock face.

"Yes. Thank you so much for showing me this, Tink-ah. I need to come back here. I have to tape this. It's amazing," Daniel said softly.

“But you not telling. My father angry. Nobody know," the other boy said in a hushed voice. Daniel took Tink-ah's hand and squeezed it, to seal his promise.

"No. I won't tell. I'm in trouble, too, if I tell. I'll find a way to come back before we leave."

"I come with," Tink-ah promised and squeezed Daniel's hand back.

All of a sudden Daniel realized he had a new friend. His first kid-friend. And it felt strangely good. "Thanks."

Tink-ah grinned back. "Secret."

"Yeah. Our secret." Daniel sighed. They had to go now if they didn't want to be caught.

They walked back the narrow passage and Tink-ah put out the torch and placed it into the alcove.

When they left the cave, they were greeted with fresh air and a light wind. They ran to the beach and pulled the boat down to the water. Tink-ah was rowing very fast and they had just secured the boat at the shore when Daniel's radio clicked and Jack's voice came out of it. "Daniel, where the hell are you?"

He froze in place, panicked for a second. But he got over it and answered the call. "I'm here. We'll return to the gathering place now. Where're you?"

"We're looking at the dancers. You're late for your report, young man. Get back here. Now."

Daniel answered nervously, "Coming." He felt his teeth working on his bottom lip.  He just hoped Jack wouldn't ask too many questions about where he had been and why he hadn't reported in time. The sick feeling was back, nagging at him.

He called himself an idiot. It wasn't as if he had been in a life ** - ** threatening situation  or anything. So he told a little white lie. As long as Jack thought he was following orders, he wouldn't worry and there would be no fights. They had done enough fighting and right now they were having a good time together and Daniel wanted it to last. They hadn't gotten into serious arguments since they'd arrived on this world. It was wonderfully harmonic and felt so good just to be with SG-1, having fun, working and enjoying it for a change. 

Daniel didn't want to spoil this.

It was the right thing to do, wasn't it? Of course it was. Having qualms about it was normal. It would pass. 

The boys headed for the village where the feast was still in full flow. 

Out of breath they finally entered the gathering place. 

New dancers in different outfits were dancing to a different kind of music. It had been drums before. Now the musicians were playing some kind of flute.

Daniel hit his radio. "Jack? Where are you? I can't find you."

The answer came right away. "We are about to leave. Come to the Chief to say goodbye."

Daniel and Tink-ah pushed and pressed through the crowd of people until they saw SG-1 gathered around the Chief's chair.

Daniel stepped next to Sam and avoided looking at Jack when they thanked Kink-ah for the nice evening and wished him good weather and enough rain for the next harvest. He felt his chest tighten. If he apologized to Jack about not reporting on time, maybe he wouldn't ask too many questions. Suddenly he was aware he would have to tell more lies if Jack wanted to know where they had been in detail. He hadn't thought of this before. And all of a sudden he realized he had to lie again if he wanted to return to that cave tomorrow. Daniel felt very tired all of a sudden, and his head started to hurt. What had he gotten himself into?

Tink-ah smiled one last time at Daniel before he vanished into the dark.

*******

Their way back to camp was filled with silence.

Jack brooded over whether or not to be angry with Daniel for not reporting in and taking his own sweet time to come back to them. 

Daniel always had to go one little step too far. 

But gosh, the kid ha d looked so happy and relaxed when he returned with his new pal. He had fun and had forgotten the time. So what? He was all right. Should Jack go and spoil Danny's good mood with scolding? This place seemed to be good for Daniel, as far as O'Neill could tell.

If he pulled rank on Daniel now and grounded him to camp for the rest of their stay, he'd feel bad about it tomorrow. Maybe he should just bark a little and then let it go. He was still in the process to get over this issue when he felt tug at his sleeve and a little voice somewhere near his elbow mumbled, “I'm sorry, Jack. For not reporting. You mad at me?"

Could the kid read his mind? Jack waved his flashlight a little so he could see Daniel's face. He looked... really sorry. 

"You had fun, did you?" he asked instead of answering right away.

Now the expression  on Daniel's young face changed into one of pure joy. Even in the light of the flash Jack could see how much fun he must have had.

"Oh yes! Tink-ah showed me a lot of stuff. It was cool. I now know so much more about... about... everything."

Jack put his arm around Daniel's shoulder. "I'll let it go. This time. I'm too tired to have an argument with you anyway. But you know we have this agreement about rules for a reason, right?"

There was silence for a minute. Then Daniel said quietly. "I know I broke the rules. You can... smack me one if you think you should. Just... just don't ground me or send me home... please?"

Jack stared down at Daniel's bowed head. "Daniel? Is there something else you'd like to tell me? "

"No, not really. I'm just sorry. That's all. And tired."

Jack stopped walking and bent down to have a closer look at the boy. "You know what? I'm too old to carry my archeologist home. But I might make an exception just for you."

"No, thank you. I can walk." But he didn't move away from Jack's hand on his shoulder as they walked on. 

By the time they reached camp, Daniel was yawning widely and Jack sent him to bed. He went into his tent without any arguments and when the colonel looked in on him a few minutes later, Daniel was fast asleep, curled up on his sleeping bag.

Jack knelt down and pulled the sleeping bag out from under him. He opened it, gently tucked the boy into it and pulled up the zipper. When he stroked away some of the blond hair, his fingers touched moisture on Danny´s face.

O'Neill wiped away the fading traces of tears and kissed the warm forehead. He rarely got the chance to get away with kissing him like this when Daniel was awake.

_I really want to know what you're not telling me._

He had the impression Daniel had been happy this evening. Why tears? Should Jack ask him tomorrow? Or was it better to wait until the kid came out with it. If he ever did. 

Still deep in thoughts Jack took off his jacket and crawled into his own sleeping bag next to Daniel's. He reached over and took Daniel's hand in his own for a moment before he finally let himself drift to sleep. 

*******

_Chief Kink-ah's smooth manly face looked at Jack and his eagle eyes were hard as steel, when he spoke. "Going to the cave is against our law. You shall be punished and so shall your boy."_

_Jack jerked up his head and glared at the Chief. "But I didn'_ _ t know Daniel went out there. He never told me." _

_ "That not relevant. We follow law. If you cannot control your young, you should not bring them." _

_ Daniel stared at his friend, but Jack refused to look at him. They had their hands bound in front of them and were on their knees before the chair of the Chief. _

_ Their feet had been tied, too. _

_On his other side Tink-ah knelt, his face down in shame._

_Three armed guards poked lances into their shoulder blades._

_Kink-ah waved at the guards. "Take the man away. They shall not see each other until dawn. Then they can face their death together."_

_Daniel tried to ge_ _ t to his feet, but one of the warriors threw him down into the sand. He wanted to yell, but was tongue-tied. The guards grabbed Jack's shoulders and dragged him away. Jack started to buck and yell. "Let the kids go! I'm responsible for Daniel... just leave him alone. And you can't kill your own son..." _

_They pulled Jack across the gathering place towards one of the buildings._

_Daniel watched with horror as they kicked Jack in his side to stop his resistance. Chief Kink-ah rose from his chair and looked down at Daniel. "You have to blame only yourself for this, young Dan-el."_

_He leaped up on his knees again, twisting his head to see Jack disappear in a house. "No! Don't hurt him! I'm sorry! Jack! Jack!” He wanted to crawl after his friend, but strong arms were holding him back. He couldn't move. He tried to fight, screaming, "Jaaack! Nooo, no, please, no..."_

_There was a voice somewhere calling his name, but Daniel didn't care. He had to go after Jack and rescue him, tell him he was sorry he'd lied to him and that it was all his fault. But the voice kept calling and arms were cradling him..._

  
  


... Very slowly, Daniel realized that he had been dreaming.

He buried his face into Jack's shoulder and clutched his hands to the black t-shirt while he was being rocked like a small child.

“Shhh, it's okay. Nobody's going to hurt anybody. Just a bad dream, Danny... sshhh... I'm here. Are you with me? C'mon, buddy, say something."

He let out a shaking breath and nodded against Jack's shoulder. "´kay."

There was a rasp outside the tent and Daniel heard the nylon zipper open. Sam's voice was low and worried, "Sir? Daniel? Is everything okay?"

"Yeah. Just a nightmare. What time is it anyway," Jack answered, his voice still a little raspy from sleep.

"It's about time for your watch, Colonel. I was on my way to wake you when I heard the screams," Sam explained.

"I’ll be out there in a minute, Major."

Daniel heard Sam leave as he snuggled closer to Jack. He wasn't ready to let go yet. But the sick feeling was back. He knew he should tell Jack and face the consequences. But something was still holding him back.

And it wasn't the fear of Jack's anger or being a coward. He just couldn't risk being sent home for punishment. If they were sending him home he'd never be able to go back to the cave. And he wanted to go there again. It had been exciting and there was so much more to explore.

Besides, he felt like he had abused Jack's trust. Finally he had been allowed to explore a few things alone again, without being guarded all the time. He'd fought so hard to convince Jack and General Hammond that he was able to look out for himself and follow rules if they'd just give him the opportunity to prove it. So if the circumstances were safe, he could wander through a village or a temple of his own as long as he held radio contact and didn't leave the area he was supposed to be in. 

Daniel knew how hard it was for Jack to let him off the invisible leash. But Jack was trying to take a step back and give him some space to work. Now he had not only broken the rules, he had also lied and gotten away with it.

So far. 

And even though Daniel kept telling himself it wasn't a big deal since nothing had happened and it was really safe on this planet, he felt worse every minute.

Jack would be disappointed.

As if the colonel could read his thoughts, he asked, "You want to talk about it, Daniel?"

He shook his head.

Jack pulled him away from his shoulder and made him look up. "Just tell me you weren't in any trouble when you had your little exploration with Tink-ah. Can you do that?"

Daniel stared at him. Exploration? Did he already know? But how...

"I bet he showed you the whole village and explained every little cultural thingy to you, right?" Jack grinned and ruffled his hair.

He felt relief washing over him. Exploring the village. That was what Jack was talking about. "Yes he did. And no we didn't get into trouble," Daniel murmured.

And this was the truth somehow. All had gone well, nobody got hurt or lost. They had a great time. Just not in the village.

"Good. I can live with that. For now."

Jack hugged him again, then let him go and started to get up. "Will you be alright in here? Or do you want to come outside and walk with me?"

Since Daniel was a kid he wasn't supposed to do his own watches, but from time to time he shared Jacks or Teal'c's watch and walked with them. He loved those quiet walks through the nightly landscape. There was something peaceful about it.

But not tonight. Tonight he didn't want to be so close to Jack. It made him uncomfortable.

"I can sleep now, I guess. Thanks for waking me up."

"Hey no problem. Besides, how's a guy supposed to sleep when you're screaming like a banshee," Jack quipped, putting on his jacket.

**III**

O'Neill slapped his cap over his head and stretched his sore muscles as he left the tent. Sleeping on hard ground was getting worse each passing year and he wondered when the time would come where he longed for his own bed so much that he wanted to retire again or take a desk job. 

Not anytime soon, yet.

Carter handed him a hot mug of coffee and he made an approving noise in her direction.

"Teal'c said he'll take over your watch if you'd rather stay with Dani el," she offered.

"No it's okay. He's asleep again already. We have a kind of nightmare routine."

"Does he still have them that often?" She cradled her own coffee in her hand when they sat down at the fire. She had walked perimeters just a few minutes ago, so Jack could have his coffee first. O'Neill wasn't surprised to find T sitting there, too. 

"Is DanielJackson well again?"

"Yep. Sleeping like a baby. Go, get some rest, kids. I'm up now." Jack yawned.

Carter answered with her own yawn and nodded. "I’ll just finish my coffee."

"I am not in need of another kelno'reem for several hours. I can take over your watch, O'Neill."

"Nah, I'm awake anyway. You can keep me company if you like. But don't be cranky in the morning when junior wants you to do more kelno'reeming."

Teal'c raised his eyebrow at Jack. "I am never... cranky, O'Neill."

"Sure you are. When your blood pressure gets low and when you don't kelno'reem enough, you get cranky. Like when Daniel doesn't get his coffee fix. Or when Carter has hormonal... uh...."

"Sir!"

"I was not aware MajorCarter has hormonal difficulties," Teal'c said, curious.

"I don't have hormonal difficulties, Teal'c. I mean... have I? Honest? Sir?" Carter sounded puzzled and Jack grinned into his coffee. What a nice revenge for trying to let him eat seaweed for dinner.

"Well, Carter, there's that time of month when even Daniel thinks you can get very scary. Might not be hormonal. Could also be... something else, you know."

She slammed her coffee mug down to the ground and turned around. "I don't have PMS."

"I never said you have," Jack said , gazing at her with wide eyes.

"No, but you just said I'm getting hormonal. And that indicates me having PMS. And I have not."

Teal'c said, "I have read about thi s on the internet. Premenstrual syndrome is a disorder characterized by hormonal changes. Over 150 symptoms have been attributed to PMS. After complaints of feeling "out-of-control", anxious, depressed and having uncontrollable crying spells, the most common complaints are headache and fatigue."

Jack and Carter now both gaped at Teal'c, who kept his face stoic.

"May I ask… just out of curiosity… why you read up stuff like that?" Jack finally asked, not sure he really wanted to know.

"I heard Sgt. Siler talking about his wife having PMS to Walter. Walter's wife, however, seems to suffer the same symptoms. I overheard their conversation in the commissary and was curious. There are many aspects of the Tau'ri I have yet to learn about."

Jack blinked. "Walter?"

"The chevron guy," Carter grumbled.

"Oh. Walter."

"I also watched an Oprah show about this subject," Teal'c explained.

"There are Oprah shows about PMS?" Jack was really spooked now. All he'd wanted to do was make a bad joke and confuse Carter a little. Getting int o a serious discussion about PMS wasn't really high on his agenda.

"Indeed. I have learned many useful things about the Tau'ri psychology by watching several of your talk shows. There are many shows about how to raise difficult children on your TV," Teal'c continued.

Carter, obviously glad the subject had changed, chimed in, "Yes, I heard of those. People call the show for help if they have problems with their kids. They send a nanny to live with them for some time and help them to deal with their brats. And the whole thing is shown on TV. Something like that."

Jack poured himself another cup of coffee.

Teal'c bowed his head to confirm Carter's explanation about the show concept. "Many of the Tau'ri parents are not aware of the emotional state of their offspring or they are not capable of handling the children like they deserve, to satisfy their needs."

O'Neill knew a broad hint if it hit him. They didn't think he was that dense, did they? Maybe he should stop playing dumb from time to time just to remind them he di dn't make it colonel for his nice brown eyes. "Are you trying to tell me something here, T.?"

But the Jaffa didn't show a crack in his expression. "I was just making small talk about my favorite television shows, O'Neill. I enjoy watching Jell-O wrestling as well. And hockey."

"Ya think I should call the super nanny, T.? Carter?"

They were both supposed to hear the danger in his voice. But either they didn't hear it or they just ignored it.

Jack suspected the latter.

Carter emptied her coffee mug into the fire. "I think what Teal'c wants to say is that you're not alone here, sir. We are all Daniel's friends. If there's anything we can help you with – just say it."

He started to get to his feet. "Thanks, Carter. I'll handle it."

"But that's the point, sir. You don't have to handle it. Not alone. If you need time away from Daniel, let us take care of him for a couple of hours. Maybe it'll be good if the two of you don't hang around each other 24/7. I k now you're his best friend. But you don't have to carry this all on your shoulders. We are here. And we don't want to be shut out."

"Carter…"

"I agree with MajorCarter, O'Neill. There is no need to protect DanielJackson from his friends. At no time will he be in danger when he is in our company. You should be aware of that."

With a sigh, Jack sat down again between his teammates and friends. "It's not that I think you couldn't take care of Daniel," he began hesitantly.

"Then let us. I don't think he'd mind spending more time with us. He does it at work. When he was an adult we used to go out together, watch a movie or something. Why shouldn't we do it now? And you could just relax and stay home or do whatever you like," Carter encouraged him.

He rubbed his eyes. "Do I really look that bad?"

"With all due respect? Yes, you do – sir. And Daniel doesn't look really happy, either, if I might add."

"Daniel isn't happy. Daniel is pint-sized. He's not coping very well and apparently I'm not able to help him… very well… ah, crap."

There.

Out it was. 

And the world was still there.

Jack closed his eyes.

Carter's voice was soft when she replied, "That's not true, sir. I think you're helping him a bi g deal just because you're there for him. Daniel worships the ground you walk on. It had been like that be fore and it's still like that. But you need to let go sometimes so you both can get some rest from each other. Maybe all you need is a little time…"

Jack cut her off. "I know that, Carter. It's not that easy."

Teal'c said, "After the events at DanielJackson’s party, MajorCarter and I came to the conclusion you might be in need of assistance in the matter of raising our young friend."

"You were a little short tempered, that day," his oh-so-smart 2IC told him.

Jack stood and grabbed for his weapon. "I have to go," he snapped.

"Sir…"

Now he’d really had it. He spun around and exploded. "All right, Carter. You want me to draw you a picture? Fine! Here goes; he's got mood changes, is depressed and throws all his anger out at me. Daniel is an argumentative stubborn little brat. Whenever we have good days we'll have twice as many bad days. Then there are the nightmares or his brooding when he sits hours up in his tree house. And did I mention that he's still miles ahead of me in the argument business? This kid's sucking me dry like a sponge. Right now he's working up over something again and he isn't telling me. So I have to play twenty guesses tomorrow - again! Maybe you don't mind if I lose it from time to time!"

With that he stomped off, well aware of his two teammates staring after him open mouthed. Well, Carter's mouth would be open. Teal'c would just bow his head or raise an eyebrow and stay calm otherwise.

Jack hugged his weapon and walked at an angry pace along the campsite.

 

 

That went well.

Now, after the way he just yelled at them, they had to think he hated living with Daniel.

And that wasn't true.

He kicked a few small stones out of his way, satisfied when they hit a crippled tree and bounced off it.

Living with Daniel was like sitting in a roller coaster. Up and down and into one loop after another. Eight months since it had happened. Six months since he'd moved in with Jack. Considering the circumstances and the situation they were in, that wasn't that long. But it had been the longest eight months in Jack's life. And in Daniel's, too, as far as he was concerned.

Some days it was almost normal. Going to work and hanging out at home without major meltdowns and crisis. Nice and peaceful. They had good weekends, too, working in the yard or doing something together like going to a baseball game – which made Daniel complain and sulk even though Jack knew he didn't mind going. Or visiting a museum which made Jack complain and sulk even though he really didn't mind going there with Daniel, either. Those were things they had done together before  and t hey were still doing them and still enjoying them.

But the sunny days never lasted.

Sometimes it only needed a wrong joke or a wrong word at the wrong time and Daniel exploded or withdrew and the day was spoiled.

And Jack still had his own demons to fight.

From time to time anything could trigger memories… and Jack felt like he was grieving for a dead love. Then he looked at this kid that had once been a healthy very masculine 6-foot guy, and couldn't believe this was really Daniel.

Then again the kid was so much Daniel, it hurt. And just like his adult self, little Daniel didn't want to talk about any of this much. He was pretending all was fine until he couldn't pretend anymore and then he broke down.

And Jack O'Neill wasn't much of a talker, either. Even though he was trying to get Daniel to be more open. 

It was a big bad cosmic joke.

It sucked. 

When he reached camp again, Carter had gone to bed and Teal'c was still sitting at the fire. Jack didn't feel like talking to the big guy, so he just nodded and turned right back to do a second round.

When he returned, the Jaffa was gone too.

*******

Daniel woke up to the smell of instant coffee. 

When he yawned and blinked, he saw Jack's smiling face and the cup in his hand. "Wakey, wakey, sleeping beauty," the colonel sing-songed as he handed him the steaming mug. 

Daniel propped up on his elbows and yawned again. He carefully held the mug in his hands and blinked at his friend. "Thanks," he murmured.

"Your friend Tink-ah is waiting out there. Right now he's trying one of the MRE. And odd as it seems, he likes them."

Daniel sipped and rolled his eyes in bliss. Jack was really getting good at the coffee business lately. Even instant military coffee tasted wonderful if you weren't allowed to have too much coffee during the day. But when Daniel was fully awake, he remembered last night and suddenly the coffee didn't taste that good anymore.

"Tink-ah wants to take you on a walk." 

Daniel played with the zipper of his sleeping bag. "Can I go?"

He wanted to, but he was afraid of sounding too excited. And surely Jack was going to ask him about his nightmare now and then Daniel had to confess and then… But Jack didn't ask about the dream. He just checked his watch and said, "You can go after breakfast. But I want you to be back at lunch. And you better not forget to report on time."

Slowly, Daniel felt himself relax. "Yes, sir," he quipped. 

Jack rolled his eyes. "Smart ass."

Daniel smiled and started to crawl out of his sleeping bag. When he left the tent a few minutes later, he saw Tink-ah sitting cross-legged at the dying fire, digging a spoon into something that looked like apple pie.

Gared Baxter sat next to him, his own bowl with MRE resting on his knees. "Good morning, Daniel," he greeted him friendly. Daniel murmured a greeting back.

Tink-ah held up his apple pie and grinned. "Dan-el! This good! Sweet! You can come?"

"Hey, Tink-ah. I have to eat first, but then we can go." Daniel smiled and got his own apple pie from Teal'c, who was also having breakfast.

He wasn't really hungry, but choked down half of the pie to satisfy a certain colonel. He was eager to leave camp for several reasons. There was the cave that needed to be explored. And he wanted to avoid Jack today. Maybe if he managed to stay away a few hours, Jack forgot about Daniel's nightmare and never ask.

Daniel stopped eating when his stomach flipped. He put the plate down and grinned at Tink-ah. "Let's go. I have to be back for lunch."

But of course it wasn't that easy. Once Daniel had his radio attached to his jacket and checked his watch, Jack came over and did his commander-thing. "Listen, guys. I want you to stay near the village or the camp. No running or climbing in the mountains. You have four hours. How many times do you call me, Daniel?"

"Three."

"Right. And be back on time. If I have to sen d out a search party, I'll be very upset. That means you will go home and the fun is over."

Tink-ah looked nervous. "Can Dan-el go swim? I know where no danger. Water clean and no deep. Grown ** - ** ups watching."

After a moment of thinking, Jack nodded. "Swimming is okay, I guess. As long as you stay at a lake near the village."

"Yes. Near village. All children swim there," Tink-ah nodded eagerly.

Daniel could see Jack's inner fight to let them finally go. As they left  camp, Daniel swore to himself he wouldn't forget to report and that he'd be back exactly at lunchtime.

Moments later the boys were running through the wide canyon towards the village. Daniel liked the way his hair was blown out of his face and they started a little race. Tink-ah was very fast, jumping over little rocks or holes in the ground like a goat. But Daniel wasn't too slow either, and they were almost head-to-head when they reached the valley and the village came in sight.

"What to do, Dan-el? Go cave?" Tink-ah asked as they walked down a small path.

Daniel wasn't sure. He wanted to see the cave badly. But he'd been thinking about last night ever since he got up. He had to find a way to show his discovery to the others without giving away that he'd been there with Tink-ah before. He couldn't just tell SG-1 about the cave, because it would get his friend into trouble as well.

Daniel remembered the quote about one lie always generating more lies.

Now he knew what that meant.

It was like an unbreakable circle.

His reasonable mind was telling him the only way to get out of it was to either leave the cave alone and forget about what he'd seen there, or to go to Jack and tell him about it. And about the lie.

He let out a huge sigh.

Forgetting the cave was out of the question.

Not only was it an important discovery for the archaeological department of the SGC, but it was also something Daniel wanted to explore more. All he had done in the last few months since he'd been shrunk, were translations from artifacts other teams had brought home. Or, if he had been off-world, they only took him pla ces where other teams had been before. Here he was given the chance to work with something he found. And it was challenging him to dig deeper and find out as much as he could about the ‘little people‘. 

This planet was peaceful and, if he was real lucky, General Hammond would allow him to set up a dig site at the cave. The mere thought of that made Daniel's heart race and he felt enthusiastic like he hadn't felt in a very long time. He could write an article about the ‘little people‘. He would be able to study this culture.

And Doctor Gared-cooperative-Baxter wouldn't be part of his new dig site, if he had any say in it.

Well, if there would be a dig site.

Maybe Hammond sent him to kindergarten, once he heard about Daniel's disobedience. 

But if he didn't at least try, he'd never know.

That meant he'd talk to Jack this evening.

Daniel gulped.

Why was this haunting him so badly?

Jack was going to yell a lot, maybe smack his butt once, and probably send him home. But once they were back on base, Daniel would use his best reasoning skills on both, O'Neill and Hammond, to convince them to let him return. It had worked before. Daniel knew how to get through to them if he really wanted to.

Except he had lied to Jack. And that after he had accused him so harshly about not trusting him. He wanted Jack to know that he was reliable and could do his job without getting into trouble every other minute. And just now he'd thrown all warnings and rules in the wind and wandered off to have his own good time.

But nothing happened. Nothing changed, he tried to convince himself.

But he didn't feel any better. Maybe he should just, for once, do what Jack had told him. They'd be here for two more days... enough time to explore the cave later... 

"Can we go swimming?" he asked his friend.

"No cave?"

"Not yet. Maybe later."

They strolled alongside the village to a smaller lake.

When they reached the shore Daniel saw other kid s running in and out of the water. Women were sitting on the grass, sewing or knitting colorful blankets. Some of them were making grass baskets. They watched the children and talked amongst themselves in their fast paced, melodious language.

These people could speak broken English because they were traders and had met several other species who came through the Stargate to trade with them. But their native language wasn't anything Daniel had heard before and he wondered if he'd be able to learn it if he stayed long enough for Tink-ah to teach him.

 

Some of the women looked up from their work and greeted them cheerfully. They waved back and got rid of their clothes. Daniel wasn't exactly thrilled to swim naked like the other children, so he left his boxer briefs on. 

A minute later they were in the cool water, splashing and laughing. Daniel dove and searched for stones in the mud. When he came back up, he was holding an oddly shaped stone in his hands. It was bluish with some silver in it and looked almost like a crystal.

"Look what I found," he yelled at Tink-ah who was drifting on his back, watching the sky.

The native boy looked at the stone and smiled. "A stone."

"It's beautiful," Daniel replied. He held it up and it glittered and blinked in the sunlight. 

He swam back to the shore and left the water to put the stone into his jacket. When he reached his pile of clothes, he remembered to look at his watch and found it was time to make his call. Jack seemed to be pleased he remembered to report in, then whined a little about being bored and reminded Daniel to be careful.

Once he was back in the water, he dug for other stones and found red and green ones, all with the silver strings in them. 

Another hour later, he had a handful of stones in the pocket of his jacket. He reported back to Jack and then Tink-ah came out of the water, too. They lay on the soft grass and watched the sky while the sun dried their bodies. White clouds drifted above their heads. Daniel pointed up and said lazily, "This one looks like a big fat dragon."

"Cloud?"

“Yeah. Look at it. A fat dragon. And over there… That's a… a…"

"A mountain," Tink-ah suggested.

"No. More a house."

"Funny house."

They giggled.

"There bird," Tink-ah said looking at another cloud.

"Yes. And over there I can see… wow… this one looks like a cake. That means I'm hungry, I guess," Daniel sniggered.

Tink-ah laughed. "Let's go. Mother gives food."

They quickly put on their clothes and ran to the village to find Tink-ah's mom.

***

Jack eyed his MRE suspiciously.

Daniel had just called and asked if he could stay at Tink- ah's house for lunch. Apparently the boy's mother had invited Daniel and he couldn't decline such an offer, right? Of course not. And Jack had given his permission. So Daniel had fun and Jack had… Macaroni with meat or something like that. Well, it was better than seaweed, he guessed. 

When a shadow fell over him, he looked up and saw Car ter sitting down next to him. She sniffed and pulled a face. "Macaroni?"

"Yeah. Sweet."

"Didn't we have Macaroni yesterday?"

"Nope. Yesterday we had spaghetti."

"Oh. Can't see the difference."

They dug into their food without much enthusiasm for a while. Baxter had had his lunch some time ago and was already wandering around the temple again with the video camera to make sure he hadn't left out some spot.

"Do you understand that excitement over a black rock with chicken scratches on it?" Jack asked his 2IC.

As far too often, she took his question literally and started to explain. "Actually, sir, it's an interesting material. The walls, I mean. I wish I could take a sample of it. It's not Naquadah. It's a stone like material, but I have never seen anything like it before. The walls are so solid. I can't break off a piece with the tools we have here."

"Carter…"

"Sorry, sir. But don't you wonder what's inside? I mean, it's HUGE. Like a temple. But there are no doors. Only tiny little holes up there. Too little to be windows. They are too high to look into them. Maybe if I could kneel on Teal'c's shoulders, I could take a look."

Jack gazed up at the little round holes. "I don't know, Carter. What if there's something inside waiting for someone stupid to stick his nose into the holes?"

“True. But still.”

Jack took a sip from his canteen to wash down the macaroni. "Maybe there's one of those Ancient head suckers inside," he groused.

But Carter shook her blond head again. "No, sir. I don't think  so. It's not Ancient and not Asgard."

"From your mouth to Thor's ear, Carter," Jack grumbled.

She laughed, but then sobered again. "Sir, about last night…" 

"I know," he sighed.

"I didn't mean…"

Before Jack could say anything, Gared Baxter joined them to pour himself some coffee and take a break. The new scientist then involved Carter in a chat about his newest discoveries of the temple. 

Jack zoned out.

Teal'c was walking perimeters again and the colonel thought about joining him. There wasn't really much for him to do here, since there was no danger. Daniel was busy, too. Jack checked his watch to make sure the kid was still on time. He would call again in twenty minutes. After another minute of excited babbling from Carter and Baxter, Jack went off to take a leak and search for his big fellow.

Once he took care of business, he walked uphill  and found Teal'c sitting on the edge of a high cliff, overlooking the valley.

"I found this spot very calming," the Jaffa said without turning around. 

No matter how skilled O'Neill was in sneaking up on people, Teal'c always heard him.

Jack sat down, taking in the view. He could see the village. Two dozen little loam houses with roofs of grass and the gathering place in the middle. There was smoke coming out of some of the chimneys. To his left were two lakes. One of them was small and the other much bigger.

"It's a nice place," Jack agreed.

"This planet appears to be very peaceful, O'Neill. There is no threat on this world."

"Yeah. No snake heads or wild tribes for a change. Just the right place to bring Daniel and let him have some fun," Jack agreed thoughtfully.

"I agree. But it is important to follow our original path. Fighting the false gods. Destroying the Goa'uld. SG-1 must go back into battle as soon as possible."

"Have patience, big fella. We are on our way back into the battlefield. You think Baxter is a good man?"

Teal'c didn't answer at once. When he finally spoke, his voice didn't give anything away. "GaredBaxter has yet to prove himself in battle. I prefer to have DanielJackson by my side. He has proven himself many times. "

"Yeah, well, that might take a few years now," Jack muttered.

"DanielJackson is still strong and has advantages in a fight. I could train him to fight even now that he is a boy. If you allow me to help DanielJackson to learn new fighting techniques, he might be ready to join SG-1 in battle in less than four years."

"Daniel isn't Jaffa, Teal'c," Jack objected tersely.

"That is true. But he could learn to fight like Jaffa. All Jaffa children learn how to fight at a very early age. DanielJackson will be able to learn to hold his ground in battle. There are several ways to defeat the enemy. Even if it is only done in self defense."

"Teal'c..."

"Would you not be less worried about DanielJackson’s well being if you knew that he could defend himself even without a weapon?"

"Well, he learned a thing or two from you and me over the years and he did the required self defense programs...” Jack started, but Teal'c interrupted him.

"The techniques of the Tau'ri might be effective. But I am able to teach young DanielJackson many more ways. He has to accept his new physical state first. Then he will be able to find a stable base in his mind and will learn how to use his lighter weight and the gravitation of his body to his advantage."

Maybe the Jaffa was right after all. He was already working out with Daniel at the gym to help him get rid of some of his tension. It wouldn't hurt anybody if the kid knew how to kick ass if he had to.

"Let's ask Daniel," Jack decided finally.

Teal'c bowed his head in agreement.

  
  


That evening they had cheese sandwiches and some red instant powder which turned out to be hot tomato soup. 

Baxter sighed and watched the steaming dishwatery liquid pour from his spoon back into the mug. "If I miss anything about home, it's the food."

"Yep. And beer. And my couch. And the Simpsons," Jack agreed, melancholy in his voice.

"I miss a hot tub with bubbles," Carter confessed, rubbing her fingers through her straggly hair. 

"The lakes are cool. The water is almost warm," Daniel suggested, stifling a yawn.

"I know. But it's not the same as a hot tub with bubbles," Carter insisted.

"Showers," Jack said. Oh yeah. Hot, hard water streaming down to loosen his sore and tight back muscles. All the sleeping in the tent... "My bed," he added longingly.

"I like it here. It's like vacation," Daniel said softly, looking at his hands in his lap. This planet did him good. He sported a nice tan. And his blond hair had gotten lighter from the sun.

"It is most satisfying to see you relaxing and enjoying your stay on this planet, DanielJackson," Teal'c said in his calm deep voice and one of the very rare smiles lightened up his dark face.

"Thank you, Teal'c," Daniel answered.

Baxter suddenly asked between two spoonfuls of soup, "H as anyone  seen the video cam? I wanted to take a couple more videos this evening. I found some bone fragments not far from the temple and wanted to get them on camera before I put them away. But the camera seems to be gone. I thought I put it in my pack, but it's not there."

SG-1 shook their heads in union. 

Baxter sighed. "Daniel, did you take the camcorder with you when you went back to Tink'ah this afternoon?"

"No."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Then we’re having a problem," Baxter said, embarrassed. "I can't believe I lost the camera. It is just luck I changed the tape this morning. So most of the footage is on the other tape in my backpack. But I did some interesting recordings later this morning, too. If I don't find the camera, they are lost."

"Yep. And you lost some expensive equipment without bein g in battle or any dangerous situation. Those who cut our budget each year are gonna have a fit over that one," O'Neill said, not too pleased. Equipment was expensive and they couldn't afford to lose it. Not on a nice, quiet planet as this. He was beginning to reconsider his choice regarding Baxter.

Baxter shook his head. "I really don't know how this could have happened. I'll look for it again by daylight tomorrow. I can't find anything out there in the dark."

"I'll help you search for it," Carter offered.

Jack broke his sandwich into half and held one part out to his kid. But Danny shook his head without looking up. "I'm not hungry, really. I had lots of lunch at Tink-ah's."

"Just a few bites. Humor me, will ya?"

"Jack..." The kid sighed, then took the bread and started chewing on it half heartedly. After three tiny bites he put it down on Jack's plate. "Sorry."

"Hey," Jack put a hand to Daniel's head, feeling his temperature, "you okay? You're a little warm. Maybe you better go to bed. Was a long day with all the swimming and stuff."

"Yes, maybe." Daniel rose and nodded a good night to his other teammates. Then he tugged at the collar of Jack's green jacket. "Could you...?"

Jack nodded and followed the kid into their tent where Daniel went straight to his sleeping bag and sat down with slumped shoulders, head lowered, hands absently playing with the laces of his black boots.

He wasn't a happy camper. In fact he looked plain miserable.

Jack crouched on his own sleeping bag and waited.

And waited some more.

Daniel made no effort to get undressed or to speak.

Jack considered making some smart remark, but decided against it. Just looking at the kid made him feel sorry for him. And maybe it was good Jack felt that way, because Daniel looked as though he was in some serious trouble.

On the other hand, who knew? He could just feel sick. M aybe an upset stomach from the native food he had for lunch. He looked a little pale and his head had been a little warm. Or perhaps he was just sad. Daniel had these melancholy phases from time to time. Something could have triggered any memory and... boom.

Jack gave it a try. "Daniel?"

"I... I don't feel so good," he said in a hushed voice.

"Are you going to be sick?"

Daniel swallowed and shook his head. "No, I am fine. Just tired."

He pulled off his boots and crawled into his sleeping bag, turning onto his side, facing away from O'Neill.

Okay. This was NOT a good sign.

What could possibly have happened to leave him so gloomy and miserable? He'd been talking a mile a minute when he’d come back from the village after lunch. Jack had been so impressed with Daniel's high spirits this afternoon, he had sent him back to play with that native little boy again, later. 

Jack had thought this was maybe what Danny needed. To get out of the mountain more often. To have someone his current age to hang out with. Daniel might be an adult mind in a kid’s body, but part of him really was seven. And perhaps, here, he could let go of Doctor Jackson and just be Daniel for a while. 

Baxter had done great on his own with the exploring of the temple and the digging he had started, searching for some artifacts. He didn't need Daniel's assistance the whole day. And Daniel had strolled off happily. He had reported on time every hour and came back before dinner. Everything seemed to be just peachy. 

And now this.

Jack stared down at the little form in the sleeping bag for a moment. Then he very carefu lly lay down next to him and put his arms around Daniel in a hopeful attempt to comfort him. If Danny pushed him away he'd leave. But he'd at least try. The kid stiffened under his touch. When he didn't relax after a moment, Jack withdrew and sat up again. 

Rubbing his hand over his face, he finally said, "Daniel, I really need some help here. Can't you just … you know… talk to me?"

The blond head burrowed deeper into the sleeping bag.

"Are you mad at me?"

After a long while, there was a soft, "No."

"Okay. That's something. You think I should be mad at you?"

Daniel sighed. Then he turned around and blinked at him. Only his blue eyes and the tip of his nose peeking out of the sleeping bag. Despite the very bad premonition sneaking up on him, Jack thought it was unbelievable cute.

"Um, Jack… Can I… tell you tomorrow?"

Jack felt the bad feeling grow. "Why tomorrow?"

"Because?"

"Daniel.”

"Jack.”

"Sit up so I can see your face," Jack demanded, getting a little impatient now 

"Um, I feel good like this," the kid mumbled.

"No games, remember? Sit up and spill."

Daniel's head emerged from the thick garment as he sat up and gave Jack the big blue baby eyes. Why did the kid fight with such unfair weapons? "I promise I'll tell you tomorrow, okay? No games. I just have to think something through first."

"Well, I'm not sure I shouldn't press this… but okay. Tomorrow it is then."

"Thanks, Jack," the kid sighed and sank back down. 

O'Neill cupped his face with one hand. "You sure, you're okay?"

Daniel closed his eyes. "I 'm sorry. Good night, Jack."

"I'm outside, taking first watch… just in case you need anything," Jack offered.

Daniel nodded and turned away from him once more. With one last sigh, Jack put on his cap and left the tent.

**IV**

As soon as Jack had left, Daniel opened his eyes and sat up once more. He swallowed the bile rising in his throat. He was such a coward. And as if that wasn't bad enough, he also was a thief now. And of course a liar. He stared into the darkness of the tent, wondering how everything could've gone so terribly wrong.

He really had had a good plan to end all this.

When Jack had allowed him to go with Tink-ah again in the afternoon, he had the wonderful idea to take the video camera and tape everything in the cave. Just in case Jack was going  to send him home and they wouldn't allow him to come back after he'd confessed about wandering off and lying.

With the video he'd have some footage to work with at least. 

So he had gone to ask Baxter for the camera. But Gared hadn't been at the temple or his dig area. Daniel found Baxter's open backpack lying there and he'd spotted the video camera in it. Without giving it a second thought, Daniel had pulled the camera out and took it with him. He'd put the cam back tonight and tell Baxter he'd taken it. After all, the camera wasn't Gared's. It was SGC equipment and Daniel had a right to use it. 

So Daniel had gone to meet Tink-ah at the village. They had made their way to the cave and Daniel started taping. All had gone well. He had managed to call the camp every hour as he was supposed to. Jack didn't ask too many questions about what the boys were doing, so he hadn’t been forced to tell too many lies. But it had still bugged him that he couldn't just tell him where he was and what he was doing. 

Shortly before it had been time to go back, the boys decided to take a break and swim for a while. There was a sandy beach at this side of the lake and s o Daniel had left his journal and the camera at the entrance of the cave in his backpack before they went swimming. Then time had been running by so fast, they almost forgot to row back on time. They had panicked, jumped into the boat and rowed back in a hurry.

It was only long after Daniel had been back to camp that he realized he’d forgotten his backpack at the cave. With the video camera in it. 

And if he told Jack now that not only had he lied  and wandered off twice, but had also taken the video camera from Baxter’s backpack and then left it somewhere in the middle of nowhere, he'd be toast. Dead. 

So Daniel had to go back to that damn cave and get his pack. 

Tomorrow he could talk to Jack and get rid of this sick feeling in his g ut. Right now he would accept every nasty consequence if it meant to breathe freely again. He should've told Jack right away that he was going to leave the village with Tink-ah. Why hadn't he don e that? What horrible thing could have possibly happened to him? Jack would have ordered him back to the feast and then Daniel could have convinced him they had to go to that cave to explore. 

Why hadn't he thought about this earlier? 

Baxter and Sam would have been happy to support his request, no matter what Jack would've said. Daniel groaned inwardly. No. He had to do it his own way, running over all red lights. And now he was mixed up in a bunch of lies and had stolen the damn video camera – and then lost it. What a mess. And on top of it all he was about to sneak out of camp at night, which meant he was breaking another major rule. And all that because he couldn't bring himself to confess right away and tell Jack everything. 

But he couldn't. 

He'd get his things, give Baxter back the video cam and apologize for borrowing it without asking. This wasn't the best of solutions, but it was the only one he could think of right now. He had to fix at least his last screw up first. They would never allow him to go anywhere alone again, if they found out he had lost his equipment on top of everything.

And there was the issue of Jack getting into trouble because he was responsible for Daniel and if Daniel screwed up, Jack was going to take at least part of the blame for not keeping him in line. 

He wasn't sure what was the worst part of all this. The knowledge that all of this would go straight into Jack's and his own report or that he had to face Hammond, who wouldn't be happy at all about Doctor Jackson's latest adventure. He'd better not be too eup horic about getting his own dig site or returning to this planet anytime soon.

When they had been both adults, he had often thought of Jack's behavior towards him as "the alpha male thing." It had annoyed him to no end, but it was how Jack showed his affection best. And Daniel had picked his fights and when he had known he was right or Jack was overdoing it, he had stood his ground very well. He had never been a submissive kind of guy and a Jack O'Neill wouldn't change that. So they had fought it out. But they had always done it with honesty even though it had hurt sometimes.

Now…

Now Daniel had chosen the easy way out and pretended to follow Jack's lead while h e'd been doing the opposite all the time. He had avoided a fight because he'd thought his actions wouldn't hurt anyone and not telling the truth would just serve to keep Jack calm and relaxed. Only Daniel had been wrong about all of it. He hurt so badly and he'd hurt Jack as well. And that was the worst part. 

He wiped away tears as he crawled out of his bag and dressed quickly. Then he peeked out of the tent. Jack's watch lasted four hours. Afterward he'd have another coffee or a bite to eat. Daniel would be back before the colonel returned to the tent. 

He heard his heart pounding so loud, he was surprised no one else was hearing. He wiped his sweaty hands on his pants.

Jack was just getting up from the fire to go on his first walk. Daniel watched the tall figure leave camp. He tried to remember his route and came to the conclusion that Jack would go north first. That meant he'd reach the border of the plateau within the next five minutes. Daniel had to wait until Jack reached the temple. Daniel squinted at his watch and made a rough estimation on when he would be there. 

Ten minutes later, Daniel slipped out of the tent. 

Nobody was sitting by the fire, so he was lucky and got away. Soon the shadows of the mountain swallowed him as he was on his way down to the village. Realizing he had held his breath he sucked up a lung full of air and ran faster. 

He didn't know how he made it to the lake and into the boat. He couldn't row as fast as Tink-ah, but he managed to set the little ship over without a hitch. His arms were aching and he was exhausted by the time he finally got to the cave. His backpack was at the same spot where he had left it. With a sigh of relief, he picked it up and was on his way back. 

When he was rowing again, he couldn't go as fast as before. He had to take a break in the middle of the lake. Daniel suddenly felt very lost and alone. While the boat was small, probably made especially for Tink-ah, the paddles were heavy enough to make Daniel's arms and shoulders groan in protest. The village was still far away and the lights of house-fires seemed like little torches in the night. 

He grabbed the paddles again and gritted his teeth. 

Once he pulled the boat back up the shore, Daniel shouldered his pack and started running again. He checked his watch and realized he'd been away almost two hours already. He had underestimated the time and needed so much longer to cross the lake without Tink-ah. 

He started walking the path leading to the campsite, when all of a sudden a flashlight blinded his eyes.

"Daniel?" Sam emerged from the darkness, grabbing his shoulders. "Daniel! Thank god! Where the hell have you been ~~ ! ~~ " She gave him a brief hug, then activated her radio to inform the colonel and Teal'c.

"Is he all right?" Jack's voice exploded out of the receiver.

"I think so. Are you okay, Daniel?"

"Yes. I'm fine."

"Where are you, Carter?" 

"I met him on the way to the village, sir."

"Get back to camp." With that the radio went silent. 

Sam put a hand on Daniel's shoulder and steered him in the direction of the camp. They walked in uneasy silence for a moment, before she finally asked, "What were you doing out there, Daniel?"

"I lost something this afternoon and wanted it back," he stated qu ietly.

"Couldn't it wait until morning?"

"No. Sam…" He stopped walking and turned around to meet her face in the dark. She brought up her flashlight so they could look at each other. Daniel fought back the tears stinging in his eyes. "I screwed up. And I don't know what to do. I took the video camera because I found this great cave, and…" And with that it all broke out of him like water from a bursting damn. 

Sam listened and, when he finally finished, shook her head. "Daniel, I don't know what to say to all this. You've gotten yourself into a fine mess here. Why didn't you just tell us? I mean… this might be a great find and Doctor Baxter would be interested in it, too. But why the lies? And why did you take the camera without telling? Don't you know I would've supported you if you wanted  to explore that cave? You just had to tell us about it from the start, and we could've gone there together. The colonel would have agreed to it."

“ I know. And I don't know why I didn't tell. I… It was… I'm so sorry," was all he could say, his voice trembling. God, he really sounded like a baby.

"Well, you'll have to deal with Colonel O'Neill. And believe me, Daniel, he's not happy. To be honest, he is royally pissed right now. If you tell him everything you've told me…."

"He's going to kill me," Daniel sighed.

"He was beyond worrying. Daniel, we've been searching for you nearly two hours now. He was blaming himself for leaving you alone, instead of trying to get through to you. He asked me to take over his watch when he came back form his first round, because he wanted to stay with you, since you didn't feel well. Once he found out you were gone we went to the village and informed the chief. We thought you might have gone to visit your new friend. But Tink-ah didn't know anything. Kink-ah and three of his men are searching the lakes and plateaus right now."

"Oh, shit."

"You can say that again. What were you thinking?"

"I guess I didn't think at all," he whispered.

"Oh, boy." Sam sighed as they started walking again. After a moment, she suddenly asked, "Did you get good footage from the cave?"

Despite the fate he was about to face, Daniel had to smile. Always the scientist, good old Sam. "Oh, yes. It's pretty good. Maybe it's so good, it'll keep me from getting grounded for the rest of my life by Hammond."

"I think Hammond will get over it. I'm not so sure, the colonel will," Sam murmured.

"I know how to get into the temple," Daniel said.

"Really? How?" Now there was definitely some excitement in her voice.

"You have to crawl into the holes. The people were very little, so they didn't build big entrances or anything. It was good to keep enemies at bay."

"How did they get up there? Those holes are pretty high from the ground,"

"They used ropes. It's all on the drawings in that cave."

"We have to put in a request to stay here longer," Sam said thoughtfully.

At this point they had entered the campsite. Daniel could see Baxter, Teal'c and Jack standing by the fire. He felt Sam's hand on his arm as they joined them and Daniel was very grateful for the support.

Jack crouched in front of him and grabbed his shoulders. “Daniel, are you okay? Do you hurt anywhere?”

He shook his head, unable to say any thing. Even in the dark he could see Jack exhaling a long breath of relief before he stood again and took a step back. “Well, then I guess you have some explaining to do. And it better be damn good.” 

For a moment the adults just looked at him expectantly. When Daniel didn't say anything right away, Teal'c took his staff and said, "I will inform ChiefKink-ah that we found DanielJackson." 

With that the Jaffa left. Baxter didn't say anything. He just nodded in their direction and went to his tent. But Daniel called after him. He had to start to apologize somewhere. When the anthropologist turned, Daniel put his pack down and retrieved the camera from it. "I'm sorry. I took it with me and forgot to bring it back. But it's in one piece and all footage is still there. I know I should have told you." He handed the cam to Baxter, who took it, a surprised look on his face.

"Thank you, Daniel. I'm glad you got it back in one piece," Gared said, not unkindly.

"There’s some new footage on it. I filmed the walls of a cave this afternoon," Daniel added.

Sam, who was still standing behind him, chimed in. "Sir, Daniel might have found some very interesting things."

"I don't want to hear it," Jack snapped.

Daniel swallowed the lump in his throat. All of a sudden he realized how little he was compared to Jack, who was looming over. "So. Spill."

"Um… can we go… in the tent?"

“Why, Daniel? I think we're all interested to hear why you snuck out in the middle of the night and let us search for you for two fucking hours," Jack said sarcastically.

"It's… a long story."

"And? So? Therefore?"

Daniel closed his eyes for a second and then started to explain. He told them everything, started with the feast and his first lie and ended where he went out to get the video camera back. Nobody interrupted him.

When he was finished, he stared down at his boots and waited for the storm to break loose.

Baxter murmured, "Kids…"

Sam sighed. 

Jack said, "Get in the tent."

  
  


Daniel sank on his sleeping bag and waited for Jack. He took off his jacket and dusty boots and thought about lying down. He was so tired. His arms ached from rowing and his head was pounding. But he was too anxious and felt like throwing up as he turned on the oil lamp.

When the tent flaps were pulled away and Jack entered, Daniel could see his friend’s face properly for the first time. He had seen Jack outraged and mad before. Now the colonel seemed to hold back his anger behind a mask of stone. There was no emotion on his face; his eyes were dark and his lips set into a thin tight line.

"I'm sorry, Jack," was all Daniel could think of. He didn't know what else to say. Even this must sound like a phrase.

"I should have known you wouldn't go with that kid to simply play. Well, for the record, you got damn lucky. Nobody's hurt, the camera is back and we didn't order back-up, yet," Jack said coldly and sat down on his own sleeping bag.

"I'll take the full blame. I'll write all of it into my report," Daniel explained. He had been a coward long enough. This wasn't like him and he wouldn't tell any more lies to anybody. To his surprise, Jack shook his head.

"No, you're not."

"What?"

"Hammond's going to ground you forever. Lying to your commander isn't exactly a good idea, no matter if you're thirty four or seven. If you were military I could put you on trial for this."

"What… do you want me to write then?"

"We'll see."

Daniel cringed. Jack's face was still a mask of coldness and his eyes were like stones. 

"But… but I thought you wanted Hammond to ground me. I was sure that you… wouldn't want me on the team anymore."

"Well, we have to report you disobeying orders and running off in the middle of the night to get the camera back. That might get you grounded for a few weeks but at least you'll get back to gate travel someday. It's a team thing, though. But if they agree with me, I won't mention the lies."

Daniel stared at Jack, not believing what he just heard. "You mean, you won't tell Hammond?"

"Nope. Not this time."

"Wh… why?"

There was a first crack in O'Neill’s voice and face when he blurted out, "Why do you think, Doctor Jackson? Because I know - against all odds – it's important to have you out there. Because you are still one of the damn best civilian consultants this program has. I know your work is the only thing that keeps you sane right now.”

Daniel felt the heat rise in his cheeks. He was so ashamed. He had thought Jack didn't understand him, didn't see further than his overprotective streak... didn't take him seriously anymore..Oh god, this was bad. 

“ Crap, Daniel, I don't know! I'd feel much better if I knew you were sittin g on base, safe and sound – but it would be such a waste. And you'd make my life more misera ble than you already do."

Daniel still felt like he was going to be sick. Hugging himself, he worked his bottom lip between his teeth. "But I…I lied to you. And I know I'm making your life miserable and I'm sorry. Maybe I'm…I'm… just a head-case."

Jack rubbed his eyes and Daniel saw how tired he looked. How old. There were more gray hairs and more lines around Jack's mouth. Daniel wished he could hug him, comfort him. But he couldn't. Once again he was aware how it was always Jack now who did the comforting. He was always there for Daniel… and who was there for Jack? Daniel blinked away tears. They used to be the best of friends and now Daniel couldn't even be that for  Jack anymore. He was just so mixed up, nothing but a burden and now he was a liar and a coward, too. 

What a great start to growing up again.

Jack said quietly, “We're all making mistakes out here, Daniel. None of us is free from making the wrong choices once in a while. Not because we're careless or stupid, but because we're dealing with unexpected, unknown situations. We touch things that blow up in our faces, get trapped in some alien force field because we simply didn't know it's there. We say the wrong thing to people and get shot at... In the end it's my responsibility to get all of you home safe and see to it that the job gets done right. We can't get the job done without touching things, without exploring and without talking to people. No matter how much I want to tie your hands behind your back sometimes. Or Carter's. And I do know that, sometimes, you have to go against my orders to do the right thing.” Jack paused before he added, “But that's not what happened here, right?”

Daniel hung his head. “No,” he whispered. 

"Why did you lie to me, Daniel?"

There was so much pain in the older man's voice that the boy couldn't hold back his tears anymore. 

"I… don't know. It just happened. You always worry and try to protect me, and… we had a good time here. I didn't want to fight. If I'd told you about the cave, you would've been mad because I left the village… and… and… we were good since we came here. I wanted it to stay that way. I thought it wouldn't harm anyone to go with Tink-ah and if you never knew, you wouldn't have to worry and… and it all got out of hand suddenly. I'm sorry."

"I want you to be happy," Jack said slowly. "I also want you to be safe. But I learned a long time ago that I can't have both. And having you safe and unhappy isn't working. So if being happy for you means to do your job and go out there to explore and dig, I'll be there to watch your little butt 24/7. If it means I have to pull you out of some shit by your ears, I'll do it. It bugs the hell out of me, but I'll do it. I would've been mad, yes. But you know in the end I would've agreed to go to your happy place and let you work. And since Carter is already excited about it… we'll check it out tomorrow."

"Even… after…?"

"Yes, Daniel. Even after you screwed up."

"But… but aren't you pissed? Shouldn't you send me home? I mean, not that I'm complaining here… um… I feel like an idiot. Sorry."

"I am pissed, Daniel. So what's new? I'll live. And you'll live with the fact that you're not 6 feet tall anymore. So, I'm gonna deal with it this time. But the next time you lie to me, I'll send you home in a heartbeat and make sure Hammond's gonna ground your ass for good."

Oh.

"So this is a second chance?"

"Because I know you're not a liar," Jack said. "Because I know you feel like crap about Baxter taking your place for the tough missions. You don't think this is about jealousy? That maybe you didn't want to share your little secret right away with us, because of Baxter?"

"I… I… maybe. I don't know. Wouldn’t that be really childish?" Daniel blushed. How much more embarrassing could it get? How much more bad was he going to feel about this? 

"Ya think?"

"Um, yeah. Stupid. I mean… a kid might behave like that, but… I shouldn't. Right?"

"Remember I told you I'd treat you like a five year old from now on if you behave like one? Well, it seems like we have a situation here," Jack said, raising his eyebrows at him.

"Um… yeah… so… you are going to…" Daniel swallowed, hard. 

"Damn straight I will."

Somewhere deep inside he had known it would come to this in the end. They gazed at each other silently for a moment. Daniel felt the urge to fight this, no matter how bad he felt about his behavior. But he was so exhausted and part of him just wanted to get it over with. He had received smacks before. Part of him was relieved he was getting off the hook so relatively easy this time. 

So why was he still feeling guilty? They sorted this out. Jack wouldn't bite his head off and they were handling this off record. He got lucky.

“Lie down on your belly."

This was odd. Normally Jack would just grab him, deliver one or two s macks and let him go. Gritting his teeth Daniel stretched out on his front on top of his sleeping bag. He put his face down into the soft thick garment and tried to ignore the flip-flops of his stomach. He heard the rustling of clothes next to him, then he felt one of Jack's hands on his back, holding him down.

Jack's voice wasn't even angry, when he asked, "Do we have to establish why you're getting spanked, Daniel?"

He felt his face flush with heat when he shook his head.

Jack patted his back. "How old are you, Danny?"

"Thirty… thirty… four." But he didn't feel like that right now. He felt childish and silly. Oh, he remembered feeling like this when his parents had to punish him. It hadn't happened often, but as most kids, Daniel had had his share of trouble when he'd been little the first time around. Closing his eyes, he whispered, "Seven."

"That's seven for wandering off and another seven for lying and stealing the camera then.”

Daniel's head jerked up. “Fourteen?” he squeaked, unable to hold himself back.

“You want me to add another seven for running off in the middle of the night?”

“I... I... no... I mean... It's your call.” He let his face drop back onto the sleeping bag. 

“You'll get grounded for that one for a while. I'm going to make sure of it."

“Yes, sir,” Daniel said timid, not in jest this time. Jack meant business and he was going to dish out. And Daniel was fully aware he deserved it.

Yet, after the first couple of smacks he tried to squirm away and sit up. 

“Oh no, you don't,” the colonel snapped, holding Daniel firmly in place. 

The steady sound of Jack's hand smacking his butt seemed unnaturally loud in the enclosed space of their tent. Halfway through, Daniel was sobbing and all thoughts of taking this like a man had vanished. When the last two smacks were delivered, he was crying like a baby into his sleeping bag. How could it hurt that much? And did it really hurt that much? Or was he just feeling so guilty that he felt more into it? Jack couldn't possibly have spanked him that hard. He was still wearing his BDU, but his butt felt like it was on fire.

So was his face; burning in shocked embarrassment as he almost choked on his sobs. He wanted to scream at Jack that he hated him... wanted to be mad... how dare he... But the anger was only short ** - ** lived when Jack pulled him up into a sitting position and their eyes met again. 

There was nothing but sad weariness in Jack's and that was almost worse than the spanking. Daniel wiped the tears off his face, but new ones were coming. 

“I'm sorry,” he choked out.

“C'mere,” Jack said gently. 

Then Daniel was hugged and held. 

Calloused hands stroked his hair and upper back. Daniel was clinging to Jack as hot and salty tears were spilling on the green jacket. It was like all of his bad feelings were pouring out of him. The guilt, the anger towards Baxter, everything. Daniel felt like he couldn't stop crying, ever. And it felt scary, and good at the same time. And Jack wouldn't send him home and he wouldn't pull him from the team. 

"Are you planning on flooding the tent?" 

"I… I'm sorry. I can't… s… stop." 

"So you're crying for both of us here, I guess." Jack tightened his arms around him, rocking gently.

"This is g… getting r… eal old," Danie l hiccupped.

"What?"

"Me… me ruining your clothes with my snot."

“Yeah, well, I'll live."

"I… I can't even take a little spanking… without bawling like a… baby," Daniel sniffled, rubbing his face at Jack's shoulder.

"Wasn't so little. And you do have some pretty good reasons to cry from time to time. Being what you are isn't… easy to deal with."

"I think what you just did should feel wrong. I should be mad at you," Daniel whispered, when there were finally no tears left in him.

"Are you? Mad at me?"

“It hurt,” Daniel sniffed, still not entirely sure how he felt about it. “It _really_ hurt this time.” He squirmed, resisting the urge to rub his throbbing backside.

He felt Jack's face pressing against his hair and heard the agony in his friend's voice when he said, "I know, Daniel. I know. But what am I going to do with you, huh? You have any idea how I felt when I came back to the tent and you were gone?” 

“I...”

“I need to trust you. I need to know you know your limits. I need you to follow the rules, you agreed to. You can't do this, Daniel. And if your adult side isn't listening and your kid side is screwing up... then I'll answer to your kid side first."

Daniel didn't want to hear any of this. He squeezed his eyes shut, shaking his head. “No!”

“Yes!”

“Nooo...”

Jack pushed him away, grabbing his chin and tilting his face upwards. “Look at me,” he ordered.

Daniel sniffed, but slowly opened his eyes and blinked at Jack's face. 

“I'm not going to spank you on a regular basis. But if you ever lie to me again, no matter if off world or anywhere else, I will do it again. I can't let this happen. And it will take some time for me to trust you again."

 

 

It was all it took  f o r Daniel  to falter and crumble into himself. “I'm sorry,” he whispered. “I won't lie to you again, I promise.” 

"I think I know why you did it though." Jack let go of Daniel, who snuggled back against him, feeling tired and exhausted. "Maybe if I could take things a little more relaxed, could let you loose more easily, you would've never felt the need to lie to me." 

"It's no excuse," Daniel murmured. 

“No it's not. I'm just trying to understand what's going on in your head. Not that I ever could. But right now it's more complicated than ever,” Jack sighed. 

“ I don't know what's going on in my own head most of the time.” 

Jack squeezed the nape of Daniel's neck. “You know, I…I care for yo u, Daniel. I don't want anything happen to you." 

"I know." Daniel yawned and turned around so his back was against J ack's chest. He tipped his head and looked up at the man who was keeping him sane every day. Oh yes, he knew. Nobody had ever cared for him so deeply. He was very close to saying, "I love you." But he didn't. They never said that since… somehow it was a taboo to say it. They both knew but never said it. Maybe because "I love you" had meant a whole different thing once.

***

Jack knew it was late. They were both drained and the kid needed sleep. But he didn't let him go just yet, feeling they both needed the connection for a little while longer.

He was worried and hurt. Daniel had never lied to him like this before. It was something Jack had a hard time dealing with. He knew this issue wasn't out of the way with a couple of smacks to the kid's rear. They needed to sort this out and move on somehow. And Jack had to make sure it wouldn't happen again. 

Because Daniel was his responsibility and Jack had to keep him in line. 

Hammond was a good man with a big heart. The general had saved Jack's ass from court martial more than once. But Daniel's state of being had caused the Air Force enough trouble  already. The reason he was allowed to go off world was only due to the fact that Hammond – along with everybody else at the SGC who knew Daniel Jackson – had a very soft spot for SG-1's archeologist. Hammond and Fraiser had vouched for Daniel and fought the battles. And Jack would stick his neck out for him, too. Daniel was worth it. They all knew that.

That he’d almost spoiled this privilege with this stupid stunt was disgusting. So Jack had to do something. And it seemed like a good idea at the time to just spank him.

But was it really?

Maybe he should tell Hammond all about it and let him deal with Daniel. Being grounded for the next couple of years probably taught him a much harsher lesson than being spanked. 

And hadn't Jack – again - forced his friend into the role of something he wasn't? This was Daniel, for crying out loud. Strong minded, argumentative, highly skilled and  a free spirit.

Yet...

Danny had accepted his punishment like a seven year old might have under the same circumstances. Jack tried to remember if Charlie had ever lied to him or done something he could compare this to. Had he ever spanked Charlie? Jack thought that he had threatened him a couple of times and maybe had given him the same warning smacks Daniel had had received before. Charlie had been a great kid. And after he had died, Jack tended only to remember the happy days. 

He hadn't been able to protect Charlie. And he had left his gun loaded at home… he had screwed up back then. Was this the reason he couldn't stop being so overprotective with Daniel? Because he hadn't been able to save Charlie and he wouldn't allow it to happen again? That he couldn't bear to lose another friend or lover or kid because he wouldn't survive it one more time?

Jack stared down at the little body in his arms. Daniel had snuggled into his embrace and was asleep now. What a fine pair they were. The mixed up pint-sized genius and the moody old guy.

The brat from hell and his bitching colonel.

God.

He loved Daniel. Loved him so damn much.

But maybe it was time to face the fact they needed some help here. That they wouldn't get through this alone, without losing their sanity along the way. No matter how hard they tried. There would always be too many issues, too many unspoken things between them. If they were going to work this out and stay together in any way, they needed someone from outside who could help them to move on.

Jack settled down with Daniel in his arms. And while he tried to get over the scary realization that he seriously considered talking to a shrink, he fell asleep.

  
  



	2. Off World Trouble - The Cave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daniel gets to check out his cave and Jack is considering a couple of decisions he has to make...

* * *

**The Cave**

  
  


**I**

"Uh… Daniel…" Jack wriggled, trying to loosen the tight grip of two skinny arms around his neck. He needed to get up for urgent business and couldn't because his sleeping mini archaeologist was drooling on his chest.

"Da…" he groaned, freeing himself from the boy's arms. 

Daniel slid off him and curled up into a ball, mumbling something incoherent in his sleep. He wrinkled his eyebrows and nose. And there was this pout on his face, his lower lip jutting out just a little, as if he was complaining because the warmth was gone all of a sudden. Jack caught himself smiling at the sleeping form. He reached out and pulled the sleeping bag over the boy. Daniel sighed and snuggled in without waking up. 

Thinking back to the events of last night, a shadow fell over Jack's face. He wondered if Daniel might have second thoughts about the way he had dealt with him. He wasn't entirely sure he'd done the right thing even though he'd told him he'd do it again, if necessary. No way was the little Wretch getting away with lying. Jack wouldn't put up with that. If Daniel wanted to behave like an annoying little brat he'd be treated like one. 

End of story. 

Now, why did he still feel like the bad guy here? Because he'd spanked Daniel out of anger and hurt feelings? Maybe. Yet, he had to punish him, there was no doubt about that. He hoped he got his point across for the time being.

For crying out loud… shouldn't Daniel's genius thirty something year old brain understand he wasn't going to get his way like that? He'd always been difficult when it came to following orders. But most of the time – as much as Jack hated to admit it – he had some poignant reasons for questioning the chain of command. Running off and telling lies just because he wanted to explore something was so not a good reason. Or maybe in Daniel's current frame of mind it was. 

O'Neill rubbed at the dry spots on his green BDU jacket, where Daniel had left traces of tears and snot last night. Well, he'd better get some coffee for his little angel and see what kind of mood he was in when he woke up. 

After taking care of his bladder, Jack walked over to the fireplace, where Carter already had the coffee brewing. She turned to look at him and went back to work without a word. When he reached her and mumbled a, “Good morning,” he expected her to give him two cups. It was an unwritten law. Whoever was up first washed the cups and brewed fresh coffee for the others.

However, this morning was different.

She handed him a cup. "It's for Daniel."

He raised an eyebrow. "Nice."

He waited for his own cup, but Carter decided to ignore him and have breakfast instead. Jack took his own cup, peered inside and emptied the leftovers from yesterday into the flames before he took the pot and helped himself to fresh coffee. 

"Slept well?" 

"No."

"O-kay. What's up?"

When she didn't answer, he shrugged, took the two cups and went back to the tent. Whatever had triggered Carter’s crankiness, it would pass. She was too much of a professional to let her mood get the upper hand over her job. 

Once he'd waved the steaming coffee under Daniel's nose, the long lashes ca me up and two sleepy blue eyes gazed at him. Daniel sniffed and reached out for his cup almost blindly. “G'way, J'ck,"

"And a good morning to you, too, Daniel."

"Stop. 's gross. 's night still," Daniel mumbled. As he took his first sip of coffee his eyes closed again. 

Jack noticed how long Daniel's hair had grown over the last weeks. It was time for a hair cut. However, when he thought of it, he had to admit he'd had always liked Daniel with longer hair when he'd been big. And it looked cute on the kid, too. Carefully he brushed away the blonde bangs from Daniel's forehead. "I thought we’d go and check out your cool cave. But if you’d rather sleep all day…?" 

Daniel took another gulp of coffee and opened his eyes again, looking more awake now. He knitted his brows in concentration as if he tried to remember something. Then he ducked his head, a pink blush covering his young face.

"Do… do you think they heard me bawling la st night?" th e kid finally murmured into his cup.

Jack scratched his head. This hadn't occurred to him until now. "I don't think so. Teal'c wasn't even there, Baxter was in his tent and Carter was on watch, walking perimeters or something," he finally said.

"It was really bad, wasn't it?" 

"Yeah, well… you know… It wasn't really a secret that you were in some kind of trouble."

"I'm such a baby," Daniel hissed, self disgust in his voice. 

He placed his cup on the ground next to his sleeping bag. When he sat up, his arms came around his body to hug himself as he gazed at Jack, a deep frown on his face. "I mean, what did you do? Slap me a few times. Wasn't that bad, really. And I howled like you were torturing me. One could think Apophis was ripping my balls off or something."

Jack felt the odd urge to scold Daniel for bad language. Hearing things like this, coming out in that young voice made him cringe. And should being a linguist not count for something? 

Of course, Daniel could swear in so many languages, Jack didn't understand half the things he was muttering sometimes. Oh, Daniel rarely cursed or used bad words in public. But he was capable of a very impressive vocabulary if he put his mind to it. And Jack wasn't exactly a role model in this area either. Daniel had been hanging around Jack for too long way before this incident made him a seven year old again. He was rubbing off on the brat and the damage was already done. 

So he just sighed. "It happened. Get over it."

Picking up his glasses, Daniel scrambled out from under his own sleeping bag and rubbed his hands over his face. “Can I skip breakfast and talk to Baxter about the videos instead? I'm sure he already watched them," he asked hopefully.

"No."

"I'm not hungry."

"You didn't have dinner," Jack argued while he folded the sleeping bags.

"Ja-ack…"

"Why don't you go, get a sandwich and take it with you while you talk to Baxter about your videos," O'Neill suggested, not wanting another argument before breakfast.

"I can have another cup of coffee," Daniel demanded, frowning at him.

"Only if you eat a whole sandwich."

"Without cream," came the next condition.

Daniel was standing now, staring down at Jack, frown firmly in place. Jack was about to snap at the brat, when he realized that maybe Daniel needed to win this argument just to make clear things hadn't really changed between them since last night. 

So he swallowed the sharp answer and nodded. "Deal."

The boy's face brightened immediately and a moment later they left their tent.

They washed their faces and hands in a small lake nearby and brushed their teeth. Jack ran a hand across his jaw, deciding he could shave tomorrow. Then they returned to camp and put away their toiletries. They found all other members of SG-1 sitting around the fire, enjoying their breakfast. Jack opened the MRE container and took out two sandwiches. 

When they sa t down between Carter and Baxter, Daniel started talking to Gared about the footage he'd taken in his cave. Gared's green eyes lit up and the two of them were off in their own world of mythology and rocks… 

Daniel only stopped talking when Carter handed him a fresh cup of coffee

"Did you sleep well, DanielJackson?" Teal'c asked when Daniel was quiet for a minute, to enjoy his drink.

"Yes, thank you, Teal'c."

"Are you feeling better, now that your conscience is clear?" the Jaffa wanted to know, just the hint of a smile on his face.

Daniel blushed and stared into his coffee. Jack could feel him edge a little closer, until their knees touched. Unseen by his teammates he put his hand on the kid's back for support. 

Apparently Daniel was working on an apology here. And Jack knew how difficult it was to ask for some sort of forgiveness loudly. No matter if you were an adult or a kid. But he could remember it was far more embarrassing when he'd been little. When Jack had been a boy, most of the apologies he had to make were forced out of him by his parents. The ones he'd made because he really felt sorry were the real hard ones. 

Jack hadn't told the kid to apologize to the others. He figured Daniel would come up with it on his own. And he'd been right.

"Yes. I do. Um… and I know I caused trouble last night. The search parties and all. I didn't mean to…uh…"

"Did O'Neill make it clear to you that your actions were irresponsible and your behavior was not that of a man but of a child?"

Daniel gulped and after a moment of silence, nodded very seriously. He was drawing himself up straight and faced the Jaffa’s dark eyes. "Yes. I made a lot of mistakes and I'm not very proud of it. I'm really sorry about all this."

"Children do make mistakes. So do men, DanielJackson. Being both at the same time must be a very disturbing experience. But you are strong and you will learn. Now we will speak of this no further."

"Thank you, Teal'c."

Teal'c bowed his head.

Carter snorted and muttered, "Is this some kind of male bonding ritual?"

Jack and Teal'c looked at her, simultaneously raising an eyebrow.

"Are you not in a good mood, MajorCarter?" the Jaffa finally asked.

"No. I'm good," she shot back, stuff ing her half-eaten san dwich into its plastic bag.

Daniel said, "I can understand if you're mad at me, Sam. I can only say again… I'm sorry."

Her expression changed in a heartbeat. Giving him one of her biggest smiles, she shook her head and assured him. "Oh no, Daniel. I'm not mad at you. I mean, what you did wasn't right and we were all very worried. But it's okay now, really," 

"Oh, okay. I'm glad… um… but - not that I'm complaining. I'm happy you're not mad at me. But who are you mad at?"

"Me? I'm not mad," Carter replied, her smile fading.

"Sure ya are," Jack objected. 

"Are you suffering premenstrual syndrome symptoms? I can be on assistance with a meditation technique." Teal'c offered.

Daniel stopped chewing his sandwich. "Oh. Sha’uri had that, too. I know a massage that could help."

Jack snorted into his coffee, when Carter exploded. "Once and for all -- I don’t have PMS! What is it with you guys?"

Jack decided it was better to change subject. “Okay, kids. I want you to gear up and be ready in twenty. Daniel discovered this cave and wants us to take a look at it. We need lamps. And I want to be back and at the gate at nineteen hundred. If we need more time to explore this, I have to talk to Hammond."

Daniel looked up at him, a shocked expression on his young face. "You are going to ask Hammond for more time? Really? Wow. That's… I haven't even started to explain why exactly this is so important. And you just… Cool."

"Well, I have to take a look at it first. But since Baxter is already drooling over it I don't see why Hammond shouldn't grant this. If there's no emergency for saving the world right now…" Jack shrugged, grinning down at Daniel. 

He couldn't help it. He was proud of the kid for having the courage to apologize to his teammates the way he did. And besides, now he lured the first huge smile out of Daniel since they got up today. That was worth a little cave exploring.

Doctor Baxter held up the video camera. "This is very fascinating, Daniel. I am looking forward to seeing more of it. I better get ready to leave.“

After he had left, Daniel turned to Jack. "Can I talk to the general and ask him to get a few things? We need a better video camera and stronger lamps and a few tools for some stone samples and maybe I could have…"

"Yeahsureyabetcha," Jack quipped, feeling more and more at ease. 

"Great!"

Carter muttered under her breath, "Oh look. Someone's feeling guilty here."

Daniel's smile faded and Jack spun around to glare at her. "What the hell is the matter with you, Carter?"

"Nothing, sir," she answered stiffly.

"You are a little tense, Major..." 

"Really? What gave it away? As you pointed out before, I've been a little tense since the day we met.” she snapped in totally Carter-unlike sarcasm.

Jack was taken aback at the anger in her voice. "Woah… Carter! What did I do?"

"Permission to get my gear together – sir," she said coldly and marched off.

"Carter!" Jack was about to follow her when a tug at his arm made him stop.

"Jack.” Daniel shook his head. He chewed his bottom lip, a sure sign he was tensed, too. "I knew it. She heard me last night and now she's mad at you. She must think you tried to kill me, the way I was wailing."

"Oh, for crying out. I’ll go and talk to her," Jack muttered. 

"No! Please don't… don't talk to her. She'll calm down. She's just mad because she doesn't want anyone to hurt me. I don't … I don't want you to discuss… you know… it's between you and me. It's private," Daniel murmured in a hushed voice, blushing. 

Jack sucked in a deep breath. What was Carter thinking he'd done to Daniel? "I need to clear this with her.“

When he felt a small hand creeping into his own, he stared down at their entwined fingers, then into those huge blue eyes gazing up at him . He couldn't see hurt or anger in them. Only trust and warmth and the hint of sadness that seemed to be part of Daniel now that he was a kid again.

"She'll get over it. I'm okay. We are okay."

Jack put his other hand on the back of Daniel's neck and squeezed tenderly. He hadn't been aware how much he needed Daniel to be at peace with what had happened last night, until now. And as silly as it was, he had to tell Daniel. He knew he would sound like a sap and maybe Daniel would just roll his eyes at him, but it was important. "Danny, I…"

"We're ready to leave, sir." Carter seemed to materialize next to them, geared up and being her professional self again. 

He liked Carter. He really did. But today she was acting real strange and happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. He was starting to get a little annoyed with her.

When she returned his glare, he remembered she was mad at him as well and so they just glowered at one another for a moment. Finally it was Carter who broke the eye contact which gave Jack an odd feeling of satisfaction.

"I’ll go get our packs," he muttered to Daniel. When he returned, Teal'c and Baxter had joined the group. 

Jack clapped Daniel on the shoulder. "Okay, buddy – lead the way."

*******

Daniel led SG-1 over the plateau and down the path towards the village. He heard Jack's boots thump on the ground next to him and when he looked just a little to his left, he could see him. He felt strangely good and needed a moment to think about the reason. It wasn't just the fact he wasn't carrying all those lies with him anymore. Or that Jack had promised to convince Hammond to let them stay longer. Today was the first time he wasn't in the middle of the group, totally shielded by his teammates. 

He was taking point next to Jack. Teal'c was somewhere on his right, but not too close. And Sam was behind him with Baxter.

They reached the lake and Sam found a route around it since the boat was too small to carry them all over. Hiking would take longer than crossing it. So Jack and Daniel took the boat, while the rest of the group walked.

Jack shoved their backpacks and his gun under Daniel's seat to prevent them from getting wet. Then he grabbed the paddles and started to row with fast strong strokes. Daniel could see the muscles in Jack's arms flex once he had taken off his jacket. 

"I'm glad I don't have to walk. My legs are already tired. Being so weak is really annoying," he said with a grimace.

"Well, I guess you're still a little worn out from your little adventure last night.“

"My arms hurt from rowing. And I was running a lot," Daniel admitted.

"Serves you right if you ask me."

"I didn't ask."

"I'm just saying."

"Don't be so smug about it. It's embarrassing enough as it is." Daniel cringed.

Jack put down the paddles for a moment. "Hey, I liked the way you handled things with Teal'c and Carter."

Daniel blinked. What was Jack talking about? He had apologized. It was the least he could do. "It wasn't a big deal." 

"Must've felt like one when you did it." Jack started rowing again. 

Daniel bent over the rim of the boat and let his hand slide through the water. It was cool and refreshing. He saw little fish deep down in the lake.

"If you fall in there, we have to go back to camp," Jack warned.

Daniel rolled his eyes. How old was he? Three? He couldn't resist answering in a squeaky voice, "Can we change my diaper, too, then?"

"You want your binky and a rattle, munchkin?" 

Daniel flipped up his hand and splashed water at Jack, who ducked, laughing. Then he raised one of the paddles and let cold droplets rain on Daniel's head. Squeaking, Daniel tried to steer away from it and almost lost his balance.

"Stooop it, Jack! If I fall in, we have to go back to camp!"

"That’s what I said," Jack chuckled and continued to row.

"You're such an idiot." 

"Yep. And you're a geek."

"Flyboy."

"Book boy"

"Prick!"

“Hey!” Jack splashed the paddle into the water and Daniel got wet all over his jacket. "JACK! Stop it!"

"You started it."

Daniel took off his glasses and wiped them on his pants. Then he bent over the boat rim again and started to shovel up a handful of water and splattered it over Jack's knees and groin.

"DANIEL!" Jack yelled, losing one of the paddles when he jumped up. "Damn! Look what you did!" 

"You look like you've wet your pants," Daniel giggled once the boat stopped swaying.

Jack was looking for the missing paddle and for a second an evil thought crossed Daniel's mind as he watched his friend kneeling in the boat, bent over the rim, presenting his backside. It would only take a little push to send Jack into the water...

However, Daniel wanted to live a while longer and he didn't want to return to camp because Jack had to change his clothes, so he just laughed some more about his vivid imagination.

"Can you stop laughing for a minute and hold my legs?"

Daniel really tried to sober. but couldn't help the fits of giggles as he grabbed Jack's calves. "I don't know if I can hold you. You're heavy, you know…" he managed, before the urge to laugh overwhelmed him again.

"Just balance me out while I grab this," Jack muttered, his head and shoulders somewhere outside the boat, hovering over the water.

"Stop wriggling so much, Ja…"

Suddenly the boat almost turned over. There was a splashing sound and the upper half of Jack's body was nowhere to be seen. Daniel almost lost his grip around Jack's calves. But he reacted fast enough and threw himself over Jack's legs with all his weight and grabbed the waistband of Jack's pants with both hands, pulling with all his strength. 

Jack came up, spluttering and cursing, while Daniel was still pulling to get the colonel back into the boat. Jack held the paddle in one hand and clamped his other hand around the boat's rim, while he was pushing himself backwards. In a tangle of arms and legs they finally managed to get him back into the boat without losing the paddle again.

Once they had settled down again, Daniel started laughing. He couldn't help it.

His own jacket was wet and so was his hair. But Jack looked like he'd taken a bath. Only small parts of his pants were dry. O'Neill grimly grabbed the paddles and started rowing again. 

Uh-oh.

“Are we going back now? Hey, Jack? It wasn't my fault... I did try to hold your legs...“

Jack grimaced but, much to Daniel's relief, didn't turn the boat around. 

They made it to the shore without further incidents. Jack pulled the boat up on the beach and ordered Daniel to take off his jacket and shirt. They both hung their wet clothes over a nearby tree and sat on the grass to wait for their teammates. Daniel wondered if Jack was seriously mad, but his worries came to rest when Jack poked his ribs and announced he'd throw him into the water on their way back. 

“You won't,” Daniel snorted.

“Oh, but I will.“

“Won't.“

“Just wait for it.” Jack grinned. 

Daniel stretched out on the grass, gazing at the cloudless sky. The grass blades tickled his bare back and neck, but it wasn't uncomfortable. He dozed off and had some weird dream about going down a waterfall in a rowboat...

Later Jack woke him gently, telling him their clothes were almost dry. He was already wearing his pants again, which were only a little damp now. 

The rest of SG-1 appeared a bit later, all looking dusty and sweaty from their hike, except Teal'c. They stared at their CO and archeologist, who plucked their shirts and jackets from the tree. Jack looked down at his naked upper body and shrugged. Daniel had to laugh again.

"Daniel started a water fight and I lost the paddle," Jack explained.

"Jack was calling me names," Daniel complained, still grinning.

"You little Wretch, you started it," Jack snapped.

"See? He's doing it again," Daniel mock-whined.

"Brat!"

"Não seja um burro, Jack."

"What?"

Daniel blinked back at him all innocent. "What?"

Sam and Teal'c exchanged a look, while Baxter just gaped.

Pointing a finger at the newest member of his team, Jack snarled, "Translate that, Baxter!"

"I… I… It's Portugese."

“And what did he say?" Jack demanded to know, giving Daniel the evil eye.

Daniel shrugged. "Não seja um…"

"Um… maybe Daniel should tell you himself," Baxter suggested. 

"Yeah, but he's smart enough not to." Jack snorted.

"I really don't think I can translate it," Baxter apologized, giving Daniel an awkward glance.

"It seems DoctorBaxter is a smart man as well," Teal'c said, raising his eyebrow.

Jack balled up his T-shirt and threw it after Daniel, who ducked behind Sam with a shriek. She shook her head and picked up the shirt. Handing it back to Jack, she said, "We found the cave already. But we decided to come here first, _Colonel_ – and  _Doctor Jackson_ ." 

Daniel peeked around her at Jack, who growled. "You are so going to pay for this, grasshopper." 

"We should go now. Jack." .

"We should throw you in the lake first," Jack muttered, but went to get their packs.

When Jack handed Daniel his gear, he bent down to him and whispered, "I'll get you… Just wait for it." Daniel just snickered and took off in the direction of his cave. 

**II**

As soon as Daniel entered the cave, everything else was forgotten over the excitement. The powerful flashlights made it much easier to find their way around fallen rocks and through the narrow path. When they reached the huge cavern, Baxter wandered around in the same amazement Daniel had on his first visit here.

 

 

Jack and Teal'c crossed the cavern, making sure there was nothing dangerous. Sam collected samples of the rocks and then joined the two anthropologists in their journey through time.

They discussed the writings and pictures. Baxter shook his head about the alien language. He was as clueless as Daniel.

"I want to go into the temple," Daniel said with a sigh. 

He pointed out to Baxter the drawings showing the 'little people' and how they used the tiny holes as an entrance. They had climbed up with ropes and disappeared into the building. There was, however, no plan or map showing the inside of the building. Daniel suspected those parts of the pictures had been destroyed by weather and time.

"Maybe we can convince Colonel O'Neill to let you take a glimpse inside. You're the only one who is small enough to get into those holes. If somebody puts you on his shoulders it might be possible to take a glimpse. I don't think he’ll allow you to go in there, though," Sam said, thoughtful.

"No. He won't allow me to go in there. I'm not sure he’ll let me take a look. But it can't hurt to ask."

He glanced at Jack and Teal'c standing at the far end of this chamber in front of a wall of rocks. Jack was poking between the loose stones with his P90. The echo carried Jack's voice over to him. "Looks like this wall came down."

Teal'c agreed. "There is another cavern behind it. I can feel the draft of air."

"Yeah. I hope that doesn't mean this place is unstable." Jack was worried.

Daniel left Baxter and Sam and walked over to them. Looking at the wall, he saw a hole just big enough to let a small body through. "There might be more writings over there," he murmured to himself.

Without thinking he started climbing up rubble and stones, when Jack’s voice called after him. "Daniel, no!"

"I can get through." Then there were stones rumbling down under his feet as the whole wall seemed to move and slide away from under him. He froze, suddenly realizing what he attempted to do was a bad idea. “Uhhh,” he started, and then he found himself hovering in the air. He spun around to see who was holding him. “You can let me down, Teal'c.”

"Do not attempt to climb that wall again, DanielJackson."

“No, not gonna climb it again. Promise.“

Teal'c's strong hands put him gently on his feet. Daniel felt the blush creeping into his face, when he straightened his clothes and saw Jack glowering.

“Sorry,” he muttered. 

“One more stunt like that and we're outta here,” Jack warned.

“Okay.” 

At least the wall didn't come down for real. Climbing up there hadn't been smart. But he was so much lighter than before, he'd thought it would hold him. And if the other part of this cave had been buried for a long time, what possible danger would there be in it? 

On the other hand, one never knew. They had found living creatures in long deserted places. And the wall could have come down. Daniel groaned. When would he learn again to think before he acted? Sometimes he thought Jack had been right when he stated that Daniel wasn't ready for gate travel. Or wasn't fit for it anymore.

And yet, all the complaining and scolding aside, Jack was supporting him, encouraging him and taking him through the gate with SG-1 still. So Daniel had to try harder to do it right. He had to get a grip on his urge to do everything right now and without further thinking. 

He could do it. Had been able to all his life. He'd been used to taking care of himself when he was little the first time. He never had a Jack around to protect him when he had been a child, after his parents had died. Why was acting rational so much harder, now that he should know better? He had no idea. He had just seen the hole and wanted to go to the other side. Now.

Daniel let out a sigh. 

Two hours later, they took a break. Daniel felt chilly due to the much cooler air inside the mountain. So when Jack called them via radio to come out, he followed Baxter and Sam without any arguments.

There was a little fire burning near the entrance. Jack was holding a stick in his hands. Attached to it was a thin string and Jack was preparing the string with something silver. When Daniel looked more closely he realized it was the wrapper of a chewing gum. Jack stuck the chewing gum to the string and put the wrapper around it, then looked at his work, apparently satisfied. Sam, who had sat down on the other side of the fire, watched him. Daniel was glad to see the deep frown gone from her face. She seemed to be interested in what Jack was doing. 

"Now, that will work."

"I don't think so, sir." Sam shook her head.

"Sure it will. I saw it on that TV show…"

"MacGyver," Teal'c helped.

"Right, T! He made a fishing rod out of a chewing gum wrapper and it worked."

"It's a TV show, sir," Sam said.

"So is The Simpsons. And there is lots of wisdom in it," Jack insisted, rising to his feet and waving at Daniel. "Come  on. Let's get some fish for lunch."

"But I want to go back in a minute…"

"Nope. You're taking a break to warm up. I always wanted to show you how to fish properly. And there are fish in this pond."

"Ja-ack, I never wanted to know how to fish when I was b…" He stopped when he remembered that Baxter was with them.

Jack put his arm around Daniel's shoulders and steered him towards the lake. "It's never too late to learn a few new things, Danny-boy."

"I'm not going to fish," Daniel groused. 

“Charlie and I used to go fishing together," Jack suddenly said. His voice was still light, but he wasn't looking at Daniel and his cap was shielding his eyes.

"I am not Charlie," Daniel blurted out.

"I know that, Daniel."

"So what…"

“Just... humor me, okay?”

Daniel sighed. “Fine.”

Apparently Jack found the right spot, a few minutes away from the sandy beach. The water was deeper here. Flat stones at the shore provided a place to s it. Daniel watched Jack pull off his boots and socks, then sit down and throw out his fishing line. Seeing that Jack wasn't about to leave that stone for some time, Daniel sat down next to him after he got rid of his boots and socks, too. They put their feet into the cold water and Daniel absently wriggled his toes. 

They sat there for what seemed a long time. The stones were warm from the sun and the water was splashing against the shore in drowsy little waves. Daniel could hear the birds screech in the sky. And he felt a little like in Minnesota when he had been at the cabin with Jack.

They never went to Minnesota anymore.

He didn't want to go back there. Too many memories. Minnesota had been their little paradise. No don't ask don't tell… no strings, no hiding. The cabin had been their own little world to cherish each other and let down everything. If he closed his eyes he could hear whispering voices from the past. Laughing… moaning… giggling… he could smell the pond water on their skins after a swim… he could remember happiness… 

But it was all so far away now. Only memories. Memories he so often wished he hadn't. 

Wouldn't it be great to be a real kid? To have the opportunity to enjoy this second childhood with all  its  wonders and adventures? Without carrying the burden of his former life, to be aware of what he had been and what he knew? Jack would give him everything he never had the first time around. He was doing it even now if Daniel allowed it. But he couldn't bring himself to let go and be Jack's kid all the time. 

He enjoyed some of it though. They had been to Denver once, visiting a museum and suddenly Jack had suggested going to the zoo. When Daniel had stopped complaining, he’d actually loved the zoo and had had the time of his life. 

Another time Jack had lured him to a fair near Colorado Springs and Daniel found himself wanting to go on the carousel and on the roller coaster. They did it together and afterward Daniel had thrown up his French fries. But it had been well worth it.

He wished he'd had a father like Jack when he had been a real kid. After the loss of his parents there had been nobody like that for him. He’d always been the odd kid, the geeky boy with allergies and glasses. Not all his foster homes had been bad. But he never really felt at home anywhere. 

Daniel looked over at Jack, with his do-it-yourself rod. 

Charlie must've been a lucky boy, Daniel thought. Even though Jack always said he'd been a failure as a father and hadn't been home most of the time. Daniel was sure Charlie had loved his daddy and that Jack had been his hero. Daniel's own dad never came home again…. Shortly before Daniel's eighth birthday his parents had left him for good. Now he was seven again. 

Was he going to be Daniel Jackson O'Neill?

It was still an open issue.

They were still dancing around it somehow. Hammond was still pressing them for an answer. 

"Daniel, how are we doing? What do you think?" Jack's voice pulled him out of his musings.

"What do you mean?"

"You, me… the whole… kid thing. You think we handle it okay?"

"I think we're doing the best we can," Daniel answered. Then he added quietly, "At least you do. I don't know about me. I don't think I’m coping very… well."

"I'm not sure I'm handling it any better than you do," Jack sighed. "Sometimes I'm still so freaked out over all this."

Daniel hung his head and splashed his feet through the water. He could see fishes. None of them was interested in the chewing gum rubber. "I'm sorry," he said

"It isn't your fault, Daniel."

"I touched the knob." There it was. He had touched the knob. Jack had told him not to and he'd done it anyway.

"Yeah… well… I put my head into an Ancient something and got a whole bunch of crap downloaded into my poor brain."

"Wasn't crap. It was meaning of life stuff," Daniel said with a sad smile.

"Remember what I told you yesterday? How we all make bad choices sometimes? Bottom line is, we all touch things we shouldn't. You might do it a little more often than others… but it has happened and there's no one to blame."

Daniel shoved up his glasses and wiped frantically at his eyes. He had to get a grip. He had never cried so much in his whole life. It was disgusting. "It's still my fault. All of this."

"Daniel." Jack reached for him, but he pulled away. He didn't want to be hugged. Not now. Because he'd lose it if Jack hugged him. And Daniel didn't want to end up bawling and clinging onto him again. 

"I can only blame myself for it. And now you have to put up with me like this. Sometimes I really wonder why you do it."

"Danny…."

"I touched…"

"…doesn't matter."

"…the wall and you told me…"

"Daniel, stop it!"

"…to leave it alone. And you said," he tried to keep a steady voice, "I ruined both our lives with what I did. And I don't want to admit it, because you… you're going to be very smug about it, but you're right and…"

Jack stared at him for a moment, then threw his stick aside and grabbed Daniel's upper arms with both hands. "Look at me!"

When he raised his eyes to meet Jack's, he was taken aback by the anguish he saw in them. "I say a lot of things. And you know, some of them are nonsense. I was mad. I was angry. I still am sometimes. It's not fair to either of us. But – it - is - not – your- fault!"

"Who's fault is it then, Jack? Because you didn't touch the wall. You didn't encourage me to touch. It was me. And maybe I deserve this. But I don't want this. Sometimes I'd rather be d…." 

"All right, hold it. Right there! Don't you ever die on me again or even say something like that, Doctor Jackson! Blaming yourself or anyone else won't make it go away," Jack yelled back, still holding him in a tight grip. Daniel's arms hurt, but somehow it was good to feel the pain. 

The tears were gone now. Daniel's hands grabbed Jack's jacket and held onto it for dear live . “Wh at's your point?!" 

"I don't want you to blame yourself and I don't want you to think I'm blaming you! Snap out of it, Daniel. Because what you're doing right now sounds like self-pity. And you're not a self pity kind of guy!"

"It’s not self-pity. I just don't want this."

"It's what you are now. Get that in your stubborn head."

"I don't want to be THIS. I had a LIFE! I know it must be boring for you to hear this all over again. I am sorry. I just can't adapt so easily. You might be able to move on and give up on us. You are… you are… becoming my god damn father!"

And it didn't matter right now that Daniel had liked the idea five minutes ago. 

"I'm not giving up on us! I’m trying to change US! Because I want there to be an US. And I want you to face this, Daniel! I want you to move on with me. You need to get  over it. It's destroying you. Cope with it. Try to… accept it."

"I can't," Daniel whispered. There was no strength in him for more yelling. "I can't. I just… can't."

"You're damn strong, Danny. But fighting this is going nowhere. Use that power to cope with it. I need you to help me. Work with me," Jack whispered back.

Basically it was just a re-run of the talk they had after Daniel's housewarming party. But the issue hadn't gone away and it wouldn't go away, no matter how often they talked it through. 

Their eyes were still locked and they were still holding onto each other. Daniel's mouth went dry. "Sorry…."

"I'm trying, Daniel. I'm trying real hard. And I can't … not all the time. But we have to. And if we can't do it on our own we need… to talk to somebody."

Talk to somebody? An icy shiver ran down his spine. "No."

"Daniel."

"I'm not talking to MacKenzie."

"There are others… ."

"No! Let me go!"

But Jack was gripping him only tighter, locking onto his eyes a lmost pleadingly. "We can do this together. I was thinking about it last night. And believe me, this isn't a piece of cake for me. I've been there, done that and it was never of my own free will. But this time, Daniel, I don't think we can make it alone."

Daniel was shaking his head, trying not to listen to what Jack wa s saying. He didn't want to see a shrink. How could Jack expect him to? A shrink would want to talk about Daniel's first childhood, about his parents, his foster care, his… "We can't. They'll find out somehow. About us," he hissed.

"We'll find someone discreet. I'm gonna talk to Janet."

"No! They might think you… They might take me away from you. Jack. I don't want to end up in foster care again. Or anywhere else the Air Force might put me. I don't want to see you in jail or something just because people have sick fantasies and don't know us."

"God…" Letting him go, Jack sank down on the warm flat stone, shielding his eyes with one arm from the sun. 

"I wish I could do something. Anything. I know how hard this must be for you. I want to be here for you, Jack. But I don't know how. I'm the one who is only taking from you… and I hate it," Daniel said brokenly.

Jack took his arm away and looked at him. Daniel saw the moisture in the older man's eyes. After a moment of stunned silence, Jack sat up and took Daniel's hands in his. "Give it a try. Let's talk to Janet."

"I can't. Please, Jack. Don't make me talk to a shrink. Don't …"

"Danny… "

"No. It's the only thing I can't do, Jack. I promise, I will try. I'll try to… get used to it. I really do. I'm getting better. But please… ."

"I don't want you to just get better. I want you to feel comfortable in your skin again.“

"I can't. " 

A few more minutes passed in silence. Then Jack sighed. "We better get back. You can explore a little more before we have to go and report to Hammond." He broke his fishing rod in two pieces and threw it into the lake after he'd ripped off the chewing gum. "Damn TV shows," he muttered

When they were on their way back, Daniel hesitated. "Jack?"

"Yeah?"

"Are we okay?"

Jack held out his hand for him and Daniel grabbed it, holding onto it the whole way until they reached the cave. 

It was good to feel Jack's hand around his. Jack's hands were big and secure. Daniel didn't want to lose Jack, ever. And that was the reason why he could never talk to a psychologist. He only hoped Jack would let it go.

**III**

Another hour later they were on their way back to camp. Jack had taken a closer look at the paint-covered walls in Daniel's cave. He had to admit there was a lot to look at. While the writings meant nothing to him, some of the pictures were really good. Daniel explained what he found out and told Jack he wanted to make a power point presentation to the archeological department of the SGC  about the 'little people'. 

Around five they started to get their gear together. 

Gared and Daniel were already discussing the possibility to explore the area around the cave and maybe get a dig site at the beach nearby. They also wanted to break through to the hidden chamber.

Apparently the kid had overcome his grudge towards Baxter for now.

Other than that Daniel had been subdued. 

Jack had been thinking about the possibility of talking to a shrink over the past months and always shrugged it off as something they just wouldn't do. They'd been through so much crap together, he just assumed they'd deal with this, too. But he started to think he might be wrong. Daniel was like a ticking bomb. He was acting too much like the seven year old from time to time. Like a seven year old with major emotional disorders. Not like the normal happy kid, mind you. 

He had managed to stay out of serious trouble until now. But Jack knew he was focusing too much on Daniel's needs and safety. He needed to think straight out here. He had responsibilities towards his whole team and was supposed to h ave things under control. The universe wasn't Daniel's exclusive big sandbox and Jack wasn't his lifeguard. He was the leader of the SGC flagship team. And if he was losing his abilities to lead SG-1, to focus on his job, it might cost someone's life sooner or later.

He had to do something. 

Jack knew he was already giving Daniel favorable treatment. Well, they all did. It came with being little and having those charming blue eyes. 

Maybe seeing a shrink was a bad idea. And Daniel had that point about what a shrink might think about their former relationship if it came out accidentally. But Jack had to get himself under control if he wanted to be able to do his job and keep his people safe – and stay sane himself. He couldn't afford to be distracted out in the field. If he couldn't feel relaxed about having Daniel around, because the boy couldn't keep himself under control… maybe Hammond  _should_ ground him. 

Even if it would break Daniel's heart. 

It just felt wrong on so many levels. Daniel needed to be out here. 

Then there were Jack's own issues with  the whole situation and he still had trouble having fun with his right hand, never mind getting any pleasure at all from anybody else. 

Which was a whole different story. 

Sometimes Jack just wanted to be able to jerk off SOMEHOW. Doing it for himself had been good enough before Daniel moved from being his friend to being his lover. 

One should think it would be good enough again, now that he'd lost Daniel. 

But apparently it wasn't. Or it was if he could do it with nice thoughts about big Daniel. But those nice stimulating thoughts always turned out to be disturbed by odd feelings about his loss or the realization that Daniel was still there. 

Seven. 

And Daniel being seven was nice, but an absolute turn off in any possible way. 

But somehow Jack couldn't do it without thinking about Daniel. It w as gross. It was as if his brain wanted to torture him. Jack had so many memories about making love to big Daniel he just couldn't stop to fantasize about it, no matter how hard he tried.

Great.

Was he going to tell that to a psychologist?

He didn't think so.

He looked over at his troubled kid sitting on the other side of the boat, dog tired, eyes half closed. It had been a long day. Every thought of throwing him in the lake as payback for his own little bath in the morning had left Jack's mind.

They reached the shore and Jack pulled the little ship out of the water while Daniel stood nearby, yawning widely.

"You're tired," Jack said gently.

"I'm not tired, " Daniel mumbled, being defensive on auto pilot.

Jack looked up at the cloudy sky and checked his watch. It was late and he wanted to talk to Hammond. The others would go straight to camp. Jack wanted to take Daniel to the gate where the MALP was. But they had to walk a few miles to get there and he wasn't sure if Danny would make it. 

"Daniel, come over here for a minute?"

Daniel obliged and let Jack cuddle him for a moment. "Let me take you on my shoulders."

"I can walk."

"It's a long way and you're exhausted. Nobody will know."

"No."

"It's just you and me, buddy. And we are late already. Hammond is waiting for his report."

"I'm fine, Jack. I can walk," Daniel insisted through gritted teeth.

Jack sighed. Had he really thought the adult Daniel Jackson had been stubborn? This kid-version was topping everything. He picked up Daniel's backpack. "Okay. Let me carry your pack then."

"Sure. I'm the only archaeologist who has a colonel as his luggage carrier." Daniel grinned, hiding a yawn behind his hands. 

Jack pulled a face and started walking. He just hoped Carter wouldn't find out it was him now who carried Daniel's pack, after he had told her she'd end up doing it if she didn't stop spoiling him. Well, d'oh. 

They needed longer than he had planned because Daniel really was tired and fell behind. But he walked the whole way with a stubborn frown on his face and a tightly set chin. He was a real fighter, the little bug. Jack caught himself once more at the thought how proud he was of Daniel, despite everything. Could he really blame him for losing it from time to time? 

When they reached the gate it was almost eighteen thirty. The general was a little concerned about the delay. Before Jack was able to explain, Daniel stepped up next to him.

"It's my fault, sir. I wanted to talk to you and come with Jack. But we needed more time than we thought. We found an interesting cave. And I was filming the walls, so Jack had to wait for me."

Jack raised his eyebrows at the munchkin, but made no comment. He knew how important it was for Daniel not to show his little weaknesses to anybody at the SGC. His work was the most important thing in his life – always had been – and the fight against his kid-side meant he was stretching the truth just a little bit so no one would think he was too little to do his job. And Jack was covering for him, too, on occasions.

He was compromised by a seven year old. And here he had smacked the brat for lying.

This was another reason adding up why he had to change course and find a better way for both of them.

The general was satisfied with this explanation and they went right to business. Jack let Daniel rattle on about the list he and Baxter had made, to request more equipment. Jack seconded everything the boy said and then Daniel went over to the gate steps and sat down there while Jack discussed other things with Hammond. "Sir, we maybe need another few days. Daniel and Doctor Baxter think they might find more around here. Our scientists will flip over all the writings and pictures anyway."

"I grant you two days. I wish I could give you more, but… you are scheduled to go to Washington in three days for a meeting."

Jack rolled his eyes. Just what he needed. A dress blues event. He looked over to the gate where Daniel was still sitting on the steps. He was drawing something in the sand with the tip of his boot.

When Jack was sure his little friend wasn't listening, he said, "Daniel found it, General. It's… his thing. And he is really excited. So is Baxter, by the way."

"I'm sorry. If this is worth it I will send another team in to finish what you started there," Hammond answered.

"I think Daniel would like to do this himself."

"Do you think he's ready to go out with another team? I could assign him to the team that will explore this cave further. But you have to make the decision, Jack. I need to be sure he won't put himself or others in danger because he can't follow the protocol or is wandering off. He has done it before and I won't take any chances."

Jack froze. Daniel would say yes in a heartbeat. But Jack couldn't bring himself to allow it. Especially not after what had happened yesterday. He knew Daniel would be mad. But as much as he loved the kid and as much as he wanted him to have this cave and a dig site – he had to think bigger pictures here. 

"No. He's not ready yet," Jack said, knowing it would break Daniel's heart.

"How is he doing, Jack?" Hammond asked

"We had a few problems yesterday, but got around it," Jack replied carefully.

"Anything I should know about?"

"Well, sir… actually I think we can discuss this later. It's just about Daniel being… Daniel."

"I understand." There was a smile in Hammond’s voice. "Take care of our boy, Colonel. Hammond out."

 

 

Jack turned to look after Daniel and found him lying on the top step, his head on his pack, sound asleep. Very carefully he pulled the pack out from under the boy's head. He slung the straps over his right shoulder and picked Daniel up, cradling him in his arms. 

When he reached camp, he found Carter sitting at the fire, watching the video footage of the cave. She looked up when Jack sat down next to her, shifting Daniel around until he was lying comfortably, his head resting against Jack's right shoulder.

"Hey," he greeted her in a low voice "Hammond granted us two days."

"Two days? That's not much. Gared wants to explore the temple once again, too. Daniel knows how to get in there. We might need better camera equipment..."

"I'm scheduled to go to Washington in three." 

"Really? Why?"

"No idea yet." 

"Oh. So they'll send another team to continue our work – again. Daniel will be disappointed," Sam sighed.

"Yeah." Jack shifted Daniel once more to find a comfortable position for both of them. He should take him into the tent and put him in his sleeping bag. Daniel snuggled closer and buried his face in Jack's jacket, sighing in his sleep. 

Sam watched them for a moment. Then she reached out and brushed a tentative hand over Daniel's blond hair. "He looks so cute and small," she whispered.

"Don't you dare tell him that." Jack grinned.

"Don't worry. I want to live for a while," she smiled back, then got serious again. "Did you consider letting him go with the new team Hammond will send here?"

"Hammond did. I had to deny it."

"Maybe Teal'c or I can stay with them and keep an eye on him," she suggested.

"Carter, I don't think…"

"Sir, we know Daniel as good as you do. We can take care of him. And we won't let him get into trouble."

"I know, but…"

"With all due respect, sir. You don't trust us on this and I'd like to know why."

Jack stood and picked the kid up. Hugging Daniel closer to him, he said, "I’ll take him to bed."

"You don't want to share him," she accused him.

He stopped, glaring at her. "What?"

"Sorry, sir. But that's what it feels like. You don't want to share. You think you're the only one who knows how to deal with him. But we love him, too. And if I might speak freely, sir… hitting him isn't the right way."

"I didn't hit him. I spanked him. And we're okay about it, in case you haven't noticed."

"So explain the difference to me. Because last time I checked, spanking is the same as hitting. Daniel isn't a child and even if he was…"

"Daniel IS a child, Carter. And like it or not, when he starts to screw up like he did yesterday, I have to do something about it. And he knows that damn well."

"You can't hit him!"

"I didn't…"

"I don't care what you call it, sir."

Daniel stirred in his arms.

"Carter," Jack hissed, "Keep it down a little, will ya?"

"You should find other ways of getting through to him," she said in a calmer voice.

"Like what? Place him in a corner or let him write `I am not allowed to lie' a hundred times? You think that's less embarrassing for him? Or putting him on a kiddie leash?"

"You could have just talked to him. He's not stupid. He knows what he is doing."

"We did talk, Carter. Believe it or not. I didn't just beat the crap out of him and leave him there," he snarled and stalked off. Daniel was getting heavy in his arms and he didn't want to wake him up and hear them arguing.

"Sir!"

"Good night, Carter."

  
  


The colonel put Daniel in his sleeping bag after pulling off his shoes and jacket. Then he just sat there and watched him sleep.

"Oh, fuck," he muttered with feeling. 

As much as he wanted to be angry with Carter, he had to admit she might have a few points. He could trust her and Teal'c with Daniel. He knew he could. Well, he was 100 percent positive about Teal'c. Carter had issues. He wasn't sure if she really could put her foot down and protect him from himself even if it meant risking a tantrum or tears.

On the other hand… she was tough. Maybe if she was with him more often, she'd learn. 

Carter was the best 2IC he could get. But he had the feeling she was trying to pretend Daniel was still his old self. Which he wasn't. And if she couldn't see the differences, she would get a very nasty surprise eventually.

Jack knew Daniel's downsizing affected the whole team in more ways than one. They had to sort this out somehow. 

If Daniel agreed to counseling at least… maybe he'd learn to get his emotional side to work with his brain. Or how to get his childish side better under control? Jack thought if Daniel could learn to be more comfortable about being a kid and accepting his limits, they'd both benefit from it. It would give them more peace in their life together. And maybe Jack would learn how to give this new Daniel what he needed, without restricting his adult self too much.

He was running around in circles.

And he could see the next fight on the horizon already…

*******

"Two days?!” Daniel stared at Jack in disbelief.

"I'm sorry, Daniel. Hammond couldn't give us more. I have to be in Washington in three days and so…"

"They'll send another team, right? Just as they always do! We find something – I find something and then others get to explore it! You know, this has been making me mad for ages! We're always the first ones to be there, to pave the way for others. And then we leave and the next SG Team is doing what should be MY job! I am so sick of it!"

They were having breakfast at dawn. Daniel had been surprised when Jack woke him up so early. But now that he realized there were only two more days left, he knew why. Jack wanted him to have as much time as possible. 

In the uneasy silence following his outburst, Sam said quietly. "General Hammon d suggested you'd stay with the team that's assigned to continue this mission."

Daniel felt hope spark up. Was it possible… "Really? Why didn't you tell me right away. That's great," he said, looking at SG-1.

"Because you're not staying. That's why," Jack said curtly.

Daniel took a deep breath. He should have known. "Why am I not staying?"

"Take a guess," Jack challenged him.

"Because you can't stay with me to babysit," Daniel fired back.

"That would be yes."

"I offered to go with you," Sam explained.

"As would I," Teal'c added with a bow of his head.

Daniel looked from one adult to the other. "So where is the problem? That's cool. If General Hammond is saying yes, I don't see…" 

Sam shrugged and said, "Colonel O'Neill doesn't trust our ability to keep an eye on you."

"Carter!"

"Sorry, sir. But I think Daniel has a right to know. That he might lose this opport unity becaus e you are not willing to…"

"That's enough! You're out of line, Major."

"I agree. Why is it that you fear DanielJackson will not be safe with us?"

Daniel couldn't believe what he was hearing. They were fighting over him. "Please," he said, "...can't we talk about this? Jack? Sam?"

But no one was listening to him. Jack stood and barked, "I told Hammond Daniel's not ready and that's it. He is not staying with another team!"

"I can't see why you shouldn't let him stay! At least when Teal'c or I are with him."

"He is not staying, Carter. This discussion is over."

"O'Neill, I would prefer to hear DanielJackson's opinion about it. He has a right to have a say in this matter," Teal'c pointed out.

Daniel gulped. Finally somebody remembered he was here, too. And that he wasn't brain dead either. "Okay, um… Jack…can we talk about this for a minute? Alone?"

Jack glared at him as though he was going to yell. But finally he just groaned under his breath and nodded. "Tent."

As soon as they were inside, Jack began to rant, "Don't start, Daniel. I won't take responsibility if you get lost or in any other trouble just because I'm not there to watch your six."

"Sam and Teal'c…"

"Carter is far too insecure about how to deal with you. You are going to talk her into anything."

"I'd never do that," Daniel objected, knowing it wasn't true.

"Oh really? You lied to me, for crying out loud! How do I know you won't do it to her too, if it seems like a good idea at the time? You are even lying to Hammond!"

"What? I never…"

"What was that you told him yesterday, Daniel? About the reasons why we were late? And it wasn't the first time you stretched the truth."

"But… but that was… I…"

Jack slapped a hand over his face and groaned. When he spoke again, his voice was softer. "Look, I know why you're doing it, and… I understand. But, Danny, as long as I can't be sure you're reliable and follow leads off world, I can't let you go. It's hard enough for me to keep you grounded. And Carter has issues."

Daniel could hear how thin his own voice was when he asked, "What about Teal'c? Teal'c won't let me wander off and he won't allow me to get into trouble. You don't have to worry, Jack. Say yes, please. Teal'c can do it. And I really… I would love to stay here."

Jack didn't say anything for a long time. Daniel tried to read his face, but wasn't able to. Part of him wanted to beg and bug him as long as it took to make him say yes. But he had his pride. He had already been begging and he wouldn't give in to the urge to do more pleading. He bit his lip and waited.

"You really want this, do you?" Jack finally asked, his voice not giving away anything.

"Yes. I really want this. This is what I do, Jack. What I love to do. It's what I am."

"More than going to Washington with me, I guess."

"Don't be offended, but… yes."

"You sure? I bet the hotel has a pool and great room service."

Daniel blinked. "Does that mean I can stay? With Teal'c?"

"Our big friend will regret he ever offered. You will go by the book and if I hear any complaints about your attitude or any stunts you pulled, this will be the first and last time you ever go with another team. Do we understand each other?“

“Yes.“

“And if you think you can get away with any… woooaaahh!"

Daniel threw himself at Jack, knocking them both over. Sitting on his chest, he bounced up and down. "YES! Thank you! You're the GREATEST, Jack!"

"You're killing me, Wretch!" Jack yelled, choking for air.

Daniel bounced some more, laughing. 

"Get off! I'm not done with you! I'm going to give you a list of warnings and …OW!" Jack grabbed Daniel around his waist and lifted him up over his head so high, Daniel felt the fabric of the tent at his back. 

"Stooop…the tent will collapse," he squealed and wriggled his legs and body to get free.

"Are you going to be a good archaeologist," Jack asked wriggling his long fingers in Daniel's side while he was still holding him in the air. Daniel started giggling hysterically, kicking out at the tents poles accidentally. The tent started to sway dangerously and Jack finally let him down.

"I'm going to kill Teal'c if anything happens to you, though."

"I'll be fine," Daniel promised.

"Let's go and break the news to them. And then we have to talk to Hammond," Jack ordered.

  
  



	3. Off World Trouble - The Hidden Village

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Daniel's plans to stay with SG-6 get busted, he's heartbroken. But then SG-6's civilian consultant has an offer to make Daniel can't resist...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of you might know Adam Pierson from the "Highlander" TV Show. He's going to be part of this universe now, but this isn't a real crossover with Highlander, only in bits and pieces :)

**The Hidden Village**

**I**

Two hours later, Daniel was sitting at the backside of the black temple, his head resting on his drawn up knees. There weren't any angry tears left. He hiccupped, his body shaking with cold shivers. But the tears were gone. He pressed his face against his knees. His glasses were lying somewhere next to him. He didn't care. He was exhausted, empty, alone. What a great day. It had sounded all so good. Too good to be true as he now knew.

They had talked to Teal'c and Sam right after Jack had given his permission. Sam had been a little hurt, but happy for Daniel anyway. Teal'c had accompanied them to the gate, to talk it through with Hammond. The whole time on their way Jack had been bitching about giving whoever was going on this mission with Daniel a special briefing about how to deal with Doctor Jackson and what nasty consequences would follow if said Doctor Jackson was not returned home safe and sound.

Daniel had been in a far too good mood to even listen to all of it. Teal'c had just smiled totally unfazed by Jack's growling and mutterings.

And then they had met SG-6 half way.

Colonel Michaels had come through to escort Teal'c back to the gate. Bra'tac had asked for his assistance. He wanted him to meet a new Jaffa warrior, the former first prime of Imhotep. Daniel had heard of him before. His name was Kytamo and he'd become a major figure in the Jaffa rebellion. He was leading a whole army of Jaffa and now he had asked to meet Teal'c.

Michaels had order to bring SG-1 back to Earth ASAP since this looked like a major breakthrough for the Jaffa rebellion. If Teal'c and Bra'tac were able to establish negotiations with this powerful group of warriors, SG-1 would visit their outpost to talk to Kytamo about an alliance.

Daniel didn't know the full story behind this. All he knew was that Teal'c wouldn't be here to stay with him on the planet. And SG-1 would go on a mission without Daniel soon. He would stay on base and nobody was talking about his discovery anymore. There were more important things to do now. Like fighting Goa'uld.

Who cared about Daniel Jackson's cave or a dead civilization?

Jack had been busy all day, breaking up camp and putting things in the hands of Michaels and his team. Daniel didn't bother to ask again if he could stay on the planet with SG-6, alone. Jack wasn't going to allow it. And there was absolutely nothing Daniel could do about it.

This was so unfair.

"Daniel?"

He buried himself deeper in the shadows of the temple.

"Danny?"

"Go away," he whispered without looking up.

He heard the rustling of clothing when Jack sat down next to him. A calloused hand ruffled his hair, but Daniel jerked away from it.

"I'm sorry," Jack said gently.

"No you're not. You didn't want me to stay in the first place. Leave me alone."

"We have to go and tell Kink-ah we're leaving. And I thought you'd want to say goodbye to your friend."

"I don't want to say goodbye. I want to stay."

"I know."

Daniel took in a deep breath and finally looked up at his friend. "I am the only one who could go into that temple, you know. I'm little. I can go in there. Nobody else can."

"Then nobody will. Because you are not sticking your nose in there."

"If you'd put me on your shoulders, I should be able to get in," Daniel went on.

"Not gonna happen."

"Give me a zat. I know how to fire a zat. If anything attacks me…"

"I know you know how to fire a zat. The answer's still no."

"It's all your fault," Daniel yelled, suddenly overwhelmed by his anger, "Hammond would've allowed me to stay with SG-6 if you hadn't told him I wasn't ready!"

"We have been through this. It's not my fault they ordered us back."

"You know what, Jack?! I think Sam is right! You just don't trust anyone! You will never trust anyone with me! I'm not your pet! I can take care of myself! And just because I screwed up once, doesn't mean I'm gonna do it again! You can't keep me leashed to you all the time!"

"I'm not keeping you leashed to me, Daniel. But I have to make sure you're safe."

"And Michaels can't keep me safe? Because? He is as trained for this as you are, Colonel O'Neill. I won't do anything but dig here! What is your damn problem?"

"Well, he's not Daniel-trained the way I am, for starters.”

“Not funny.”

Jack sighed. “Look, next time things might be different...”

“Spare me the pep talk,” Daniel snarled.

“Right. I'll go back to camp and wait there for you," Jack said quietly and stood.

"You don't own me! And I will never ever agree to the adoption! Because I don't want to be your lifetime prisoner! You are just being possessive of me. You have been possessive before and you'll never stop!"

"You can yell all you want. You're not talking me into anything. It's not working. Not after the stunt you pulled recently," Jack replied, his voice still quiet.

"I hope you are happy now, O'Neill," Daniel spat.

There was no answer and when he finally looked up, Jack was gone.

Good.

Hopefully he was feeling real bad now. As bad as Daniel felt. He wanted Jack to know how much he hated this. All of it. The whole situation. His whole so called new life. He simply hated it. Wherever he went, he was running into walls. This was almost as bad as his first childhood had been.

He didn't know how long he'd been sitting there in the shadows of the temple wall, when someone cleared his throat. Daniel looked up to see a man standing not far away. He recognized him as Doctor Pierson, the civilian consultant of SG-6.

"You are Doctor Daniel Jackson," the man said simply, a note of curiosity in his voice.

"No. I'm just Daniel. Doctor Jackson is dead," Daniel answered sullenly. He didn't want to talk to Pierson.

"I'm sorry to hear that, Just Daniel." Pierson moved a little closer. Daniel blinked up at him. Pierson wasn't as tall as Jack, but somehow he was an impressive person. Lean and wiry. Sharp brown eyes with some green in them. Daniel had met him a few times at the SGC but they had never really worked together.

"I saw your work. I am impressed," the man with the British accent said.

"Why? We just videotaped some walls, that's all. You are going to do the real work," Daniel sniped.

"I mean all your work."

"It's not my work. It's my uncle's work."

"Of course it is," there was a shadow of a smile around his mouth.

"Did Jack send you to get me?"

"No. Your Jack is talking to Michaels right now."

"He is not "my" Jack," Daniel snarled.

"Whatever. I was looking at this temple and wondered how to get in there," Pierson said, thoughtfully scanning the black walls with his eyes.

Daniel shrugged. "The little people used the small holes. They climbed up with ropes. But adults are too big to get through."

Pierson came over and bent in his knees to be on the same eye level with Daniel. "Well, Just Daniel… How do you know that?"

"It was on the drawings I found in the cave. Baxter can show you the footage."

"He gave me the camera. I hadn't had time to look at it, yet. What can you tell me about the temple? Were you able to read the writings on the walls?"

"No. It's a language I haven't seen before. It's Norse related, or so I thought. But I'm not entirely sure," Daniel explained, still sullen and not sure he wanted to talk to this guy.

"It is very old. And it is a Norse dialect. But not quite. It is… do you know about the Yggdrasil?"

"It's the World Tree, according to Norse mythology. It's also sometimes called Mimameid or Lerad. It's a gigantic tree, an ash or yew tree. It connects all the nine worlds of Norse cosmology."

"That's right. You know how the worlds were named?"

"Àsgard, Álfheim and Vanaheim rested on the branches of Yggdrasil. The trunk was the world-axis piercing through the center of Miogaro, around which Jotunheim was situated, and below which lay Nidavellir or Svartálfheim. The three roots stretched down to Helheim, Niflheim and Muspelheim," Daniel shared reluctantly.

 

 

"You're really smart, Just Daniel," Pierson said, smiling. There was a twinkle in his eyes that reminded Daniel of Jack somehow.

He watched as Pierson got up again and started touching the writings on the wall. "We know the Asgard," the man said, thoughtfully. "But they are not important right now. We have to concentrate on Svartálfheim if we want to know something about these 'little people'."

Daniel stood slowly and stared at SG-6's civilian consultant. Tipping his glasses up his nose he wrinkled his brows. “Svartálfheim was the land of the dwarfs. The 'little people' are dwarfs from Germanic mythology? That's ... that's..."

"They weren't really dwarfs. But the mythology said they were. They lived under the earth at the roots of the tree Yggdrasil. So goes the myth. But they were a race, like the Asgard."

Daniel shook his head. "But... they weren't part of the big alliance against the Goa'uld. So they are not the Furlings."

"No, Daniel. They're not the Furlings. No one has seen the Furlings in a very long time. You are right. They weren't part of the alliance. They were called the Svartál."

"How... how do you know all this? I never read anything about a race called the Svartál."

Pierson smiled at him. "Let's just say, I have my sources. Good ones."

Daniel's eyes narrowed. He took a step back. "Who are you working for, Pierson?"

"For the SGC, like you do, Just Daniel."

"I don't believe you. You can't know all this without knowing the language. And we never found this kind of writings before on other worlds," Daniel argued. He wished he had his radio to call Jack.

"Maybe I didn't have to go to another world to find writings like this. Maybe I saw them on Earth," Pierson explained, the little smile back on his clean shaved face.

"Where?"

"I can't remember."

"You're working for the NID," Daniel whispered. He felt his mouth go dry.

"No, I'm not. But, Daniel... do you want to go into the temple?"

"What? No. I mean, yes. But I'm not allowed to. And I'm not sure what you want from me, Pierson," he said.

"Jack, huh?"

"What?"

"Listen, young Daniel Jackson. There's a golden statue of the Yggdrasil inside the temple. And it could make you big again."

"Wh…?" Daniel stared into Pierson's hypnotic eyes, feeling his blood drumming in his ears.

"All you have to do is go down there and get it. We'll figure out how to turn you back into your old self again. We have to read the instructions on it."

"You're kidding me. There's no such thing in there. And by the way, I don't know what you're talking about. I'm just a kid," Daniel said hastily. But his heart was pounding and he wanted to believe.

Wanted to believe so badly... oh god…

"You are just a kid and I'm just an archeologist," Pierson said mildly.

"You are not? An Archeologist, I mean?" Daniel blinked, confused.

"Do you want to go in the temple or not?"

"I…"

"I'm not involved with the NID. I didn't even know about your problem until recently. But now that we've met and I happen to be here I think, I can help you."

"How do you know about me? You are not supposed to know. Only very few people know," Daniel breathed, feeling a little uneasy.

Who was this guy?

"You're a very special person, Daniel Jackson. And I want to help you get back your old self. You have to trust me."

"I have to ask Jack." Daniel murmured, taking another step back.

"Jack won't let you go. Jack doesn't understand how important this is, Daniel. He worries too much and he wouldn't believe me."

"I don't believe you either, " Daniel said.

"Yes, you do. Come on. I'll put you on my shoulders. There shouldn't be anybody down there. They are long gone. Once you've found the statue, you come back to the entrance and call. I'll send down a rope for you and pull you up."

"No. I can't change it back. Nobody can." Daniel could hear the hope and fear in his young voice. He wanted to run. He wanted to forget what this Doctor Pierson was telling him. There was no statue. It was a trick to get him into the temple for some reason.

Pierson was with him before he could turn and run. He put his hands on Daniel's shoulders, his slender fingers, rubbing in soothing motions, as he spoke, "It is meant to be. This statue is very valuable. And it's said there's magic in it. To give the dwarfs power. And to make them big. It can help you to get your adult life back."

"Wh…why do you want to help me? Where do you have the knowledge from?"

"I know a lot about mythology. I'm an archeologist and an anthropologist. I studied the old Norse myths. They were my field of expertise for some time. And you have to trust me. I won't do you any harm."

"I need a rope," Daniel said softly, his voice shaking.

"I want you to get up there and take a look first. There might be stairs. If not, I'll get a rope."

"Jack is going to be so mad," the boy murmured.

"I'll talk to Jack if he gets mad," Pierson promised. "We are old friends, you know."

"Friends?" Daniel didn't like that. Somehow the way Pierson said it, it didn't sound like they were friends. There was something in his voice. Something sarcastic. A tone, Daniel knew too well, because Jack was using it from time to time.

"Well… we know each other. He is giving you a hard time, isn't he?"

"Oh… yes." Suddenly Daniel remembered he was mad at Jack O'Neill. And he didn't care about Jack's paranoia. He could take a glimpse inside this temple. Jack wouldn't even know.

If Pierson was right about the statue… if it was true…then Daniel wouldn't be little any longer. He felt his hands shake as he grabbed the flashlight, Pierson held out to him.

"All right then. You have the light. Here is my camera. I want you to tape the walls or anything you find in there."

Daniel put the cam and the lamp into his jacket. Pierson scooped him up and placed Daniel's feet on his shoulders while Daniel's hands were searching for something to hold onto. "Wow. Can you move a little closer… I want to have a better view…"

When Doctor Pierson shifted his position, Daniel could stick both arms into the hole. He pulled himself up on his toes and peered into the darkness. While he waited for his eyes to adjust to it, he felt Pierson grab his calves and then he was lifted high enough to pull up one knee and then the other. A moment later he was kneeling in a narrow passage.

"Daniel? Can you see anything?" Pierson's voice floated up from outside.

"Wait." Daniel waved the flashlight in the darkness and crawled a little further into the passage. There was nothing but rock walls around him. He couldn't see anything else. "I have to crawl a little further…"

"Don't go too far," Pierson sounded alarmed now.

"No. I just…" Daniel didn't know how it happened or why he hadn't seen it. All of a sudden he was losing his balance.

He was falling.

No, he wasn't falling.

He was sliding. Faster and faster, he was going down a narrow chute, bumping his elbows and head against the walls. He held on to the flashlight and closed his eyes, the blood rushing in his ears and his heart pounding in his small chest.

When the slide ended, he just lay there and waited for his head to stop spinning.

It was very quiet down here.

He took a deep breath. The air was dry and stale. Daniel started moving his arms and legs, then patted down his ribs and belly. He let out a yelp when he realized his left hand was hurting. He held up his hand to examine it, but couldn't see a thing. It was completely dark around him. And he had lost the flashlight on his way down.

Where was the light? He hoped it wasn't broken. Going on his knees, he started to crawl around until his fingertips touched something solid which turned out to be the flashlight.

Daniel switched it on and squeezed his eyes shut when the light blinded him for a moment. He looked at his hand and spotted some scratches. But it also hurt like it was sprained or something. He must have hit the walls when he'd come down that slope or whatever it was.

He'd come down some kind of pipe or slide. He knelt down in front of it and let the beam of the light shine into it. He couldn't see the end. There was no daylight. Clearing his throat he yelled, "Doctor Pierson! Hello?! Can you hear me!"

There was an answer, but he couldn't understand the words.

Why hadn't he taken his radio with him? Daniel realized he'd left it in his tent along with his vest. It should've been attached to his jacket. He groaned. Today wasn't his day, apparently. Now Jack had another reason to kick his ass.

He yelled again, telling the man outside he was okay. Again he heard something, but couldn't make out the words.

Sighing, he realized he had to wait until Pierson brought a rope.

In the meantime he decided to take a closer look at his surroundings.

He figured he was in some kind of hallway. There was nothing on the walls; no pictures, no signs, no writing. The corridor was large and the walls were of the same black stone as the temple. He saw two more holes in the wall and found out they were exits to more slides coming from above. He then found another hole and hoped there would be steps. But when he crawled into it he discovered that the steps – if there had been any – were destroyed. A wall of rubble and stone was all the hole led to.

Daniel licked his dry lips as he was wondering where the corridor would take him.

There was no sign of a statue, though. Just dust and darkness. Pierson said it should be here somewhere. Maybe he should just walk a few steps into the corridor.

But it would be smarter to wait until Pierson was back with help.

And then Jack would be there and insist that Daniel come up with or without the statue. Oh, and Jack was probably going to spank him again. Daniel swallowed, his hands automatically rubbing the dusty seat of his pants.

However, if he was able to find this statue and tell Jack there was a way to make him big… Jack couldn't deny it was worth the trouble, right? He would be mad anyway. But if Daniel could grow up, Jack would forgive him in a heartbeat and they could…

They could be together again.

Like they used to be.

Maybe it wasn’t too late for that after all.

Daniel's hand tightened around the flashlight as he started walking.

He wasn't sure how long he'd been wandering the dark hallway. He felt his stomach grumble and he was thirsty. He tried very hard not to think about the fact that he was all alone down here and nobody was able to follow him. And what Jack would think when he wasn't there to take the rope?

Right. He'd worry about that later. First he had to find that statue.

Provided there was a statue.

There were no turning points. Just one endless corridor. No signs of writings or any hint to where it was leading. Daniel stopped every couple of steps to knock against the walls. Maybe there was a hidden chamber or something. But all he found was solid rock.

Then, after another endless amount of wandering, he could see lights. Finally.

He started walking faster, ignoring how tired he was.

The light became brighter.

Daniel was sure it was daylight. That was good. If he was out of here, he'd find a way back to camp or the village instead of having to run all the way back.

He was angry by now. Pierson had been wrong. There was nothing down here. No statue or anything. And he'd be in so much trouble… He was already thinking of ways to deal with Jack's anger, when he stepped out of the corridor and into the light.

Daniel just stood there, his flashlight forgotten in his hand, gaping at the sight before him.

There was no daylight.

The corridor had led into a huge cavern. He had no idea where the light was coming from, but it appeared to be artificial sunlight, coming from high above. Only there was no sun. Just yellow stone walls, where the sky was supposed to be.

Deep below the point where he stood paths wound their ways through the landscape. There were lakes in deep craters. And trees. There were trees growing in this cavern.

He blinked.

It was a world inside a mountain. He could make out little loam houses similar to the ones on the surface. Bushes were growing at the lake's shores. And lots of rocks everywhere. Everything was just like on the surface. Only much smaller. Like a world for…

"Little people… the Svartál," Daniel whispered in awe.

Maybe Pierson had been right. Maybe there was a statue.

He continued down the path into the valley, carefully watching his step. It was steep. And the loose stones almost had him trip and fall a couple of times. Daniel felt sweat cooling on his face. He was anxious and excited at the same time. Would he actually find living people here? Had they been hiding all those years from the surface? And why had they retreated to live inside the mountain?

 

 

 

When he came closer to the bottom of the valley, he could see things in more detail. His heart sank at what he discovered now. Once there had been fences around some of the meadows. But they were all rotten and broken. The houses were mere ruins, the roofs had holes and some of the walls were damaged. And over all there was this quietness like a thick blanket. He couldn't hear any birds or insects. It was deadly still.

 

Daniel wandered around in this ghost-world, feeling uncomfortable. His hand was throbbing and he was so thirsty. When he came across a small lake, he sat down at the shore to think. Was it safe to drink this water? He had no idea. It could be poisoned or just foul. Groaning, he closed his eyes. He had no backpack, no water canteen, no radio, no nothing. Only a flashlight and a video camera.

 

Well, he hadn't expected ending up like this. He had just been running away from camp to cry out all his rage and to be alone for a while.

 

He bent to sniff at the water. It smelled like any lake smelled. The water was crystal clear like the lakes on the surface. Daniel put his glasses next to him and splashed water over his dusty sweaty face. It was cool and refreshing.

 

And he was so thirsty.

 

With a sigh he moved his hands together like a bowl, and drew a little water into his mouth. He let the water linger for a moment and then swallowed it. It tasted good. Daniel drank a little more, but not too much.

 

If he got sick now…

 

But he pushed that thought aside. He had the choice to get sick or die of thirst. What was he supposed to do? Dying from thirst wasn't really appealing.

 

Feeling refreshed, he stood and went back to the path.

 

He reached the first two houses of this odd village and decided to approach with care. Crouching on hands and knees behind a stone wall, he peered around the corner and observed the ruins. There were holes in the wall and no door. But who could tell what was lurking inside. In the dark. Could be some humanoid creature or a wild animal. Something alien. Anything.

 

Daniel felt a chilly shiver running down his spine.

 

What was he going to do?

 

Sit and wait? And for how long?

 

Go inside?

 

And if there was a… monster….

 

He shook his head. There were no monsters. Monsters were for babies.

 

But he knew that wasn't true.

 

Because Daniel Jackson had seen all sorts of monsters over the last five years.

 

They didn't even have to be ugly. They had glowing eyes, or were called the Destroyer of Worlds… or little techno bugs… alien monsters… they were real…

 

Daniel swallowed.

 

This was nonsense. There weren't Goa'uld on this world. And the Destroyer of Worlds was a new person now… techno bugs were in Thor's Galaxy… far far away… this was just a deserted village under the surface of a peaceful world.

 

He decided to explore the house in Special Ops mode. Holding the flashlight in his hand like a weapon, he sneaked through the high grass towards the building. His heart was so loud. Daniel knew nobody could hear it, but it was hammering in his ears like thunder.

 

 

Pushing all his thoughts away, he concentrated on what he was doing.

He crept to the door and peered inside, the flashlight ready in his hand. If necessary, he could hit any potential enemy over the head with it. It wasn't much protection, but it was all he had. He flared his nostrils to take in the stale dry air as he slipped inside. His ears searched for any sound, but all he could hear was his own shaky breath, so loud. Too loud. Whatever was waiting in there for him in the darkness, would hear it too.

_I'm not scared, I'm not scared… this is just exploring… there's nothing here… I'm not scared. I'm not a baby… I'm thirty four years old and there's nothing in there that could probably scare me._

Repeating this mantra over and over again in his head, Daniel bit down hard on his bottom lip and took a further step inside.

He clicked on the flashlight and let the beam wander over the walls and floor of an almost empty room.

He spotted a small table, a stool, and some broken jugs in an empty shelf. There were layers of dust everywhere. Daniel let the light dance over the floor to see if there were any footprints in the dust, but there weren't.

He felt his breath settle back to normal as he walked through the empty house. He entered another room, but found nothing other than dirt. There was no window, just a crack in the wall where some of the light from outside came through.

Daniel went back to the entrance and looked out at the grass and the stone wall he had come from.

Something was odd. He needed a moment to realize the light was fading. Whatever it was that made this place look like "outside," it was simulating a sunset now. And it was getting dark, fast. When he looked up at the sandy colored cave vault he saw large shadows.

He clutched the flashlight in his hand. He'd never find a way out of here in the dark and he had to spare the batteries of the lamp. So the only choice was to stay the night in this house. He could crawl into a corner and wait until the light came back.

That wasn't a big deal, right? All he had to do was go in there and find a place to sleep.

There were no animals and no other creatures as far as he knew. Just the houses, the lakes and the rocks. He would sleep a couple of hours and when it was morning again he would walk around some more. There had to be a way out of here somewhere. And if not, he could just walk the huge corridor back and try to crawl up that chute he'd come down.

Pierson had been right about the Svartál. There had been a civilization here once. Maybe there was a statue after all? If Daniel found it, he wouldn't come back empty handed. But he knew Jack was probably trying to find a way into the temple right now, outraged and worried.

Daniel should have waited until Pierson returned with a rope.

He watched the darkening "sky", weighing the pros and cons about running back right now and trying to find the path that led up to the hallway. If he got real lucky, they were trying to break through the walls somehow and would hear him. But it was real dark now and even with the flashlight he might slip on the path up the mountainside and fall. And if he broke a leg or an arm, he'd never be able to get up there.

He turned around, deciding to stay in the second room and sleep near the crack in the wall. That way he could see when the light returned and nobody would see him from outside. Decision made, he tried to find a comfortable spot in a corner near the crack.

But there was nothing to comfort him. No blanket, not even his pack to put his head on. He took off his jacket and rolled it up to use as a pillow. Then he lay there, staring up at the dark ceiling and listening to the stillness around him.

After a while he started to hear things.

Wind in the trees outside and the water of the lake splashing against the shore. It sounded unnatural. Daniel reminded himself he was in a cave and everything sounded different than on the surface. He curled up into a ball, feeling chilly and hungry, and his hand was still throbbing.

He was alone.

Alone in a ghost-world under a mountain.

Squeezing his eyes tightly shut he tried to think of something good. Something that would help him forget where he was and help him fall asleep. He was so tired. But all his senses were on alert. He had to distract himself.

Jack.

He needed to think of Jack. About something they had done when Daniel had been big. Because remembering that would make him feel better. If he could forget that he was little…

Just for a while…

He tried to remember what his apartment had looked like. All the artifacts and treasures he had brought with him from Egypt and other dig-sites he had worked on during his studies… and his piano… he had loved to play his piano… there used to be a nice tidy chaos...

He remembered the evening sun shining through his open balcony door, sending a bright yellow strip of light into his living room… he could picture himself sitting on his couch in the creamy sweater he liked so much and white pants… there was that ticking of the old wall clock… he could almost smell the coffee on the table in front of him… It had been a busy day and he was just glad to be home… he was so tired… so…

**II**

  


… _tired. He took a Tylenol for the headache that was beginning to spread very fast. He felt exhausted, but couldn't get himself to go to bed._

_There was too much on his mind right now._

_When there was a knock at his door, he didn't have to guess who it was. With a sigh Daniel went to open. Jack pushed past him without a word, marched right into his kitchen and opened the fridge. Daniel watched him as he pulled out a cold beer, opened it and downed half of it without taking a breath._

_"Jack, what are you doing here, aside from drinking my beer?" Daniel asked, irritated._

_"It's my beer. You keep it for me. You don't even like beer," Jack snarled._

_"Okay. But it's my fridge and my apartment and when you're coming over, you could at least say Hello before opening my fridge and drinking my, your, beer, whatever," Daniel objected, crossing his arms over his chest._

_"Hey, Daniel. Can I have a beer before I'm going to kill you?" Jack spat at him, sending a deadly look across the kitchen table._

_"Sure. Go ahead."_

_"Fine. Thank you."_

_Jack took another gulp of beer, still glowering at Daniel, who leaned against the wall next to the kitchen bar, looking back at him, waiting until the storm would pass._

_"You want me to order pizza?" he asked his angry friend. It was Friday after all. Normally they'd met at Jack's place for the pizza ritual. But this time, Daniel had thought Jack might need some time alone to get over their last mission. It seemed Jack had other plans, though._

_"Nope. I'm not hungry."_

_"Oh. Okay. So what are you doing here? Oh... I forgot. You came to kill me," Daniel stated mildly_

_"Damn right. I didn't manage to do that on P5S-381, so I thought I'd just come over and finish the job."_

_"Jack..."_

_"I just need to figure out how. I can't just blow you up, can I? Would be a real mess," O'Neill snapped._

_"You know I was right. You wanted me to give you another choice. That's what I did. You can't trade one life for another. They both had the right to…"_

_"The Enkaran were there first! Those other guys had no right to terraform a whole planet just because they didn't like the scenery! And I don't care what the reasons! I ordered you to…"_

_"You told me to give you another choice, Jack. I had to talk to Lotan and try to convince him to think outside of his programming."_

_"You knew I ordered Carter to blow it up! You were on that damn ship and you knew I was going to…" Jack dumped the bottle on the table and moved fast. Before Daniel could react, he was slammed against the wall, his hands over his head, trapped in a vice like grip. Jack was blocking him with his body, his face only inches from Daniel's._

_"I was going to kill you… I pulled the damn trigger! And if I'd blown up that ship you'd be fucking dead, Daniel!”_

“ _But I'm not. I'm not dead. Lotan removed the bomb...”_

“ _That's NOT the point! You went with him, KNOWING we were going to blow it up in about five minutes! And right now all I want to do is beat some sense into you… you…"_

_Daniel nodded, trying to ignore the anguish in those dark brown eyes before him. He had known Jack would be mad and he had just waited for him to come over to tell him so. "Jack, you admitted it at the briefing. We were able to save both races and there was no harm done. I'm still here and you can kick my ass from here to Chulak – but it won't change anything. It was the right thing to do," Daniel said quietly, his eyes never leaving Jack's._

_"I don't care if it was the right thing to do, Doctor Boy scout Jackson," Jack hissed._

_"Yes you do. It's your job to care. And you know saving those people was right. Both civilizations._ _We can't play gods. Just because we call ourselves the good guys doesn't give us the right to decide who is going to live and who won't."_

_"Daniel," Jack growled, slamming his hard body against him._

_"Look, Jack. I know you're mad at me, but…"_

_"Mad? I'm not mad! I'm freaking!"_

_"I'm here, Jack. I'm not dead," Daniel whispered. He didn't move. He didn't try to get his hands out of Jack's grip. He just stood there, feeling Jack pressing against him. LIKING how it felt, too._

_"But you could have been. And it would have been me, who did it, Daniel. ME! Don't you ever do something like that again…"_

_"I can't promise you that. And you know it. If I have to do it again, I will."_

_"Damn you," Jack yelled at him and then his lips crashed on Daniel's in a punishing harsh kiss, Jack's tongue invaded Daniel's mouth, forcing it wide open. He couldn't get his hands loose, but he bumped his groin against the other man's and felt their teeth clashing as their tongues were battling tongues for what seemed to be an eternity._

_When Jack finally broke for air, Daniel sucked in a breath and smiled at the outraged man in front of him. "Is that alive enough for you?"_

_"That's not pretty damn funny, Daniel," Jack huffed._

_"Let go of my hands, Jack."_

_"I haven't decided what to do with you, yet."_

_"You wanted to beat me. Remember? Kill me," Daniel murmured, pushing against Jack suggestively._

_"Yeah… kill you… later."_

_Jack's mouth was at Daniel's neck now, nibbling, biting and licking._

_Daniel moaned. He ripped his hands free of Jack's and grabbed the colonel's biceps, pulling him even closer. "Alive," he leered in Jack's ear, "not going anywhere."_

_"No… won't let you… never, ever…" Jack panted, nuzzling at Daniel's throat when he tipped his head back and closed his eyes._

_"Bedroom, Jack… show you how much alive I am," Daniel moaned, gripping Jack's shoulders tightly._

  


_Much later Daniel woke up to strong arms holding him. He could feel Jack's nose nuzzling his hair and smiled. He was aching everywhere and felt a little sticky, but it was just perfect. It was dark outside._

_"Hey." Jack nuzzled some more, then kissed the side of Daniel's head._

_"Hey yourself. Did you sleep?"_

_"Nope. Watching you sleep."_

_"Ja-ack."_

_"I like watching you sleep."_

_"Why? It's odd."_

_"No it's not. It's peaceful; you're peaceful when you sleep," Jack said, yawning._

_Daniel turned around in Jack's arms to look at him. His salt and pepper hair was spiked and there was a sated look on his friend’s face. Daniel loved this look. He was the only one who knew this look. The only one who was allowed to see Jack like this. The only one who could make Jack look like this after sex. Well, he was the only one who had sex with Jack, period._

_"Do you feel better now?"_

_"Mmh… would feel even better if you weren't such a stubborn bastard."_

_"I can't change what I am, Jack."_

_Jack was stroking his upper arms with his fingertips. "Neither can I."_

_"I know."_

_"I don't want this to happen again, Daniel," the colonel said, a serious expression on his face._

_"Jack, I…"_

_"No."_

_"So what are you going to do? Tie me to my desk? Because if we go out there together, something like this might happen again. And I would do it again. Not even you can stop me from doing something, if I am convinced it is the right thing to do," Daniel said._

_Jack took his face in his hands, caressing his eyebrows with both thumbs. "I know that, Daniel. But if something happens to you, I don't want to be the one who did it… don't put me through something like that again… I know we aren't safe and what we do can always cost us, but not like this."_

_"Actually... If it comes down to it, if I have to die out there, I'd rather it was you than Apophis though. Or any of the other..."_

_"I love you."_

_"Wha…?"_

_"Love you."_

_Daniel stared at the older man in amazement. Jack had never said it before. They'd been together for some time now, sharing their beds, having sex and just knowing about the love thing. Daniel had said it once or twice, maybe, but Jack had never said it back. Jack always just smiled and kissed him. Hearing it from him now was like a shock. And suddenly Daniel could see how scared Jack must have been, when he had realized that Daniel was on the Gadmeer ship._

_God…_

_"I love you too, Jack," he whispered, looking into those brown eyes. Daniel could see all of Jack in them, could look right into his soul. It was something Jack only shared with him, and only on rare occasions. Daniel kissed him and closed his arms around Jack's body to hold him. "Sorry," he murmured against Jack's face. "So sorry…”_

  


…"I'm sorry." Daniel rolled over on his back, wiping away the tears streaming down his face as he was coming back from a restless sleep. When he opened his eyes, he couldn't remember where he was.

Didn't he just cuddle with Jack?

He couldn't remember… he dreamed something… wasn't sure what it had been. But Jack had been there and told him, he loved him.

Slowly Daniel grew aware of the hard ground and the darkness around him.

Where was Jack?

Then it hit him.

Jack wasn't with him. He had climbed into the temple and slid down that chute… and now he was alone in this ghost-world. Nobody was here and it was still night. Daniel cradled his throbbing left hand against his chest and curled himself up again. He was so cold. And he missed Jack. As much as he tried telling himself it was only night and that it was relatively safe where he was... all he wanted was Jack to hold him and tell him that he would be okay.

**III**

"Daniel had permission to explore the temple?"

Jack, who was standing in the briefing room, staring out the window into the gate room, spun around to face General Hammond. "No. I didn't permit it. Actually, sir, he knew very well I didn't allow him to go in there."

"Doctor Pierson reported Daniel told him you gave him permission, Colonel," the general said, a deep frown on his face.

"It's a lie, sir."

"If Doctor Pierson isn't telling the truth in this matter, he might have lured Daniel into the temple for some reason. I don't know what to make of this. It's a very heavy accusation, Jack."

Jack turned back to the window. "It was Daniel," he sighed. "He lied. He did it before."

“Jack… Daniel might be a lot of things, but he has never been a liar," the general said gently.

But Jack knew better, didn't he? "Daniel… changed."

"I am aware of that. But I'm sure you would have reported if he'd become a serious problem off world, Colonel," Hammond answered, an unspoken question in his voice.

"We were handling it. Until recently," Jack replied flatly.

"You mentioned some issues when you reported in from the planet."

"Yes. Doesn't seem to be as simple as I thought."

Hammond was silent for a while. Finally he straightened himself and turned to look at O'Neill. "First priority is to find the boy and bring him home alive. I want you and Major Carter back on that planet after the briefing. Doctor Pierson will join you. I'll send Baxter with SG-7 to start the negotiations with Kytamo. I'm sorry I can't order Teal'c back. But my superiors don't think rescuing Daniel is worth interrupting whatever relationship we might begin with the newest hero of the Jaffa rebellion. On the upside I canceled the trip to Washington."

"I don't want Pierson on my team, " Jack objected, his voice just a little too sharp.

"Pierson is assigned to SG-6, Colonel. And he was there when Daniel got lost. He also recognized the language on those walls and that might be helpful in some way."

"Pierson helped him climb up there, sir.”

"Daniel lied to him, as you just pointed out."

"Daniel is seven! Would you help a seven year old to get into an unknown building just because he tells you it's okay? With all due respect, sir. Pierson acted irresponsible and…"

"And you let him out of sight, Colonel. You were responsible for Daniel."

"I was talking to Michaels and breaking up camp."

"While Daniel was alone near that temple. If you realized he wanted to go in there and he wasn't to be trusted because he had disobeyed your orders before or even lied, you should have taken him back to camp with you."

“Yes, sir.” Jack buried his hands in the pockets of his pants and continued to stare into the quiet gate room.

When the general spoke again, his voice was gentler. "It has been an unfortunate series of events. We need to make some serious decisions regarding Daniel when we have him back. Doctor Pierson should have called you to make sure Daniel was telling the truth. And you should have watched him more closely. But it happened. We have to concentrate on damage control now, Jack." When Jack didn't answer, Hammond continued. "Are you able to focus on your duty or does your concern for Daniel influence your ability to lead this search? If that is so, I'll put Michaels in charge."

"No, sir. I'm good."

Hammond put a hand on his shoulder, before he walked away. "We will find him, Jack."

"Yeah." Jack didn't move. He had to stay there anyway for the briefing.

God, he hoped Daniel was all right.

Nobody knew what was inside that temple. What if he was injured? They had dropped ropes through the holes into that black square building, hoping the kid would climb out on his own. He had thought of using C4 to blow it up. But that wasn't an option since Daniel would blow up with it if he was sitting somewhere in there.

They had tried breaking through the walls with no success. Carter was currently in her lab to put together some equipment, so she could make a more detailed analysis of the material. Since they weren't able to take samples from the walls, they had to do the tests directly in the field. There had to be a way to get through.

Or there had to be another entrance somewhere. If Pierson was really able to read the walls…

Jack gritted his teeth.

When he heard footsteps behind him, he turned to see Carter and Michaels enter the briefing room. His 2IC looked the way Jack felt. Tired and worried, dark circles under her blue eyes. He could tell she hadn't slept any better than he had. They had been back on base a few hours and after a first briefing were sent off to shower and get some sleep while SG-6 had tried to get in the temple. But sleep had been out of the question. Jack was constantly torn between being worried about Daniel and being mad at him.

Had he really thought he'd been too hard on the kid?

Right now he was beginning to think he hadn't been hard enough. He couldn't get his head around the fact that Daniel had lied again. Only two days after he'd promised never to do it again. Well, he hadn't exactly lied to Jack, but that wasn't the point here and Jack knew Daniel was well aware of that.

So if… no, _when_ he got Daniel back, he would put an end to this, once and for all. If it meant that he had to discipline Daniel harder or let him stay on base forever – so be it. He would not go through this again. Ever.

SG-6 entered the briefing room. They had returned to base for the briefing before they'd all go back to the planet to start the search.

Carter nodded at Jack as she took her place at the black and red table, shuffling through her papers. Michaels poured her a glass of water.

"Where's Pierson?" Jack asked.

"He should be here any minute, sir." Carter sounded exhausted and he felt a pang of sympathy for her. Jack sighed inwardly and made his way to the table, taking a seat opposite her.

Captain Reynolds and Simmer, the other two members of SG-6, joined them and a minute later Hammond returned from his office, waving at his officers to stay seated. "All right, people, let's get started. Where is Doctor Pierson?"

"I am here," the pleasant voice with the British accent came from the door. Jack watched Pierson stroll into the room. He sat down next to Carter, his brown green eyes focusing on O'Neill. "Jack."

"How very nice of you to join us, Doctor," Jack sneered.

"Yes, I thought I’d drop by."

They glared at each other over the table, until Hammond cleared his throat and sent a stern look towards O'Neill. When he had the full attention of all the people at his table, Hammond started. "Before we go into detail on how to rescue Daniel Jackson, Doctor Pierson requested to tell us what he knows about the planet and the temple Daniel is currently in. He felt it is important to let us know what might await us."

"I can't wait to hear it," Jack muttered under his breath.

"First off, you have been wrong. That temple you found on the planet isn't a temple," Pierson began bluntly. "It's a doorway to an underground world. I can translate most of the text Doctor Jackson and Doctor Baxter filmed in that cave and on the “temple“ walls. Daniel might not sit somewhere in the building and wait for us. I assume there is a way leading from the doorway to a place called Svartálfheim, where the so called 'little people' lived – or still live."

"You mean, there is a world down there? People live beneath the surface?" Carter asked, eyebrows rasied.

"Yes, Major. Or at least had lived. I'm not sure if there is anyone left. It's a very old civilization. Is anybody here familiar with Norse mythology?"

When nobody said a word, Pierson gave his fellow teammates a sardonic look. "Why am I not surprised? Well, I will enlighten you. According to Norse mythology, there were nine worlds in the cosmos. It was believed those nine worlds were connected by the world tree, named Yggdrasil. On the highest level were the two worlds, Asgard and Alfheim. The Asgard were known as northern gods and we all know they are not exactly that... However those were the two heaven worlds, also named godworlds. In the middle section of the tree, we find Jotunheim, the world of the giants and Midgard, also called Middleearth, which was the world were humans lived."

Jack let out a snort. "Yeah right. Next you tell us there's a little hobbit and a magic ring.“

"Oh. You read Tolkien? And I thought you military guys never read anything else than comics and porn – which I like, too, by the way," Pierson said with raised eyebrows.

"Well, surprise," Jack hissed back.

“Let's focus on the main subject here, Colonel. Doctor,” Hammond said sharply.

Pierson shrugged it off and continued his monologue. "Beneath the surface between the roots of the tree, there is a world called Svartálfheim. It's the world of dwarfs and black elves. There is a lower level with Hellheim, the underworld or hell, and a world of fire. But we have to focus on Svartálfheim. Because that is where Daniel might be now."

"It's a myth," Michaels said.

"Yes. It is. But the Asgard are real. And so are the Svartál. Let's go from the myth to reality now."

"About time," Jack muttered, earning another look from Hammond

Pierson didn't let that interrupt him. "There was once war between the Asgard and the Svartál. They were known a greedy, pugnacious race. And they lived on Earth in the mountains and caves. However, they weren't included in the big alliance against the Goa'uld because they couldn't be trusted and it was decided they had to leave Earth, go into exile and stay neutral. That's how the Svartál had left Earth and came to our nice little planet here."

"Are they related to the Ancients?" Carter wanted to know.

"No. We don't even know what their origin home world was. They used the Gate to reach Earth," Pierson answered.

"Why do you think they're no longer alive?" Michaels asked.

"Nobody has ever heard of them again in a very long time. Like the Furlings, they seemed to have vanished from the face of the universe. And as I said, they were known as greedy and hungry for power. So it would be very unlikely for them to just go underground and stay there. The Svartál would use the Stargate to travel to other worlds to trade and seek valuable things like gold and technology. They never built their own ships, but they were good traders and dealers."

Jack held up a hand to stop Pierson from rattling on. He knew when he had heard enough and years of dealing with Daniel had taught him there was a point where he had to step in or they'd still be sitting here in a fortnight.

"All right," he said briskly, "Thanks for the fairy tale, Pierson. Now let's focus on getting Daniel back. How do we get in there?"

"We won't."

"Yes. We will. Watch me," Jack said, gritting his teeth once more.

Pierson appeared totally unimpressed. "I will enjoy the show."

"The material is unbreakable. We never found anything similar to it anywhere else in the area. Of course there might be other places on the planet that have this kind of stone. But not as far as we know from what we get from the probes and the MALP," Carter pointed out. "We'll do more tests as soon as we return to the planet, but I'm afraid Doctor Pierson is right. We won't get into the building."

Michaels shook his head. "I think Daniel's already somewhere else. He must have found a path or a tunnel and wandered off. If he waited at the same spot where he went down, he would have seen the ropes we sent in there, along with the radio so he could call us if he's able to. So either he is already gone, or..."

"He might be injured and unconscious," Carter ended the sentence in a low voice.

"If there's an underworld of some sort, there might be another entrance to it, somewhere on the planet. Depends on how big the complex is," Hammond said.

Jack thought that over and replied. "Daniel had a friend on that planet. A little boy about his age. Maybe he knows something about that Underworld. Or his father does. He is the leader of the tribe that lives near the temple. That boy led Daniel to the cave he was so excited about."

Carter's eyes lit up with hope. "Yes, sir. That could be. Maybe somebody knows about those Svartál and if there's another way into their world. They couldn't read the language, but there might be a myth about those 'little people' they know about."

Hammond gave a firm nod. "You go back to the planet and talk to the natives. The temple has to be guarded, in case Daniel comes back and calls or is able to climb up the ropes himself. Colonel O'Neill is in command of the search party. I want you report back to me as soon as you know anything new. You have a go."

Jack looked around at the table. "Gear up and meet me in the gate room in thirty. Reynolds and Simmer, you'll guard the temple. Pierson, Carter – you're with me. Michaels, put a search party together to comb through the area around the temple, to see if we can find an external entrance. Dismissed."

***

When Daniel woke up, a bright strip of light was falling through the crack in the loam wall next to him. Groaning, he stretched his arms and legs and sat up, searching for his glasses. He found them lying next to him on the dusty ground. Daniel wiped them on his jacket and yawned. A loud grumble from his belly reminded him how hungry he felt.

Even MRE were a wonderful meal compared to, well, nothing.

He got up and went to the entrance to peer outside. The day was bright and for a moment he forgot he was inside a mountain. It looked so real. There was the grass, the rocks, the lake, and trees. He found a bush with red berries not far from the house. But he wasn't sure if those berries were edible, so he didn't try them.

He was going to return to the path leading back to the corridor.

Pierson had told him to look for a statue. But as far as Daniel could see, there was nothing down here. And he was hungry and hurt and he couldn't search the whole valley alone. As much as he wanted to find it, right now he felt very little and helpless. Daniel bit his lower lip in frustration. If only he had a clue where to look.

Again, he winced inwardly at the thought of all the trouble he had caused. He knew the procedure. There'd be briefings and search parties. And once they found out he wasn't severely injured, he would end up in Hammond’s office and it would be goodbye gate travel forever. Not to mention the little chat Jack would have with him. If he got lucky, Jack would be so happy to see him alive that he'd only yell a little. But somehow Daniel suspected he wouldn't be that lucky.

"Ouch," the boy muttered to himself and grimaced.

Well, at least he'd get something to eat as soon as they had rescued him. And maybe… maybe they could find another way into this valley. If he was able to convince Hammond to look for it. Because if there was really a statue that could help him to grow up again…

With a sigh, Daniel put his jacket on and looked around to find the way back. When he was sure he'd spotted the right path he passed the lake and trees, still missing the sounds of insects or birds in the air. It was so quiet. Only a light breeze in the trees or the splash of waves against the shores.

Half an hour later, he stopped to rest. He’d gotten nowhere. There was a light mist on the horizon where he assumed the mountain walls that enclosed this valley. But had he walked this far the other day?

He wasn't sure. There was another lake a few yards away and Daniel decided he needed something to drink at least. He went over and found a sandy beach. He pulled off his shoes and socks and waded into the shallow water. It was refreshing and he felt pebbles on the ground between his toes as he bent down, drew water into his hands and drank as much as he could.

Then he just stood there and let the water splash around his ankles. He wanted to swim. He felt sweaty and dusty and the crystal clear lake was inviting him to take a bath. But he had to go and find the right way.

And he was hungry. Swimming would only make him more hungry. With a last wistful look, he waded back to the beach and dried his feet with the sleeves of his jacket before he put his socks and shoes back on.

He gazed up at the "sky", seeing the fissured rock ceiling far above. He tried to find the light source, but couldn't spot anything but rocks.

When he looked back at the path in front of him, he froze.

A few yards away, a still figure stood, gazing at him.

Daniel blinked, wondering if he was hallucinating. Once he was sure the creature wouldn't vanish and wasn't just a product of his fantasy, he took a step forward and said, "Hello? Don't be afraid. I'm Daniel Jackson from the planet Earth. I mean you no harm. I… I am a peaceful explorer."

He held his hands up, showing the stranger his palms to signal that he was no threat.

The woman – Daniel was sure it was a woman – was a little shorter than himself. She wasn't exactly elf-like, but not really big either. Sturdy, maybe, with broad shoulders and short strong arms. She had long blond curly hair and her face was smooth and heart shaped. She looked human, with sparkling green eyes and full red lips.

Daniel couldn't make out how old this creature was. She looked like a child with the face and the eyes of an adult woman. Her feet were naked and dirty and what appeared to be a formerly white robe covered her body. Daniel couldn't see any weapons in the small hands. But he was aware how the wide robe was good for hiding something inside.

"Do you understand me," he asked.

"You are from the Midgard. Or as others call it, the Tau'ri," the stranger said. Her voice was light, the sound of bells. Daniel felt himself drawn to it. It was a beautiful voice. Like music.

"Y… Yes… um… I'm… Daniel."

"I am Svartil of the Svartál."

"Wow. I mean… that's… I didn't think there was anybody left here. Everything looks deserted," Daniel started talking fast. He knew he was babbling, but he couldn't stop it.

"I am what is left of the Svartál," the bell voice informed him with a hint of sadness in it.

"I'm sorry to hear that. How long… how long have you been alone here? And why didn't you go on the surface? There are people there. Friendly people."

Svartil took a few steps in Daniel's direction and stopped to look him over. Daniel noticed how shiny her eyes were. Like green diamonds. Cat eyes.

"I haven't been on the surface in decades. And I have been alone for decades."

"What happened to your people?"

"I am the only one who is left."

"Are you…are you a…dwarf?"

"I am Svartil."

"Oh. Okay. Um… can I… ask you a few questions?"

"Come. I will take you to my house. We can eat and talk there," Svartil offered in a friendly manner. As she smiled her eyes glittered almost blindingly.

He blinked a few times and nodded. Without any thought of finding his way back, he followed Svartil through the high grass into a small canyon and away from the path.

  


 


	4. Off World Trouble - S and R

**S and R**

**I**

Jack took off his sunglasses when the beautiful woman brushed away the colorful curtain hanging in front of the door to Kink-ah's home. Her hair was as white as everyone’s he had seen in the village. It was straight with red and blue beads plaited into it and reached almost down to her waist. She smiled at him in greeting and he couldn't stop himself from smiling back at her at least a little.

"Col-nel O-Nel," she greeted him in a hushed voice. "What is your wish?"

"I'd like to speak to your son, Tink-ah."

Her dark eyes widened in concern. "Did my son wrong? Has he caused trouble?"

"No, he didn't do anything. But we might need his help. We lost Daniel again and wanted to ask him if he's seen anything," Carter explained.

"You will find him at shore of village lake. He fishing. I hope you find your loss," Tink-ah's mother answered, the smile back on her face.

"Is chief Kink-ah here? We need to talk to him, too"

"He inside. Wait here."

They waited in front of the house, looking at the deserted streets. It was a quiet time of day. Most of the men and women were out in the fields or hunting birds. There was the smell of fire and cooked food in the air and from somewhere they could hear a child laughing. It was peaceful. It reminded Jack of Edora, where he had been stranded for three months, almost two years ago. 

He felt a short flicker of guilt when Laira's face emerged before his inner eye. He had promised to go back… and never did. He had talked to Colonel Richards, who was on the team that visited Edora on a regular basis, due to the mining treaty for Naquadah. According to him, Laira never gave birth to a child. And part of Jack had been disappointed, even though he was glad he didn't have to explain that to Daniel. Although, Daniel had known about his encounter with Laira and had forgiven him a long time ago.

Daniel…

He was ripped back into reality when the curtain behind him parted once more and Kink-ah stood before them. "You want talk to me, O-Nel?"

"Yes. We need your help again, Chief," Jack said bluntly.

"Come inside we talk. My wife told you lost child again?"

After they were seated on the soft furry pillows inside and Jack had put his long legs and quirking knees in a comfortable position, he explained the situation to the chief as the wife served tea in tiny jugs. 

When Jack was finished, Chief Kink-ah said something in his own language to his wife. She nodded and left the room. "We send warriors to find boy," the Chief said to O'Neill.

"Thanks, I appreciate it,” Jack said. 

“Forbidden by law to go near stone house. Little people never brought good. Those who became large died long ago.”

“Those who became large? As in... they turned from being little to being tall?” Carter asked, giving Jack a poignant look. 

Kink-ah nodded. “Legend.”

Jack pursed his lips. Was that why Daniel had gone in there? Because he'd find something to... but that wasn't possible, was it? He cleared his throat. “How did that work? How'd the little people got big?”

Kink-ah shrugged. “We do not know. It is said magic.” Before Jack could ask any further question, the Chief continued, “O-Nel, you should discipline son more.”

"Oh, believe me, as soon as I know he's okay, he's going to be damn sorry," Jack agreed, not even aware he wasn't correcting Kink-ah about Daniel being his son. He saw Carter’s smile fade. She pressed her lips together in a tight thin line and glared at him. 

Kink-ah nodded his approval. "He strong headed."

"Oh, yeah."

Jack ignored Carter for now. She could fume all she wanted. Daniel was going to get it. There was no way around it. He sighed. First they needed to find him uninjured and alive. 

Kink-ah's wife returned, holding something in her small hands. Kink-ah made an inviting gesture. "This gift. You use on son. He better."

Jack looked up and automatically held out his hands when the woman put a long slender object into them. He needed a moment to realize it was a tiny leather whip, too small for adults, but most likely made for children. 

Carter sucked in a sharp breath next to him. "Sir," she hissed. 

But Jack had already put it down as though he'd burnt his fingers. Shaking his head he said, "Sorry, Chief. That's a bit overboard, dontcha think?"

"Your son thank you one day."

"Nooo, I don't think so." He felt the hair on his neck rise. Daniel would be punished, oh yes. But not like this. Only the fact they needed Kink-ah's help to find Daniel kept Jack from making some very nasty comments about this "gift."

"As you wish. I offer help." Kink-ah got to his feet in a smooth movement. If he was offended, he hid it well.

Jack stood without too much pain in his knees and ushered Carter out of the house, giving the man only a short nod when they parted. 

Out on the street, he started walking fast. Carter fell into step with him. They didn't talk until they had left the center of the village and the lake came in sight. When Jack slowed down, he felt her eyes on him. 

"I'm glad you didn't take that… thing. I mean, maybe you should have, just in case it's violating some weird customs if you refuse to take a gift… but… really, I’m glad."

"Carter, give me a break here. You don't seriously think I'd whip Daniel."

"No, I don’t."

"I mean, I wanted to. Wen he was big, you know. He's so damn stubborn," he tried to crack a joke. But it fell flat. Neither of them was laughing. He kicked a stone and watched it jump up and down a few times. "Crap. That was weird."

"Sir… I think I have to tell you something. About Daniel," Carter blurted out.

"Do I want to hear it?"

"No, I guess not. But I think I have to tell you anyway. Did Daniel ever mention to you he had been in foster care most of his childhood?"

"He doesn't talk about it much, but it's in his file. And yeah, he mentioned it." Jack was wondering where Carter headed with this. But he had the feeling he  _really_ didn't want to hear it. 

Carter, however, had no mercy. She brushed a few blond strands of hair out of her face. "After the events with the gamekeeper, on P7J-98. When we were trapped in that…"

"What about it?"

"Well, Daniel saw his parents die over and over again. When we were back home, we met and had a few drinks together. You know how fast Daniel gets drunk… got drunk," she said, a sad smile playing around her lips.

"Yes. Loved to see him a little tipsy, " Jack answered, smiling absently. Tipsy Daniel had been good. Very good. But his smile and the memory faded when she continued.

"I don't know how, but we started talking about that gamekeeper and his parents’ death. And he told me about foster care. Sir… I think Daniel has been abused as a kid."

Jack felt cold all of a sudden. "What did he tell you, Carter?"

"Not much. But he mentioned he ended up in the hospital at least once and that he changed homes a lot. He also said that..." her voice trailed off and she watched her boots.

Jack stopped walking and touched her arm. "What?"

"That he always ended up being sent away. Even from the homes he liked. He said it felt like he was never able to do anything right for anyone. That people always expected him to be somebody else… that's why I… I don't want you to change him. I know you love him and you want to protect him, sir. But he is still Daniel and… and I think we don't have the right to press him into patterns just because he's little now."

"I'm not trying to press him into... what was that... different patterns? Daniel is Daniel. He'll always be. But he’s different now. And I have to draw the line for him. I'm not going to tolerate lying or wandering off. Nor do I allow him to get himself or others in danger. He always walked a fine line with his attitude, but he always knew that line. Now he's overstepping it and if he isn't listening with his ears, my hand does the talking to his butt. I can handle things differently at home. But out here, I have to think and act fast. And Daniel knows that."

She drew a deep breath. "It's just so hard to hear him cry…. I'm not used to that. He used to be so strong and he's been through so much. I don't know how you can be so strict with him. I always see our Daniel and when I heard him that night… and with what I know about his childhood… I was mad. Don't tell him I told you about this. He made me swear not to tell you… but I think you need to know." 

Jack sighed and did something he very rarely allowed himself to do. "C'mere," he soothed and opened his arms for her. She hesitated only a second before she let him hug her, leaning her head against his shoulder. 

They stood like this for a minute. He held her tight as he whispered, "Do you have any idea how hard this is for me, Sam? Seeing him struggle with everything he does? Do you have any idea how helpless I feel most of the time? I can do so little… and how do you think I feel when I have to discipline him? It sucks, big time. It just seems I have no choice sometimes."

He felt her arms sneak around his middle and thought about stepping away. But somehow he couldn't. She was holding him now and it felt surprisingly good. Her hands patted his back and he dropped his chin on her head, closing his eyes and let her comfort him, let her hug him, to give him back some of his strength. He had almost forgotten how it felt to be the one being held. 

When he had been with Daniel, they'd always held each other. They had both needed that. The connection, the warmth and the knowledge the other was there at night when one of their demons hunted them. Or after a mission had gone terribly wrong. Or just because. 

Nowadays Jack was holding Daniel and as much as he loved the kid and wanted to be there for him, he always suppressed his own need for comfort. Carter wasn't Daniel, but she was here and she had been his friend for so long. He owed her the trust she deserved.

"Let us help… Jack," she said, her voice barely audible.

"Okay." The team had been through a lot of crap, had suffered a lot ever since Daniel got downsized. Maybe it was time to rebuild the connection, to renew the family bonds they'd always shared. 

"I am getting used to him like this. Just give me a chance."

"I will…. And, Carter, none of this is your fault, okay? Just because we can't fix him this time, doesn't mean we can't live with it, or at least try."

Her head was still at his shoulder and her voice shaky, when she asked, "How do you… cope with the… loss of the love?"

“I didn't lose the love,” he said.

“No, I know. But it's different now.”

It was good that they weren't looking at each other. Jack figured they could only talk about this while they both felt so vulnerable and fragile. "Do you ask?" he challenged her quietly.

"I just want you to know that… Teal'c and I… we wouldn't ask, and you don't have to tell… but if you want to talk…"

"Maybe… one day."

Her voice got steadier when she spoke again. "And we are going to find him. He is okay. He has to be, right?"

"Yeah. He's Daniel. That pretty much covers it."

"Right," she grinned.

"Right." 

After another moment of silence, he very carefully pulled away. When he looked into her eyes, he knew they were okay again. More okay than they'd been in a long time. "Thanks."

She smiled and when they stepped away from each other Jack felt b etter than he had in ages. He should remember how good a simple hug could be from time to time. With new confidence he said, "So. Let's find that kid, shall we?"

"Sure. Are you going to talk to him? I'd like to talk to some of the women around here if you don't mind. Maybe they know something, too," Carter said briskly, her old self again.

"Go ahead. And keep me posted."

He watched her leave and went to the lake to look for Tink-ah.

The native little boy was throwing stones into the lake, obviously trying to make them jump. His long hair was held together by a string of leather. When Jack reached him, he heard him mumbling something in his own language. It sounded as though the boy was frustrated. The stones he kept throwing went down without a single jump.

"You need flat stones for that," Jack said. He looked around and found a nice yellow stone. He picked it up and threw it. 

Tink-ah watched with wide eyes as it skipped three times before it sunk. He turned to Jack and smiled shyly. "You show me?"

"Sure. Here. Take this one… weigh it in your hand like this… yep… now you need a steady arm… right… it has to come down in a certain angle…" 

Tink-ah threw the stone and it skipped twice. "Cool," the kid said with feeling.

Jack had to laugh. "Cool?"

"Dan-el teach me," Tink-ah said proudly.

"Ah. Yes. He's good at that. Languages." Even though "cool" wouldn't have been Daniel's first choice of words to teach when he had been big. 

Now the impression on Tink-ah's face grew worried. "Dan-el lost. He found? He in trouble?"

"You know, that's why I want to talk to you. We found him – and now he's lost again. I need your help."

"I not hiding Dan-el. I not see him," the boy explained, becoming defensive. Shaking his head, he backed off a little, his eyes narrowed.

"I know you're not hiding him, kiddo. But Daniel is in that temple on the mountain and I know you showed him that cave. I want you to tell me what you know about those… 'little people'."

Tink-ah stared at him for a second, then turned around to run. But Jack had expected something like that and got hold of the boy's arm.

"I not know. I can't tell. Dan-el promised not to tell you…." 

"Hey! Stop it!" Jack pulled Tink-ah closer and wrapped his free arm around the boy's waist, holding the wriggling child until he finally stilled. "Listen. Daniel was in trouble and I didn't really give him a choice. He had to tell me. And he is your friend, right? We need to find him. So if there's anything we need to know… tell me."

Tink-ah hung his head and relaxed in Jack's grip, so the colonel loosened his hold a little and turned the kid around to face him. He half expected the boy to run again. But Tink-ah just stood there, fighting an inner fight for a moment. "If he in big house he is with the Svartál now. I can't go there," he finally blurted out, lowering his gaze. 

So Pierson had been right. "You don't have to go there. But is there another way inside," Jack demanded.

"Behind waterfall," Tink-ah breathed, still refusing to look at Jack.

"Behind a waterfall? More fairy tales. Great," the colonel sighed. He wondered if he was caught in a Tolkien book or something like that. Svartál, dwarfs, waterfalls, underground worlds… but then again he had seen much more bizarre things since he was working for the SGC. "Do you know how to get there, Tink-ah?"

"No," the boy whispered. 

Jack put a finger under the kid's chin to make him look up. "If you don't tell me, I have to ask your father about it." He knew he was playing dirty, using the child's fear of punishment against him. But he had to find Daniel and he needed to know.

"I not  know."

"Look, Tink-ah. I don't have time for this. I know you are scared, and I think I know why. I won ** ’ ** t tell anybody about your cave secret as long as you agree to help me. You have to trust me. Can you do that?"

"If I show you… you not tell father? It's forbidden. Nobody can go Svartál or read language. Father very angry."

Jack cringed at the thought of the whip he'd been offered. He could only guess what this boy was going through when his father got angry. He took Tink-ah's hand and shook it firmly. "Promise."

"We go now. Way long."

Jack clicked his radio and called Carter. "Get Pierson and meet me…" He gave Tink-ah a questioningly look.

"Temple."

"Meet me at the temple ASAP."

**II**

Daniel looked at the little roots and crumbled fruits Svartil had offered him. He had tasted both and his stomach wasn't happy with the food. But he was starving by now and so he tried it again, making a face at the sour taste. 

He had told Svartil about Earth and the Stargate. 

The little woman knew about the gate and explained that her people had lived on Midgard many thousand years ago, if not millions. Daniel wasn't sure about the time line Svartil used. He had learned that the world-tree, the Yggdrasil, didn't resemble the nine w orlds of Earth – but the universe. Earth had been Midgard once and the Asgard home world was the highest world, at least some of the races that were using the Stargates believed it was.

That had been long before the Goa'uld showed up of course. 

The Svartál had left their home planet Svartálfheim at some point and lived on Midgard, or as many other races called Earth, Tau'ri. They had lived in the mountains and worked there, too; mining for gold and other valuable metals. Then the Goa'uld had arrived and it was war… Svartil told Daniel her people hadn't been allowed to join the alliance against the gods with the glowing eyes.

"Why not?" Daniel asked.

"The Asgard, the Ancient, the Nox and the Furlings were arrogant and believed that we were of no use in their fight," Svartil said with a grimace that made her face appear ugly for a moment.

"Doesn't sound like them," Daniel answered thoughtfully. "The Asgard and the Nox are very ethical races with high morality standards. They are very advanced."

Svartil showed her long pointed teeth and, for the first time since he had met her, Daniel felt a little uneasy. "They might be now. But at the time, they were just looking for power and didn't want to share that power with the Svartál."

Daniel was about to question that, when Svartil smiled her blinding smile again and flashed him a look from her glittering green eyes. It wasn't really important how the Asgard and the Nox had once been, was it? Svartil was nice and she would surely help him to find… 

Daniel tried to remember what he had come to find down here? Why had he come down in the first place? And why was it so important to get back to the surface? He frowned and tried to think about it. There was something he needed to do. 

"I want to show you the Yggdrasil, Daniel," Svartil said with her wonderful jingle voice. She got up and vanished into the back of her little house. When she returned, she held a golden statue in her hands. "This is a statue of great magic and it also destroyed all Svartál that lived with m e down here."

Daniel took it from the dwarf and let his hands wander over it. It was a golden tree, wonderfully sculptured with branches, roots and leaves. A very fragile piece of art, unique in its beauty. It looked completely different from what Daniel had seen depicted in books. He could remember seeing several pictures of the representations of the Yggdrasil as it was known in Earth mythology.

But none of them were comparable to this one. There were shiny colorful little stones in  the branches of the world tree, representing the different worlds. Svartálfheim was hanging in the roots, under the surface, next to the other underground worlds. The roots crept upwards to connect the underworlds with the others. 

The stones reminded Daniel of something... but he couldn't remember of what... something about diving into water and laughing and finding stones similar to these... It was a nice memory and he knew he had been happy not so long ago when he was... He frowned as he tried to make the connection... 

"My ancestor made this for our people. And he bathed it in his blood to bind it with his soul," Svartil told Daniel in a solemn voice.

"It is beautiful," Daniel breathed, caught by the precious work and the elegance in it.

"It is of great power."

"What does it do?"

"It is good for many things. It can bring great fortune and great sorrow. It can mate people and it…"

"It can make the dwarfs grow up," Daniel whispered. He remembered. Pierson… was that his name? Somehow his mind seemed a little fogged. Yes. Pierson had told him about this statue. And that it would make him big again. 

Svartil took the statue from Daniel's shaking hands and placed it on the wooden table between them. "Not anymore. My ancestors once found out how to use the Yggdrasil to let them grow. But only a few of them grew up. Many many of us died in the process. The very few who did grow left the mountain world and wandered to the surface to live there as humans. One night my mother took away the eagle stone. The eagle lived in the top of the tree. His name was Vidofnir. Sitting upon its forehead was a hawk named Vedrfolnir."

"He brings the wind in the skies," Daniel murmured. It was what he remembered from his studies of that part of Earth histories. He hadn't spent too much time on Norse mythology, but he could recall a couple of things.

"He is watching over the Universe. The Asgard, the Furlings, the Nox and the Ancients never believed in his power. But the Svartál do. Vidofnir and Vedrfolnir were represented through a two-colored stone sitting on top of the statue. It was this stone that made my people grow. My mother took it away and hid it on another world at a safe place, so it would do no more harm."

Deep down inside, Daniel knew he should be sad about the fact this special stone was gone. He wanted to grow up again, didn't he? It was, why he'd come here. To find this Yggdrasil statue and bring it back home, so he could be an adult again. But somehow it didn't matter. Everything was so far away. He was locked to Svartil's eyes and her milk white skin. In a trance like voice he asked, "You are saying the people who live on the surface… are related to you?"

"Yes. They lived up under the sky, traveled through the Chapaa'ai and took human mates to give birth to human children," Svartil nodded. “They forgot about their past and they never returned.”

"Why… are you still here?"

"I am the guardian of the Yggdrasil. I was not allowed to grow up or to leave. The Yggdrasil is in my family forever. No guard of Yggdrasil is allowed to use its power for himself. After the grown-ups left us, we buried our dead and tried to live like we lived before. But there were no children born any more. And one after another died. I am the last one. I am tired, young Daniel Jackson. I am looking for peace. But I am not allowed to go. There has to be a guard for the Yggdrasil. It can't be left alone in any world."

Daniel gazed at her beautiful mysterious eyes and forgot what he'd been about to ask next. He wanted to know how her hair felt. It looked like soft gold, shimmering and glittering just like her eyes. When she reached out her hands and touched his face, he wasn't able to pull away. 

He stared into her eyes and saw the deepness in them, like an abyss. Her hands, dry and leathery, wandered over his temples, pressing lightly into his skin. It wasn't unpleasant and it didn't hurt. It was as if something was touching his mind, going through it like an upcoming wind…

"You are special, Daniel Jackson, peaceful explorer," Svartil whispered, when she finally pulled her hands away. "You are not a child and not a man. You are torn between both, not knowing what to be. The Yggdrasil told me you would come. I am here to help you."

Daniel blinked. "Help me?" 

"Yes. I can help you to forget," Svartil sing-song-ed; bells jingling in Daniel's head.

"For… get?" There was something tempting about this word. Forget. He wanted to forget. To get rid of the hurt, the fear of failures. Wanted to forget his wish to be something he wasn't anymore. Oh yes. Forgetting sounded good. 

"Release the memories that haunt you. Taking away the knowledge of being a man. I cannot bring you back to be your adult self without the missing eagle stone. But I can make you a real child. So you will no longer suffer. I can make you happy again, Daniel."

"Oh…" Wasn't that what he wanted? To let go of Doctor Jackson? Being a real kid… if he couldn't grow up, wasn't this the best solution? He felt his heart pounding in his chest. There was something he had to remember… Oh… but remembering was so difficult. All was a mist and he couldn't focus on a clear thought. "I… I could be… a kid?"

A real boy, like Pinocchio became in the end.

"Yes. With all the joy of youth. Never to worry and never to feel so little, while you were used to being older. You would forget about the deaths you have seen and the beloved you have lost."

Beloved… Everyone he had once loved was dead or Goa'uld now… so many losses… his parents… Shau'ri… He felt a tear trickle down his face.

"And you would never have to grow up, Daniel. You would always be little," the sing song voice continued. Daniel could hear the words and the bells and he was drowning in those glittering green eyes. "There is nobody up there who cares, Daniel. They are all only interested in their own luck… you are useless to them now that you are little."

Daniel tried to keep his eyes open. Something was nagging at him…"Jack," he whispered. "Jack loves me."

"Ahhh, Jack. Does he?" Svartil's voice was like a sweet melody, lulling him in, making his limbs heavy and his mind cloudy. All he could do was listen to her. "He wants a son, Daniel. He wants a replacement for his own loss. You are not yourself anymore… not the way you were… he doesn't want you to be big again… he wants you little because he misses Charlie…"

"How do you… know…"

"I saw it in your mind. You have all the answers, you know about Jack… and that you don't belong to him anymore… you can stay here and give your life new sense."

Daniel struggled to stay awake. He needed to tell Svartil she was wrong. That he belonged to Jack and Jack belonged to him… 

But did he really?

Maybe Svartil was right. Maybe Jack really was just looking for another son in his life? Daniel felt insecure. No. Jack loved him, Daniel. Not because Daniel was little now, but because Jack had always loved him before, too. Jack would come for him and Jack would want Daniel to be big again if he could. He tried to focus on these thoughts, but his mind kept slipping away… Was he just a substitute for Charlie now? And if Jack really wanted a son… then Daniel had failed to be the son Jack wanted anyway… he couldn't be good and he couldn't be what Jack expected him to be… and now Jack surely wouldn't want him back anymore because he had wandered off again… and no matter if he was a real child or not… 

Jack would rather have a kid that wasn't difficult and geeky.

There was a smell, sweet and heavy. He saw her holding a plate full of dry leaves under his nose. "Sleep, little Daniel… sleep and let go of all the memories…"

*******

Jack held his weapon like an anchor. The longer they walked through the beautifu l landscape, the more anxious he got. Daniel had been missing for over 27 hours now. O'Neill didn't want to think about the thousands of possibilities for what could have happened to his pint-sized archeologist. Nope. He wouldn't go there.

Daniel had to be okay. He always made it. It was much easier to focus on still being  mad at the kid for lying again and running off…

God. He had to be alive. They had to find him. No way was he going to lose Daniel again.

They had left the village area and passed several crater lakes and wide meadows. Tink-ah had led them through narrow canyons and over high plateaus. He told Jack he'd found the other entrance to the underworld when he had been on a hunt with older children of the tribe. That had been long after he had found the cave. And he was sure this was an entrance to the 'little people's' world, because there had been several pictures of the 'little people' on the walls behind the waterfall.

"How come you went behind the waterfall, Tink-ah?" Carter had asked the boy out of curiosity.

"I wandered off. I do that. Father not happy. Get in trouble often," the kid admitted.

"The very young do not always do what they are told," Jack said with a sad smile.

"How very wise." Pierson, who was walking next to Jack, rolled his eyes.

"A very old friend told me that once. And I mean old as in really old," Jack responded.

"Really? I am impressed. Not." 

"Shut up, Pierson," Jack snarled.

"You are still so charming, O'Neill. It was what I liked most about you."

"I said… ."

"You know each other?" Carter glanced at Pierson.

"We've met," Jack said curtly, not wanting to discuss this matter any further.

Pierson, however, seemed to have a lot more to say. He gave Carter a wide grin and explained. "We've met in Seacover. A friend of mine lived there and I was at his bar. And that's where I met Jack."

"I didn't know that. How come you are working for the SGC now?" Carter asked, making conversation. 

Jack fired a deadly glare in Pierson’s direction. Of course that look, which made most people freeze and cower, didn't work on this rat bastard.

"I work in many places. I was recommended. Not from our colonel here though." Pierson smirked. “But we go way back.”

Carter's eyebrows almost hit her hairline. 

Jack wondered if he could find a good reason to explain why Doctor Adam Pierson died on this mission. Wouldn't be such a great loss, right? There were always sacrifices when it came to off world missions. Poor guy could fall down a ravine. Or be shot accidentally.

Carter opened her mouth, then snapped it shut. giving Pierson a cold look.

O'Neill suppressed a sigh. There was no use in  explaining to her that Pierson had vanished without a trace after they'd spent two days and nights together. Pierson had, sort of, helped Jack coming to terms with some personal crap from his past. Jack had no idea if Pierson was aware of that, and he sure as hell wasn't going to ask. They didn't have that kind of relationship. It had been a quick get-together, nothing more. 

"There waterfall," Tink-ah interrupted them. They stopped walking and followed his outstretched finger. It was impressive. Roaring and bubbling, masses of water were running down a sheer rock face. "I show way," the kid said.

Jack turned around to Michaels and his search party. "We follow the kid."

Thirty minutes later they were climbing over slippery wet rocks. Cold sprays of water had them all damp in no time. When they finally reached a narrow gap between the rock face, Jack ordered Michaels to post two of his men in front of it. 

Pierson studied the old pictures in the fissured rock, or what was left of them. The water had destroyed most of what once had been a large drawing. In an attempt to override the roar of the waterfall the Doctor yelled. "This is interesting! The boy was right! It is another entrance to the world of the Svartál! I might be able to talk to them, if there is anyone left!"

Jack wanted Pierson to go to hell. But he had to admit the guy was right. So he just nodded and waved at him and Carter to follow him through the gap. When he felt a tug at his sleeve and looked down, Tink-ah stared up at him, determination written all over his face. "I come too. Dan-el friend."

"No you're not. You go back home. It's too dangerous. We'll find Daniel. I promise," Jack said loud and firmly. Another kid to look after was the last thing he needed right now.

"I strong. I fight!"

Jack placed his hands on Tink-ah's shoulders. "I have a mission for you, big guy. You go back to the temple with one of Colonel Michaels' men and tell the guards we found a way in there. And that somebody has to report this to our home world. Can you do that?"

"Yes."

"Okay. Now scoot.” Jack watched him leave and wished Daniel would be this easy to impress. When he turned back to the others, he caught Pierson's eyes on him. "What?"

"You're good with kids."

Jack shrugged it off. "Let's go."

There was a tight passage down the gap. They retrieved their flashlights and wandered in silence. It was slippery and they had to watch their step. The noise of the water was still loud, but bearable now. 

"I see light," Pierson said, almost able to speak at a normal volume again. They were deep down inside the mountain now. Jack could see the faint light in front of him, too. He gripped his P90 more tightly.

Ten minutes later they stepped out of the passage and gazed at the scenery in front of them. 

It was a valley. A valley inside a mountain. And the light was like sunlight, coming from somewhere above them. Jack tipped his head back and looked at the ceiling. He couldn't see where the source was. There was no sky. Only rocks, trees, water and grass. It looked almost like on the surface. But everything seemed to be smaller.

And deserted.

"There are no animals here. I can't hear birds or insects," Carter said, her voice sounding a bit hollow. 

"I can't see people either," one of Michaels's men reported.

"That might be because they're hiding, Lieutenant," Jack said, letting his eyes wander over the landscape.

"Yes, sir."

Jack couldn't help but exchange a look with Pierson and they rolled their eyes in union for a change. Carter maintained a straight face.

"All right. We don't split up yet. Let's take the yellow brick road there. Michaels, you and your men watch our six. Carter, Pierson with me."

"Yes, sir."

"Shut up, Pierson."

"I'm just saying."

Jack was about to say something sarcastic when he realized, how much this little bantering reminded him of Daniel and himself. He bit his tongue and walked on. After a while, Pierson fell into step beside him. Carter stayed behind and Jack had the suspicion the good Doctor had asked her to give them some privacy. He didn't want to have any privacy with Pierson, thank you very much.

 

 

"I'm sorry I lost your kid."

"You're going to be a lot more sorry if we don't find him alive and well," Jack said through clenched teeth.

"We will find him. He is a smart guy."

"Yeah. Way too smart for his age," Jack snorted.

“There's something you should know.” Pierson winced. “The kid didn't tell me he had permission to go into the temple. He said right out you forbid it and I told him... well, let's just say I was convinced he'd find a way to grow up again down here.“

The only reason Jack's fist didn't collide with Pierson's face right that minute was the fact that... “What do you mean; grow up again?” 

“Grow up. Get back his old life. Become Doctor Jackson again. That sort of thing.“

_What the fuck?_ “That's classified. You're not supposed to know.“

“Maybe Hammond cleared me?” Pierson didn't even try to sound like he meant it.

“Son of a bitch,” Jack snarled. “You knew he'd do anything to get big again, don't you?“

“I really thought he would.” 

“Think again, Pierson. Because all I see down here are ruins and a whole lot of nothing even remotely close to a grow-up-quick device!” But at least Daniel hadn't lied. Somehow knowing that made Jack feel a little better because he didn't have to deal with more trust issues than he already had.

He remembered what Kink-ah had said about the legend of growing dwarfs... it made a hell of a lot more sense if Daniel went down here to find a solution for his troubles. 

"He is special. I thought sending him down here was the right thing to do. And I couldn't afford a long interrogation by you or Hammond about the reasons why I sent him down. That's why I said he lied. We had to act fast.“

“I'm going to rip you a new one, once this is over," Jack promised darkly.

Pierson didn't seem to be too upset by that. “Look. I really don't know why on Earth you are the one who was chosen to take care of him. But the powers that be must have their reasons."

Jack frowned at the man next to him. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about Daniel Jackson. Once big, now little. "

"I'm going to find out who told you. And then heads are gonna roll."

"Of course. In the meantime listen to me, O'Neill. It's your job to keep him safe and you better not screw this one up. Both of you need to make choices in the future. I only hope you'll choose right."

Jack stopped abruptly and whipped around to grab Pierson by his jacket. But the other man was faster. His hands snapped around O'Neill's wrists. "Just listen to me, Jack. However this turns out; things are not as they seem to be. I didn't know there was another entrance to this place. I didn't plan to lose Daniel. I am not your enemy and I'm not after Daniel."

"What's this all about, Pierson? Don't talk in riddles. Give me answers."

"I can't. All I can tell you is that Daniel has a path to walk. And you are his guardian. He is chosen. You are both… as I said, I don't get why you. But somehow it happens to be this way."

"I want to know how you fit in here," Jack demanded.

"Actually, I don't. I was just interested in something and crossed your path."

"Pierson...“

But the Doctor let go of Jack's wrists and started walking again.

**III**

When Daniel came back to consciousness it was as if he returned from some place very deep. His head felt heavy and his nostrils were flooded with the heavy sweet smell of herbal leaves. 

He knew this smell. 

“ _Smells like the biggest joint I ever had"…. "You’ve had joints, sir?"…. "What is a joint, O'Neill?"…_

Daniel blinked. The voices in this memory were familiar, but what they said made no sense to him. It was so hard to keep his eyes open. Everything was spinning. He was lying on the hard ground. He felt cold and when he looked down at himself, he was dressed in a white shiny robe. 

How had he gotten here? Where were his parents? And what was this yucky smell?

"You are awake. That is good, Daniel," a wonderful jingle-bells-voice spoke to him. 

When Daniel looked up he saw an angel. An angel with long golden hair and glittering green eyes. She was dressed in a robe, too, and she held a statue in her hands. It looked like an odd golden tree of some sort.

"Am I… dead?" Daniel asked, not sure if he should be scared or curious. The angel was beautiful. He decided he liked the angel. 

Now the angel was laughing, a light bubbling sound, and shaking her head. "No, Daniel. You are not dead. You are the new guardian of the Yggdrasil. You will learn everything from me that I know. And then you will watch over the world tree so nobody can come and take it away from here. Because it can be very dangerous if it falls in the hand of the wrong people."

"I am a guard? Where are my parents? Wasn't I in New York just…" He stopped talking, when he heard a voice from far away calling his name.

The angel had heard it, too. All of a sudden, her laughter died away and the color of her eyes changed from green to black. Daniel shuffled backwards on his bottom to get away from her. She let out a hiss and whirled around as the voice called again.

"Who is that?" Daniel knew that voice. That voice meant something to him… but it wasn't his daddy. He couldn't remember… There was something, he had forgotten. Something important. It was there, just out of reach. 

When the angel creature looked back at him, her face was soft again, her eyes green and sparkling. She had wonderful eyes. They calmed him. And her voice was soothing, too. "It is no one, Daniel. Let me take care of them. You must rest."

Daniel squeezed his eyes shut and opened them wide again. Why was he feeling so odd? And why wasn’t he in New York? He had been there. He remembered how excited he'd been when they arrived two days ago. What a big city! His parents wanted to take him to the museum today. Where they would build their own Egypt exhibition. Now he was in a dusty little house, wearing strange robes and none of this made any sense to him.

"I'm not tired anymore. They're calling for me. Shouldn't we let them know I'm here? Maybe my parents are with them," he told the angel and got to his feet. The sweet smell made him dizzy again, but he tried to fight it this time.

The angel's eyes started to change once more, or maybe Daniel just thought they did. When he blinked, they were still green and sparkling. "No, Daniel. We better not tell them where you are. They are bad people. They want to take you away from here. And we don't want that. Those people are very mean and greedy. They want to steal the Yggdrasil from us."

"Really?"

"Yes. And they want to hurt you," the angel sa id in a sing song voice that made the bells jingle louder in Daniel's head and ears. Maybe the angel was right. He didn't want to get hurt. And this Yggdrasil looked like a very important artifact **. ** If those people w ere thieves, he better stayed where he was.

"The ritual is not complete. I have to send those bad people away, so we can get you ready to take over the duty as the guardian," the angel said. 

Scartil… Sarti…Svartil… Yes. "Svartil," Daniel murmured. "Your name is Svartil."

But the angel had left the room.

*******

"Daniel!" Jack shook his head. There was nobody here. 

They had been hiking over an hour without seeing a soul. Only rotten loam houses and shrubs, lakes and trees. And over all the stillness of a dead world. He had called out for Daniel several times now. Nothing. 

Carter and Pierson called for him, too, while Michaels and his two guys were combing through the high grass and searching the deserted houses. 

When the creature was suddenly standing on the path in front of him, Jack almost shot it accidentally. But his trigger finger was well trained and so he just let out a startled, “Whoa!” 

"What is it you wish?"

His hand crept to his radio. "Carter, Pierson… over here."

The creature with the golden fuzzy hair was about Daniel's height and looked like a burly little woman. But Jack didn't let himself fool by looks. His hand still at his weapon, he asked, "Who are you?"

"I am Svartil. Guardian of the Yggdrasil. You are not welcome here. Go." Her eyes were almost black and when she spoke, Jack saw a row of pointed teeth in her mouth.

"I'm looking for a kid. Little boy, about seven. You seen him?" 

"I haven't seen such a child. This is not your land. Leave."

"I don't think so. First I need to find my kid."

Carter was now next to him, her weapon pointing at the dwarf woman. 

Smartie wasn't  impressed. She showed her teeth again. "Leave!"

"Look. All I want to do is look around for the boy. As soon as I have him, I leave you to… whatever you're doing here," O'Neill said, his eyes searching the area behind the creature. There was a little house, looking a tad better than the other buildings around. He guessed it was the home of the little creep.

"The boy is not here."

_******* _

Part of the dizziness fell from him as soon as Svartil had left the house. 

Daniel walked around the table on unsteady feet and peered out the window. Svartil was in the middle of the path. And there were two men and a woman with her. 

Daniel rubbed his eyes. He didn't know those adults. Yet, they looked familiar. They were wearing green pants and jackets and heavy boots. One of the men had a cap on his head and they all carried weapons. But somehow he knew he didn't have to be scared of the weapons, or the people. The man with the green cap… Daniel heard him say, "Yeah, right… Then why don't you let us take a look around?"

"It is not permitted for humans to come into this world," Svartil said. Her voice had changed. There weren't bells in it anymore. It sounded cold and dangerous now.

"You know, we're already here. So where is he?"

"You are very persistent, Midgard man."

"Yep. That would be me." Then the man started yelling again. "Daniel?! Are you in there? Don't come out! Just let me know!"

But he couldn't stop himself from running out the door. It was like his feet had a life of their own. The woman saw him and yelled at her partner. "Colonel! He's here!"

The colonel barked, "Daniel! Stay back!"

Svartil whirled around to look at him. Throwing up her arms and spreading them wide over her head she let out a high pitched scream. Daniel saw the colonel aim his weapon at Svartil. 

And he was running, stumbling, yelling. "Don't shoot! Don't shoot! Don't shoot!"

But it was too late. Daniel heard gunfire explode around him. The next thing he felt were two hands grabbing him. He was scooped up and automatically clamped his arms and legs around the man called Colonel. He buried his face into the man's shoulder while they were running. 

There was more gunfire as he heard the woman yell at them to move faster.

Over all of it he heard Svartil's horrible screams, in a strange language he had never heard before. Lightning jolted around them and suddenly he could hear the colonel scream, too. Daniel held onto him as they went down into the dust together. 

There was a blinding white light surrounding them. Daniel jerked his eyes open and stared over the Colonel's shoulder. Everything was white and shiny around him. He could hear the woman yell something.

Then everything went black.

The next thing Daniel felt was coldness seeping through the robes he was wearing. 

He was dizzy again. He opened his eyes, but it was pitch black around him. When he tried sitting up, he yelped. His head throbbed and so was his hand. He tried to remember what had happened. There had been people with weapons looking for him. And Svartil had screamed and there had been gunfire and a white light… 

A soft moan to his left made him freeze. There it was again, louder this time.

Then a voice. "Ow… Daniel?"

It was the colonel.

"I'm here," Daniel said.

"Where?" 

"I don't know. It's dark." Daniel searched the ground with his hands. He crawled a few feet to his left and finally his fingers touched an arm or leg. "Here," he whispered.

There was a hand feeling its way up Daniel's arm and then his hair was being ruffled.

"You okay?" The colonel's voice sounded funny. As though he couldn't breathe properly.

"My head hurts. And my hand," Daniel said, a lump forming in his throat.

"Okay… okay…" The hand was gone and Daniel wanted it back. In panic he tried to grab it, but his fingers poked into something soft and slippery and the colonel let out a groan. Daniel pulled his fingers away quickly, feeling something sticky and warm at them. "Sorry… did I hurt you, Colonel?"

"What? My shoulder… it's nothing."

"It's bleeding," Daniel said, realizing what the sticky stuff on his fingers was.

"Yeah. I'll live. We should be able to see something again soon. We were blinded by that light," the voice explained, sounding a little stronger now.

"What was it?"

"Don't know. The little witch was screaming like a banshee and the light came out of her hands or something. Some weird alien stuff…. I think I can see something now… what about you?"

Daniel blinked and found the blackness slowly turn into gray "Yes. A little bit."

After a moment he could see the outlines of rocks. "It's still dark. Is it a cave?" He was scared. He didn't understand any of this. He wanted to be home. He didn't want to cry, but he couldn't stop himself. He felt the colonel's arm sneak around his back, pulling him in and against his good shoulder. "I want my daddy," Daniel sobbed. "I want to know where they are."

The colonel sounded funny when he asked, "Daniel? Your daddy?"

"Yes. Where is he? And my mom? I… I didn't wander off this time… Oh, I mean, I can't remember, but I didn't mean to get lost."

The colonel rubbed his back, but didn't say anything. Daniel tried to stop crying, but all he managed was a hiccup. Finally, the man who was holding him, asked, "Daniel… how old are you?"

"Se…seven," he sobbed.

Somehow this dialogue triggered something in him. The colonel had asked him this before… he had been angry because Daniel had wandered off… and had done something else… 

"I'm sorry," he whispered. Maybe he was here because of what he had done? What he couldn't remember? Maybe the military had arrested him for some reason? 

"Okay… shhh… it's okay. Calm down." The colonel didn't sound angry. His voice was kind and soothing. 

"Don't be mad at me… I can't remember."

"It's okay, Danny. I'm here. I'm not mad."

*******

Jack tried to sit up properly and lean against the wall behind him, while he was holding the sobbing child with his good arm. He was whispering nonsense into the boy's ear until he finally relaxed a little.

Jack's left shoulder bitched and his right knee screamed murder at him. Jack tried to get things together in his head. That creature had shot lightning at them… and then must have activated a transportation device … they were in some kind of cave. 

Carter and Pierson… he had no idea. Same with Michaels and his men. 

And Daniel… Daniel wanted his daddy and mommy… and that could only mean he had lost his memories to some degree.

"Crap," he hissed.

"You… can't say crap… tha'sss…a b… bad word," the kid told him, teary voice.

"Says who?"

"My m- mom."

"Your mom is right, buddy. But sometimes things are really really bad. And if nobody hears you, you can say it so you feel better," Jack heard himself explain.

"I heard you."

"Yes, but you are in the same crap… situation, so you are allowed to say it, too."

"Really?"

"Yep. Just once though." Most kids liked potty jokes, so hopefully this altered version of Daniel did, too. 

"Crap." There was a weak giggle. "I could say that in many languages."

"Really? Well… You already said it once. But maybe you can come up with something else? You're good with languages, aren't you?"

"Yeah. I guess. Não seja um burro, Jack… oh…sorry…"

Jack felt a flicker of hope. He nudged Daniel's head with his chin. "What's that mean?"

Instead of an answer, the kid buried his head deeper in Jack's jacket. "I don't know why I said that."

"It's okay. You've said that before and never told me what it means."

"I did? Is your name Jack?"

"Yeah."

"Don't be an ass… that's what it means. And I'm not supposed to say that either."

Jack couldn't help but chuckle at this. "I won't tell anyond. Don't you remember when you said that to me?"

There was a long silence. Then, "No. Should I? If I did, I'm sorry, sir."

"It's okay."

If Daniel had now lost his adult mind, his memories… all he had been, all he had known…

Jack tried not to think about the consequences. He had to focus on the task at hand right now. He found his radio still attached to his jacket and tried to contact Carter or Michaels, but got nothing, only static. So this was a bad plan. They needed a plan B. There was always a plan B. 

"Can you help me up? I need to take a look around," he groaned.

"I can take a look around for you. I can see again. We're in a cave. Do you want me to find an exit?" Daniel scrambled to his feet. Jack could see him vaguely in the dark chamber.

"Yes. But don't go too far. Wait… there's a flashlight i n my vest." Jack tried to reach his flashlight without moving his shoulder too much. When he had managed to grab it, he clicked it on. 

He heard Daniel sigh with relief. They looked at each other.

"Hey," Jack said and smiled.

"Hey." Daniel smiled back. "Can I have the light?"

Jack handed it over to Daniel who started walking around. Jack followed the beam with his eyes. All he could make out was a wall of rock.

"Who was that witch," he mumbled. 

He didn't expect an answer, and was surprised when Daniel replied, "Her name is Svartil. She is the guard of the Yggdrasil, the tree of worlds. She wants to make me the new guard. And she said I can stay little… and that I have to let go of my memories. I don't know what that means, though. But she looked like an angel. And then she looked like a demon."

"She took away your memories," Jack murmured, putting two and two together. But he was still getting five out of it. Why did this creature try to make Daniel the new guard of … whatever this world tree was called.

“Svartil is old and tired. She wants to sleep. But she can't go until somebody is guarding the Yggdrasil for her,” Daniel said, sounding sad. "I know who I am. I don't know who you are, though. But I think I should know."

"I'm Jack. We're friends."

Daniel came over to him. Jack squeezed his eyes shut when the boy shone the light into his face. "You're old. Are you a friend of my dad?"

"No, Daniel. I'm a friend of yours. And I am not THAT old. That Smartie…"

"You know her name is Svartil. You just don't like her. That's why you call her Smartie," Daniel said sternly.

"I'm bad at names." Jack shrugged.

"No, you're not. You just pretend you are."

"And you know that – how?"

"I just know."

Jack snorted. Even with his memory gone Daniel was cheeky. Not that he wasn't right. "Can you help me to get my vest and jacket off?" he asked the boy.

Daniel nodded and together they managed to get Jack out of his vest first. When they worked on the jacket, he had to bite his tongue not to yell in pain as the ripped fabric was pulled away from his bleeding shoulder. Cold sweat was running down his face. But he didn't want to scare Daniel and managed to keep quiet, except for a low groan.

"Do you hurt badly?" Daniel asked worried.

"I… It's okay… can you hold the light? You don't have to look at it. Just… point the light here…" Daniel did as he was told without uttering a word. Jack looked at the wound. It was still bleeding, but he couldn't make out how deep it was. It was too dark in here. "Okay… you think you can help me here, Danny?"

"What can I do?" The kid's voice was very small.

"My shirt. We need to make a bandage from my shirt," Jack said. 

Once they'd gone through the even more painful procedure of taking off the shirt, Jack told Daniel how to tear the fabric apart and fold a bandage out of it. 

Then he talked Danny through dressing his shoulder. It took a while, but the boy listened carefully and managed to get it right. Exhausted and dizzy, Jack leaned his head back against the wall. Daniel pulled the jacket around Jack's upper body. He slipped into it with his right arm to keep himself warm.

"Thanks, kiddo," he sighed. After a while he gestured his right hand at Daniel. "Help me up."

Daniel stood still while Jack leaned on him, using the wall as a second support, and came to his feet. He put his good arm around Daniel's shoulder and hobbled a few steps to test the stability of his leg. "Ow… o-kay. I can walk. Somehow."

"Um… Jim?"

"Jack."

"Yes. Jack… we can't go anywhere."

"I want to check the walls." Jack reached for his gun which was leaning against the rock face. Daniel carefully helped him across the room to the opposite wall.

"I checked the walls for you."

"Let me… let me try something." Jack let go of Daniel's shoulder and started to poke at the walls with the barrel of the P90 to find a crack or a gap. "Shine the light here, Daniel."

But it was of no use. They were caught in a room without exits. There was no ring transporter in here either, as Jack found out quickly. With a sigh, he slid down the wall again and carefully stretched his injured leg.

"I'm hungry," a small voice came from beside him.

Jack was about to tell Daniel he had nothing to eat, when he remembered he'd brought a couple of power bars with him. He pulled them out of his jacket and handed one over to the kid. "It's no chocolate, but it's something."

"Thank you,” Daniel said politely. When he had taken a careful bite, he smacked his lips. “Y ummy.” 

"You're welcome. But eat slowly. I only have one more."

For a while all he could hear was Daniel munching the power bar. Jack felt his own stomach grumble, but ignored it. He was tired due to the loss of blood and felt himself doze off, and bent his right leg a little. The pain jolting through it made him grit his teeth in agony. Yep, always worked to keep him awake.

"I could read real fast once," Daniel said suddenly, puzzled.

"What?"

"I… could read a real big book in one minute. And you, too… and you were eating these power things all the time."

Jack turned to look at Daniel. "Yes. So you're remembering, huh?"

"I… I can… Jack?"

"Yes?"

"Do I want to remember this? Because something tells me I'd rather not. All of this is odd. Shouldn't I be in New York now, with my mom and dad, in the museum? I remember Svartil telling me I have to forget things."

"I don't know, Daniel. Your memories are part of you. They make you what you are. Even the painful ones. But let's find a way out of here and then we can work on your memory, okay?"

"What if I don't like what I am? What if I don't want to be that person anymore? I get the feeling I forgot a whole lot…"

Jack didn't know how to respond to that. Maybe this was it. If Daniel believed he was really seven… he could grow up again normally. Provided they'd escape from here and Daniel had a chance to grow up. But he felt Daniel staring at him, expecting an answer. 

"You're one of the toughest guys I've ever known, Daniel. There is nothing not to like about you. Don't worry. We'll get out of here and work it out."

"'Kay," Daniel murmured.

Jack closed his eyes and tried to think of something, but the pain made him dizzy and he knew he was losing more blood. The bandage on his shoulder was already soaked. His eyes dropped close... that was all right... he'd just rest for a moment... he wouldn't fall asleep... couldn't... 

When he heard a low “click” next to him, his eyes popped open and he picked up the flashlight. Daniel was sitting next to him, holding the gun in both hands, turning it over and over.

Jack felt the blood freeze in his veins. "Daniel, put that down," he heard himself say in a surprisingly calm voice.

"Why? I remember something… you are shooting at things."

Jack licked his dry lips. He knew the gun was secured. But if Daniel started to pull at it and accidentally touched the mechanism… "Put it down, Daniel. Now."

"I don't like it, when you want to shoot…"

Jack reached out and placed his hand on the barrel. H e needed all his willpower to act calm. Daniel knew how to use a gun. Even after he'd become a kid, he had that knowledge and he even did training sessions at the SGC with the zat. So that he could defend himself if necessary. He couldn't fire hand weapons anymore though because of the recoils.

But this Daniel had lost his memories and Jack had no idea if he remembered how to handle the P90 now. All he could see was a little kid with his gun in his hands. 

Again.

"No, Daniel, you don't like me wanting to shoot people. And I don't like it when you're playing with my gun. It's not a toy. It's dangerous. Now let it go."

"But…"

"Daniel! Can you for once just do what I tell you to? Let go!"

Daniel let go of the P90 and Jack placed it on his other side, away from curious little hands. Then he turned around and, grabbing Daniel by his robe with his good hand, shook him roughly. 

*******

Daniel yelped as Jack snapped at him. "Damn it, Daniel! If you ever do that again…"

He blinked, fighting back tears. Why was the colonel so angry? He hadn't done anything wrong. He didn't want to shoot or anything. And he knew the gun was secured. Looking at it had triggered another memory and he only wanted to find out what it was. 

"I was just looking at it," Daniel tried to explain, confused why he should know anything about guns. He was a kid. Kids didn't use guns, right? Why was he almost certain he had fired weapons before?

"As long as you don't remember how to handle a gun, you're not touching it," Jack barked. 

So he had known how to use a gun? A sudden flare of anger made him jerk away from Jack. The words came out of his mouth before he realized what he was saying. "Why can't you finally accept that I'm NOT a baby! I know how to handle a gun!"

Jack cocked his head and stared at him quizzically. "Daniel?"

He opened his mouth, but no sound came out of it. Something was so very wrong here… his head hurt so bad and Jack had yelled at him… because Jack didn't want him to play with his gun and kill himself like Charlie had done… but Daniel was not… was not…

"I'm not Charlie," he choked out. "And no matter how much you want it, I am never going to BE Charlie for you." Daniel was not entirely sure what he was talking about. It felt just right to let Jack know this.

"I don't want you to be Charlie," the colonel answered him in a tight voice. “We've been through this before.“

"Svartil said you don't want me to get big again because you want me to be your new Charlie."

"That's not true.”

But Daniel wasn't listening to Jack anymore. 

The realization hit him like a ton of bricks. 

With a yelp of sorrow, he surged to his feet and ran the few steps to the other side of the chamber. He squatted down in a corner and wrapped his arms around his pulled up knees. 

His parents… were dead… and he had been grown up… he should be a man, not a child. He had been seven a very long time ago… the mist was fading and faces were rising to the surface… friends… enemies… all in a whirl of thoughts… Kathryn Langford… the stargate… Shau’ri… Abydos… Ra… Jack… Aphophis… Teal'c… Shau’ri was taken… Skaara….

"Nonononono…," Daniel whimpered, pressing his hands to his eyes.

**IV**

Jack tried to get up. 

Daniel was sitting at the other end of the cave, whimpering one single word over and over again. "Nonono!"

"Danny…" He tried to get on one knee, ignoring his shoulder as he used both hands to pull himself up. When he finally stood, he managed to do a few steps, using his right hand to support his body on the wall. A few steps later his knee gave out under him and Jack had to sit down again. 

He couldn't reach the kid, and the whimpering had turned into a long howl of agony now. "Noooo… I don't want to remember… nooo… Take it away… They are all dead… pleasepleaseplease…“

Jack had no idea what Daniel was going through. All he could assume was that his memories had come back. And that it was too much for the kid to take it all at once.

"Daniel! Daniel, listen to me! Calm down! You have to calm down," Jack tried to break through to him. 

"All gone… Taken… Snakes… Shau’ri … so many glowing eyes… Hathor… Please, make it go away… too many… please…"

"Focus on my voice! Remember… remember how it was… the good things! You have to remember the good things, Daniel," Jack told him, trying to keep his voice steady and calm, yet loud enough to reach the boy.

"I died… Klorel's ship… I came back… there was a sarcophagus… cold… was so…" Daniel rocked back and forth.

Jack cursed silently. He needed to reach him, to snap him out of it. Daniel would go insane if this didn't stop soon. "Yes," he tried again. "You died and you came back. You came back to us, Danny. You have to come back to me now… don't let it overtake you!"

"I came back," Daniel mumbled, "and… you were there… Sam, and Teal'c… and youwerethereandyoucalledme…"

"Space monkey," Jack said desperately, clinging to that nick name. "Yes. Space monkey. That's good… you're my space monkey."

"And I knew I loved you,” Daniel whispered brokenly. Then his head lolled back on his neck and he lost consciousness.

Jack continued to call his name, but it was no use. 

He. Had. To. Reach. Him. 

He managed to get on his left knee. Using his right arm and left leg, he crawled over to the boy now lying like a rag doll by the foot of the wall. Finally, with an exhausted groan, Jack sh ifted himself into a position where he could reach out for Daniel and cradle him to his chest, using his good arm to hold him close. 

Jack didn't know if Daniel knew he was being held. But suddenly he began to move restlessly and his eyes fluttered open again. "Machello, inventions to fight the Goa'uld. Remember... I'm sorry…. I'm such a head case. Jack… don't go'way… don't leave me… It was in my closet… I saw it,” he murmured.

Jack pressed his face into Daniel's sweaty hair. "I'm not leaving. I'm here."

"You left… me… it was all white… they gave me drugs… and you… left."

O'Neill closed his eyes, an old and long forgotten guilt raising its ugly head. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Danny. But I won't leave now. I'm never gonna leave you again. I love you, buddy. You listen to me?… Love you, space monkey."

Daniel went quiet, his breath shaky and wheezy. Jack whispered incoherent things to his little boy, stroking his head and back. Slowly Daniel calmed down and fell into a deep sleep.

 

 

*******

Daniel came back from his sleep with a dull ache in his head. He was huddled so tightly against Jack, he got a mouthful of his jacket when he yawned. He wriggled a little to get more air. But Jack's arm clamped around him and pulled him closer again.

"Mmmphg… J'ck!"

"Okay, okay, I'm here… won't go anywhere,” Jack mumbled.

Daniel pushed and wriggled, and finally managed to pull his head free. "Jack!"

The face of his friend was only an outline in the darkness of the cave.

Daniel blinked in confusion. Cave? Had he not just walked on a path around a lake in that underground world? Why was he in a cave now? And when did Jack find him?

"Danny?" Jack croaked. 

"Yes. Are you okay?"

There was a snort of laughter. "Am I…? I don't know. You?"

"Um… head hurts and my hand. I dreamed a lot of scary things," Daniel said slowly.

Jack coughed and shifted his body in a more comfortable position. Daniel heard him search for something. A few moments later the flashlight was clicked on and Daniel could see Jack's face. He was deeply worried by the exhaustion and deep circles under his friend’s eyes. It had to be the play of light and darkness that made Jack appear this old and tired.

"What's the last thing you remember?" Jack asked quietly.

“Remember? Oh, I was walking in a valley inside a cave and I met this… dwarf woman. I was…" Daniel stopped when something caught his eyes. Reaching out for Jack's shoulder, he yelped. "Jack… Jack, you're bleeding."

"It's just a scratch. You were saying?"

"It's not a scratch! It's a bloody mess. Do you have anything to use as a new bandage? This one is full of blood."

"Dunno… shirt's all ruined," Jack muttered.

"I’ll take mine off. It's smaller, but it'll work." Daniel started to take his jacket off, but Jack put a hand on his arm to stop him.

"No. It's cold."

"But you're bleeding and you're shivering. You need warmth and a new bandage," Daniel insisted.

"I need to get outta here. And fast. You sure, you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine. How did we get here?" Daniel took off his jacket and shirt. 

As Daniel started to pull the soaked shirt from the wound Jack moaned deep in his throat and squeezed his eyes shut. Daniel tried not to look too closely at the wound. He ripped his shirt apart and put it around the shoulder. When he was finished he pulled Jack's jacket back over it. Once Daniel had put his own jacket back on, he crawled under Jacks good arm and snuggled in to share body warmth.

They just sat there for a moment. Finally Daniel asked, "Why are we here? How did you find me?"

"Later… need to think."

"Jack?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you mad at me?"

"Daniel?"

"Yes?"

"Can we do the talking later?"

"Okay."

"Good. Need to try the radio again."

“I'll try. You save your strength.” Daniel found the radio attached to Jack's jacket. He tried to reach someone, but there was only static. He was about to ask Jack what they should do now, when there was a low humming and a white light engulfing them.

  
  


The first thing Daniel was aware off when he opened his eyes, was the light. He blinked and blinked again. Once it stopped hurting his eyes he looked around and saw the lake and the trees of Svartil's valley. Jack was lying next to him, unconscious. Daniel winced when he saw the blood soaked jacket and how pale his friend was. He sat up, holding his throbbing head with both hands, only to wince at the pain in his left hand, as he pressed it to his temple.

When he felt a touch to his shoulder, Daniel jerked away and let out a startled yelp.

"Shhh… it's me, Daniel."

"Doctor Pierson?" 

The slender man crouched and looked him over. "Are you well enough to walk?"

"Yes. But Jack… Jack's…" Daniel felt very weak suddenly. He crawled over to his friend and closed his fingers around Jack's right hand. 

“I’ll take care of him," Pierson said and got to his feet. He manhandled Jack over his shoulders. Daniel grabbed Pierson’s backpack and without another word they started walking.

So many questions whirled around in Daniel's head, but he needed all his strength to walk and not fall behind. His short legs and exhausted body were about to give up. But he gritted his teeth and fought it as best as he could. Jack was injured and now was not the time to act "little." His body had to obey him, no matter what. He could rest and sleep later.

But he couldn't keep quiet for long. "Where is Svartil. And Sam? Teal'c? Weren't they going to meet that Kytano guy? Of course, they probably had to cancel that mission because of me. Oh, man, I'm so gonna get it. I can't believe I listened to you and..."

"Not now, Daniel,” Pierson interrupted him. “Let's find a safe place where we can rest a minute. I know you are exhausted. But we can't stay here. Move, boy." 

"But what if…"

"Later."

Once they had reached one of the deserted houses, Pierson walked in and carefully put Jack on the dirty ground. He felt O'Neill's pulse, nodded and then pulled several items out of his backpack. Daniel watched Pierson work on Jack's shoulder, changing his makeshift bandage for a real one. Jack moved and groaned a lot, but didn't regain consciousness. 

"His knee is injured, too," Daniel remembered. 

Pierson probed Jack's leg and found the problem. "I can't do anything for his leg here. Feels like a meniscus rupture. Can't rip the pants off. The knee is too swollen."

"Do you have a medical degree?"

"I know a few things about medicine from my… historical studies. He’s lost a lot of blood."

"I tried to bandage him." 

"Yes. You did good work there. We can't stay here long though. That little demon could be back anytime." Pierson sifted through his pack again and handed Daniel a box with cookies. 

"There is nothing like having a few snacks in the pack," Pierson smiled as he watched Daniel eat hungrily. “But hurry up. We need to get going soon.” 

Pierson clicked his radio and called Michaels. "I found Colonel O'Neill and Daniel. The colonel is injured and needs medical attention quickly. Daniel is all right. We are in one of the houses," he reported hastily. 

"Major Carter has reached the gate and reported to base. They'll bring backup and Doctor Fraiser through with a medical team."

"Good. I'm near the lake where we found Svartil. I don't know where she is."

"We are on our way. Michaels out."

Daniel felt relief wash over him. They had radio contact and Sam would bring Janet. Jack was going to be all right. Then he couldn't hold back all the questions anymore.

"What happened? I can remember shooting and Svartil flashing lightning at us… and then we were trapped in that cave,” Daniel said between gobbling down two more cookies.

Pierson walked to the window and looked outside. " She had a weapon hidden in her robes. And a transportation device. Michaels and Carter fired at her. You and Jack disappeared and then Svartil was gone, too. We were searching for you and finally Michaels sent Carter back to the gate to get backup. I found Svartil and was able to wrestle the transporter remote from her. But the bitch came after me and it took me some time to get away. And then it took me awhile to figure out how to use the device. There wasn’t any writing on it. And it doesn't have a switch. "

"Where is she now? Did you find the statue? I saw it. But it won't make me big again. There's a piece missing or something. I can't remember what exactly. Svartil said, I had to forget and…"

"Daniel, do you always talk that much and that fast?" But there was a smile on the doctor's face when he turned to look at him. 

He shrugged. "Jack says I'm a chatterbox. And a pain in the neck."

"Really? Well, I don't know about the pain in the neck. But chatterbox sounds right."

Daniel made a face. "Jack is always calling me names. He's done that before. Space monkey, grasshopper… I'm used to it. Since I'm little, he calls me Wretch a lot."

"I see. And are you? A Wretch?"

Daniel was playing with the cookie in his hand, grimacing at the amused expression on Pierson's face. "I guess so. And the pain in his neck, too. I'm not a cute kid. Or a nice kid, you know."

"I thought you weren't a kid at all," Pierson said, raising an eyebrow.

"I don't know what I am." He rubbed his temple. "Svartil offered to help me forget about my adult life. Wanted me to let go and be a little kid. She said something about staying here and being the new guard of the Yggdrasil. And in return she would help me to get rid of my memories. And it sounded really wonderful at the time."

"I don't think it is."

"Why not? I mean, I wouldn't want to stay here or anything. But do you know what I've lost?" Daniel looked over at Jack, who was moving restlessly and moaning in pain, without regaining consciousness.

"Losses are acceptable. You will always lose. And you will always win again. Whenever there's a loss, there's a new beginning. You will grow up again. You will love, live and die eventually… or you will laugh death in the face and get away a couple more times. Don't dwell on the losses. Look at what you've got."

"How can you say that?"

"I lost much. And won much. And you will, too. Focus on the present. Don't let the past haunt you if you want to stay sane."

"But this isn't just about me. It's about him too. He… really doesn't deserve this."

"Did he say that?"

"No, but… taking care of me like this isn't exactly what he wants to do. Or what he should do. He's leading SG-1 and they're supposed to be out there saving the world – not my butt," Daniel said with a sigh.

Pierson looked out of the window again, his weapon in one hand. "You are part of SG-1 and you are important."

"I screw up all the time."

"Then change it."

"How?"

"Learn to adjust. I'm sorry the Yggdrasil didn't work. I thought it would. Maybe you will find the missing part one day. But then again, maybe not. Don't just sit there and wait for a miracle. Live the life you have to. You can do it, believe me."

"How do you know?"

"I did it myself. Adjusting to new lives. It’s not so hard, really."

Daniel crouched at Jack's side and wiped the cold sweat from his face with the sleeve of his jacket. "He's running a fever."

"You need to build a stretcher as soon as Michaels gets here. You need to get him out of the valley."

Jack was panting and moaning. Suddenly he grabbed for Daniel's hand, clutching his fingers around it in a tight grip. His eyes flew open and he tried to focus on Daniel, who leaned over him, stroking his sweaty forehead.

"Hey, Jack. Help is coming. You have to hang in there," he soothed, trying to sound strong and grown up while he felt the panic fluttering in his stomach. 

"'kay?" Jack breathed. He tried to move his head to get a better look at Daniel, but the boy pressed him down again. 

"I'm okay. Don't worry about me. Your shoulder is bleeding and your knee is…"

"'s a sonuvabitch… sucks," Jack groaned, grimacing in pain.

"Yeah, hang in there, Jack. Sam is getting a medical team."

"Peachy." Then the brown eyes closed and his head fell to his side. Daniel felt for his pulse and, to his relief, found it. 

When he heard Pierson calling for him from the window, he reluctantly left Jack and joined the doctor. "We've got company."

Like an angel of wrath the dwarf woman came down the path. She seemed to hover over the ground, her golden hair fluttering behind her. And she was coming fast.

"You have that transportation device," Daniel whispered. "You can get us out of here."

"No. I tried that. It only works to get people in or out of the prison you were in."

Svartil was now very close. Daniel could hear her jingle bells voice calling for him. "Daniel, I know you are in there, my precious boy! Don't you remember what I offered you? You are going to be happy here, living without your burden, just watching over the Yggdrasil!"

He could hear the bells again, jingling in his head. This voice was so tempting, like a wonderful song… promising fairy tales and happiness… 

Somebody was shaking him and telling him not to listen to her. He felt hands clamping over his ears. 

But Svartil's voice was still there, luring him, promising… 

"It is wonderful here, the sun is always shining, you can swim in the lake all day! No burden, no responsibilities! Think about it, Daniel… only the Yggdrasil to watch. You will forget… The ritual wasn't complete… you will forget everything. All you will know is that you want to be here.” Svartil hovered in the entrance now, her eyes glittering and shimmering. Those sparkling eyes… so green….

"Don't look into her eyes, Daniel! Focus on my voice!"

But that voice meant nothing to him. It was just a voice. Svartil's voice was like sweet music… "You were meant to be here, Daniel. Don't fight it. Don't even think about fighting it. Stay and you will be happy forever."

"Stay away from him, Svartil! I have your Yggdrasil! See? You want it? Come on and get it," the other voice was yelling somewhere next to Daniel. Daniel didn't care. He stared at Svartil, drowning in those eyes. 

Eyes like green oceans, so deep… 

…and black. The eyes went black and the beautiful face turned into a grimace. Whirling away from him, Svartil stormed at Pierson, who withdrew deeper into the dark room.

"Youuu…. give it back! No outworlder can have the Yggdrasil! Only those who were chosen by the guardian can have it!" 

Daniel stumbled backwards. He fell down next to Jack. He shielded his ears with his hands fro m the screaming high-pitched voice of the dwarf woman. "It is hooolyyyy! Give it baaack! I will destroy you!"

Daniel couldn't hear Pierson anymore. He had to see what was going on. But a hand got hold of his jacket and pulled him back down with amazing strength. 

"Stay… down," Jack hissed. And even though he had to be insane with pain, there was enough authority in his voice to make Daniel hesitate. Jack's right arm came around him. It wasn't a very tight embrace and Daniel would have been able to free himself. But the next thing Jack said, was, "Please."

Daniel laid down next to Jack, listening to the screeching voice of Svartil in the back of the house. But now there was another voice again; equally as powerful, but calm and sane. "Your time is long over, Svartil of the Svartál. Leave the boy alone and go to hell!"

Then the white light was back and Svartil howled. Daniel covered Jack's body with his own and waited for the room to disappear.

  
  


A hand on his shoulder made him look up in confusion.

They were still lying on the floor and Doctor Pierson bent over them, a little smile on his face, his brown eyes bearing a look of satisfaction. 

"Wh….what just happened?"

"The little darling demon is in her own prison now and might stay there for eternity," Pierson said, grinning.

"You used the transporter. And you have the Yggdrasil?"

"Yes. And yes."

"You wanted that statue. That's why you're here," Daniel realized while his fingers stroked Jack's still face.

"I can't tell you everything. I wanted the statue, yes. I really am sorry it can't help you grow up. But maybe you are safer this way. Maybe it's not meant to be. I don't know that.“

"They're going to ground me forever," Daniel murmured.

“It seems you should stay on Earth rather than galloping through the universe for a while. When you have learned to deal with your life, they will let you continue. I'm sure they will. You are still Doctor Daniel Jackson."

"Yeah, right."

"The Ancients believe you are the Tau'ri's treasure, even though you don't have the Ancient gene. But you are gifted, Daniel.”

"What? What do you know about the Ancients?" 

But Pierson shook his head and smiled. "To quote Oma, you journey has just begun. It won't be easy and I'm not sure how you'll be able to accomplish it if you stay a child. It seems this is how it's meant to be though. But you have to be careful and listen to your Jack sometimes. He is here to take care of you. Because you are not immortal – even though you seem to have a few lives."

“What is the Ancient gene?" Daniel gaped at Pierson.

But the doctor got to his feet and grabbed his backpack. "I have to go. Michaels will be here soon. Don't worry about Jack too much. I don't know him as well as you do, but I guess he's a tough bastard. And if you ever find the missing stone of the Yggdrasil…" He pulled a little card out of his vest and handed it to Daniel. "Go here."

Daniel stared down at it. "It's a bar in … Paris?"

"Yeah. The Owner will know how to find me if you're asking the right questions and bring the stone with you. I'd be happy to help you grow up again when the time comes."

"You could help me to find it! You… you speak the language of the 'little people' and could help me translate. Maybe there's a hint or a destination," Daniel started, thinking of all the writings they had taped from the walls of the temple and cave.

"You're a smart guy. You figure it out yourself. Good luck."

Pierson placed his radio next to Jack. Then he vanished through the door.

Daniel scrambled to his feet and ran after him. But all he saw when he got out of the house was the still lake and the mountain walls in the distance. The doctor was gone. When he turned to go back inside, he could hear Michaels calling them.

He picked up the radio and told the colonel where they were.

Then he sat down at Jack's side again and waited.

*******

"Colonel O'Neill?"

Jack focused on that voice. It was the voice that meant he was rescued, safe and would live a couple of years longer, maybe… It was the voice of ol' Doc Fraiser. And when he cracked open an eye, there was the annoying flashlight shining in his pupils, making him cringe.

"There you are. Welcome back, Colonel," Janet smiled down at him.

Next thing he was aware of was the typical smell of the infirmary. Antiseptic. He didn't feel any pain, but his throat was sore so he had probably spent some personal time with a respirator not too long ago. He tried to say something, but his mouth was too dry to get any sound out.

"Here is someone who wants to feed you ice chips for a change." Fraiser said. She was still smiling. That was a good sign, right? 

He tried to keep his eyes open when another face appeared next to Fraiser’s. Two small hands pressed cool ice against his lips and Jack opened his mouth and felt the coldness as he sucked up the moisture. 

"I'll leave him to you. But only a few minutes. He needs to rest. And so do you, Colonel," Janet said firmly.

"I slept for hours," Daniel protested.

"You are still exhausted and I don't like your blood results. You need food, rest, rest and food. And a bath." There was that no-nonsense tone in Janet's voice and Jack could hear Daniel mumbling something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like something about cracking a whip.

He chuckled inwardly when he heard Janet leave his bedside.

"Hey," Daniel said, patting his cheek gently.

"Hey," he managed hoarsely. He got a few more ice chips, then Daniel wiped his face with a damp cloth. "How's it goin'?"

"I'm okay. Few scratches that's all. Janet fixed your knee. And your shoulder looks better. You lost lots of blood though," Daniel said, his hand back on Jack's cheek. “Michaels found us and Sam had the medical team on its way. Michaels built a stretcher. I passed out and then they carried you and me on it all the way through a waterfall. That was yesterday."

"Pierson?" Jack asked. He remembered the doctor had been with them before they were rescued.

"He… um… he's missing," Daniel mumbled.

"How?"

"Well, he left us and I don't know… he just left. I think he waited until we were gone and then used the gate to get away. He has the Yggdrasil."

Jack couldn't bring himself to sort all this out. Pierson was a bastard. He had known it. … or maybe not. He had just met him once a long time ago. To be honest, it hadn't been so bad. He couldn't remember the name of that bar they had met… Jon's? Joe's? Something like that. Was a nice place… 

Before he could ask more, Daniel whispered in a strangled voice, "You slept for a long time. I was afraid… I thought… even though Janet told me you're going to be okay. I thought, you... you…"

He put his good hand on Daniel's head, ruffling his hair. "Couldn't die on you, Wretch."

"I'm glad you didn't. I was so scared."

"You're in so much trouble, pal."

"Love you too, Jack."

He coughed. Something annoying had gotten in his eyes and he blinked a few times to get rid of it, before he croaked, "Yeah… right back at ya…"

The last thing he felt, before drifting back to sleep, were Daniel's lips pressing a kiss to his cheek. And in this moment, all was right with the world.

  
  



End file.
